[radish]

I am often accused of being rude on the phone, or verbally to other workers. Most of these complaints result after I try to be humorous with someone who does not know me. I hear other workers talking in the same way. I am quiet, and some people think I am too serious, but when I try to lighten up, that is when I get complaints. My own supervisor bullies me. Another co-worker talks loudy about personal stuff for too much of the day. Another one gossips almost non stop. The other people in my area seem to like these women better than me.They often gossip and make fun of me, I saw proof of this one time on a computer screen. My supervisor is friendly with them. Should I try to be more like them? What can I do to prevent complaints of rudeness. Should I step up on my strengths so that my weekness is not predominant. I don't see any possibility of me or my supervisor leaving. Should I start complaining about all the behvoirs that irritate me?

[andrewc24301]

People will be that way. Just be yourself and to hell with anyone who has a problem with it.

Making friends and getting along with people is always a plus, but in truth, you are there to make a living, not make friends.

And I speak from experience, most people in this world "tolorate" me. I don't really have any friends, and I too get teased a lot. I can't seem to say anything to satisfy anyone. Does it bother me? Sometimes, but I try not to let it get me down. I still refuse to change for anyone else.

Anyone that you have to change for to be your friend isn't much of a friend. To have only one friend that likes you for who you are is always better than having 1000 friends who only liked you after you started marching to their beat.

[N0help4u]

Just be yourself and don't try to joke around or do things that get them complaining. It is your work place so don't even try to win them over as friends. Treat them like co-workers and don't expect friendship with them. I know it can be hard when they are making fun of you and talking behind your back and all but for now you need to ignore them cause if you try and make them like you or if they see they are pushing your buttons it will only get worse.

[N0help4u]

If they are really that intolerable maybe when they accuse you of being rude you may have to reply with something like ''and you are the perfect rose that I should be an example of''

[Clough]

Hi, radish!

It's a place where you do a job where someone employs you. If I were you, I would just try to be the best employee that you can by making yourself indispensable and an example for others to follow.

Thanks!

[Clough]

If someone insists on a reply by you or is rude to you, there are some good, short phrases that can work to keep them wondering and perhaps make them less likely to be complaining.

Some that I like to use are:

"Probably so..."

"I'll have to think about that." Or, "Please give me some time to think about that".

Two of my favorites are:

"May I speak with you when you're feeling better?" And, "I'm sorry that you're having a bad day, today".

[Alty]

Perhaps your humor comes off as sarcasm or rudeness. You said it yourself, it happens with people who don't know you.

You're there to work, not make friends. Be professional, do your job and the hell with everyone else.

Good luck.

[N0help4u]

Yes often I will play along with yeah I know I am crazy when you can turn what they say into you kid along with others about yourself they see they can't get to you and then they stop.

Have to spread the rep but yeah many people do not know how to take sarcasm and if you are not the kidding type personality it is hard to pull sarcasm off and get away with it. I would drop the making jokes since they take you serious.
Except for turning what they say directly about you into kidding around so they see they can't push your buttons.

[trmpldonagn]

So you're being accused of something while others are doing the same thing they're accusing you of? No good. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. I'm not sure if that applies anymore.

I agree with all of these answers here. Radish, you have a good idea yourself there; "step up on your strengths". I don't want to add, "so your weaknesses don't show." I don't like that part only because we all have weaknesses especially these people that are not so nice to you and they are also hypocrites. Sometimes it is OK to let your weaknesses show depending upon the situation. I'm not recommending it for your job because you do not know these people well enough it seems. They may just play on your weaknesses. I think you probably already know that. Don't be surprised though that if you step up on your strengths, it may actually bother them or some of them. Would you feel comfortable asking one (or more) of them outright to "help you" so to speak. Say try telling them that you want constructive criticism so that you can "work on it." Beware, that may still give them something to talk about. It's hard to know the exact situation especially without knowing these people. It could go either way. You'll eventually learn for yourself just by reaching out. Reach out to whoever whether it be friends, family, someone you're chatting with at the market... You'll be surprised. Right here on this site was a good start as I see all of the great answers you got. I also am sorry that you're dealing with this. And about your so called weaknesses, you will get stronger and stronger. You may even realize one day that all the while, you were the one with more strenghts than any of them. Best of luck to you always and heads up there, K?

[simplystupid]

If I where you I would stand up to them! Don't let them bullie you.. BE A MAN!

[trmpldonagn]

Simply, he might be a she. Either way, he or she could be on his or her way to being fired if he or she does what you say. I agree to a point but yiiiiikes. I really do agree with not letting anyone bully you. For sure! But we don't know how many allies there are and if anyone is there to defend him or her. Know what I mean jelly bean?

[MrinalMritsa]

Thanks a lot! I needed this... :)