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    nonetheless's Avatar
    nonetheless Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 6, 2009, 03:53 PM
    I love a guy whose 12 years older than me
    I love someone who is 12 years older than me and I'm only 16. Legally we can't be together but we both love each other. I feel almost stupid when I ask him to wait for me but he means so much to me and I can't ever stop thinking about him and this has been going on for a while. What should I do?
    elena3117's Avatar
    elena3117 Posts: 26, Reputation: 6
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    #2

    Jan 7, 2009, 01:36 PM

    You're just 16... in a few months you would even can't remember his name... try not to think about him for a while (no calls, no meetings) and you'll see that there are a lot of nice boys closer to your age...
    If I'am wrong then at least you'd have done a great test not only for your feelings but his too...
    ja77's Avatar
    ja77 Posts: 250, Reputation: 36
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    #3

    Jan 7, 2009, 01:39 PM

    This may just be my take on this but I really feel seeing someone 28 is to old for you.
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #4

    Jan 7, 2009, 02:19 PM

    It's called puppy love... or maybe infatuation. It will pass. 28 shouldn't even be on the radar for you. Don't worry about it, happens to us all. I would be more worried had you been the 28 year old, telling us you have fallen for a 16 year old... then we have problems! :)
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #5

    Jan 7, 2009, 02:38 PM

    Stay away from this guy because if you think your in love with him it might lead to you doing something that your regret.

    Depending of where you live he could get in trouble for just kissing you.

    Also, this guy has more experience than you and can be playing with your emotions to get what he want. So stay away! Date guys in your age range and learn the difference between love and lust because the both of them could be dangerous.
    ylaira's Avatar
    ylaira Posts: 1,193, Reputation: 118
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    #6

    Jan 7, 2009, 02:57 PM

    There's nothing wrong about the age gap it's just you are still young and there's more that awaits you.

    Don't rush into things. Stay logical, you'll see what patience can do.
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #7

    Jan 7, 2009, 03:56 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ylaira View Post
    There's nothing wrong about the age gap it's just you are still young and there's more that awaits you.
    Umm... yeah there is. Perhaps you mean, if he was 36, and she was 24, that would be different, then I agree. But, at 28, dating a 16 year old would be wrong, I don't care how you slice it.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #8

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:06 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ylaira View Post
    There's nothing wrong about the age gap it's just you are still young and there's more that awaits you.

    Don't rush into things. Stay logical, you'll see what patience can do.
    Do you say this because your involved with an older man? It okay for you date older guys because your not 16.

    Even though the age of consent is 16 in most states he could still get in legal trouble because of his age.
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #9

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:08 PM

    He is not from America.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #10

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:22 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by kctiger View Post
    He is not from America.
    Who isn't from America? Ylaria is an girl who happens to be dating an American. Also, me and other members had a discussion with her before on this issue involving a teenager dating an older guy.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #11

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:24 PM

    Basically this relationship has no good end.
    ja77's Avatar
    ja77 Posts: 250, Reputation: 36
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    #12

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:24 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by kctiger View Post
    He is not from America.

    Where are they from ?

    Not that this would change my first posting I still think it is not a good thing.

    I think it was on this forum I read a posting a few nights ago that said the normal age of a (male) pedophile was around 28? But then am I not correct in thinking that they look for children below 13 yrs... Maybe I am wrong.
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #13

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:25 PM

    Oops, I thought Ylaria was not from America, as the location on the avatar states Philippines. Sorry! :)
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #14

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:26 PM
    The OP is obviously from America, but I was referring to Ylaira, and the quote she had in reference to age. I though Ylaira was from the Philippines.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #15

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:35 PM

    Ylaira isn't American, she is from the Philippines. However Ylaira boyfriend is American. When you've time you can go back and read her thread.
    ylaira's Avatar
    ylaira Posts: 1,193, Reputation: 118
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    #16

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by liz28 View Post
    Do you say this because your involved with an older man? It okay for you date older guys because your not 16.

    Even though the age of consent is 16 in most states he could still get in legal trouble because of his age.
    Did I sound like Its okay that a 16 dates a 32 yr old?

    I believe I said she should wait and not rush into things because she's still young and may change her mind. Once she's old enough to decide what's best for her, if she still wants him then it's okay.
    Hey, Im 25.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #17

    Jan 7, 2009, 04:56 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ylaira View Post
    Did I sound like Its okay that a 16 dates a 32 yr old?

    I believe I said she should wait and not rush into things because she's still young and may change her mind. Once she's old enough to decide what's best for her, if she still wants him then it's okay.
    Hey, Im 25.

    Actually you did kind of sound like that. I was pretty sure you didn't mean it the way it sounded but it could have been interpreted that way. The problem here is while you are saying she should wait until she' sold enough, you don't define what that is.
    liz28's Avatar
    liz28 Posts: 4,662, Reputation: 1034
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    #18

    Jan 7, 2009, 05:05 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ylaira View Post
    There's nothing wrong about the age gap it's just you are still young and there's more that awaits you.

    Don't rush into things. Stay logical, you'll see what patience can do.
    This is what you wrote. You said there is nothing wrong with the age gap with means it's okay to be with him. Then you tell her to wait and be patient and I didn't agree with you.

    This girl should stay away from this guy and the guy should stay away from her. For her age the age difference is a big problem.
    ylaira's Avatar
    ylaira Posts: 1,193, Reputation: 118
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    #19

    Jan 7, 2009, 05:08 PM

    Kc translates it better for me.

    Quote Originally Posted by kctiger View Post
    Umm...yeah there is. Perhaps you mean, if he was 36, and she was 24, that would be different, then I agree. But, at 28, dating a 16 year old would be wrong, I don't care how you slice it.
    StopFishing's Avatar
    StopFishing Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #20

    Feb 18, 2009, 06:18 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by kctiger View Post
    Umm...yeah there is. Perhaps you mean, if he was 36, and she was 24, that would be different, then I agree. But, at 28, dating a 16 year old would be wrong, I don't care how you slice it.

    There is always different opinions with an age gap, but I believe that if the person makes you happy and feels the same about you, then age is not a factor. I'm in the same position as you - I'm 16 and my guy is 12 years older. Most people have accepted it because they see how happy we are.

    If he feels the same,and there is no evidence that he is going to use you, then go for it, but be prepared for people (especially your parents!) to object. If not, then there is always someone else out there who is perfect for you. :)
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