[chris s]

My husband and I have been married for 16 yrs. Had a love m'ge he still loves me a lot & ia very possessive of me.but he is in a habit of seeking female attention always some way or the other. He makes female friends either online or at work and then talks to them in such a caring way that they fall for himand when I object to it he says that it doesn't mean a thing& he loves me a lot but he doesn't give up the frienship to those females with the fear of hurting them . Calls me suspicious wife.am I ? Pl help it is affecting me a lot emotionally and mentally.pl help

[Fr_Chuck]

He has no business keeping all of the female friends, esp online friends, He needs to be more respectful, so tell him it is you or them, he is already hurting you, so he does not care to hurt you but does not want to hurt them

[N0help4u]

Ask him what he would think if you started talking with men the way he talks with women.

[talaniman]

I agree with Nohelp4u's advise, just ask him how would he feel if the shoe was on the other foot, would he be a suspicious husband?

Better yet, don't ask tell him you can do as he does, the selfish b@st@d!

[lawanwadee]

Virtual relationship/friendship can lead to a real thing... cheating is cheating no matter in cyberspace or the real world.

He is such a selfish ---!!

[ordinaryguy]

The fact that he's possessive of you doesn't mean he loves you, it means he sees you as his possession.

[rebeccastrean22]

Posession- he want to control you while he can do what ever pleases him.

Leave him

[rebeccastrean22]

In my honest opinion is if he can look he will touch. If he talks he will do it.
Break the webcam and RIP up all his pornos and everything like that!! You don't need him

[gentleman]

I feel so sorry for you, there's no one among the people who've answered your question who actually believe in the sanctity of the institution of marriage. I may be wrong but it looks like everyone's found out a target to vent out their personal frustration upon.

Now, to your issue:

Your husband may be a bit more social than what you or some others are. I understand that he engages in flirtation with other women and I condemn it. But however, if I can take a little liberty to guess using the facts in your description, I tend to think that he is faced with the fear of his social reputation going down the drain if he had to make a sudden attempt to withdraw from all the friendships he's been maintaining.

Did you find out what the nature of these friendships are, and did you unearth evidence for emotional/sexual involvement? I have come across cases where a woman gets possessive of her husband to an extent that watching a movie with mature content in it, such as the "American Pie" disgusts her, and she begins distrusting her husband comparing him to a character in it. And in the case I'd witnessed, it was a simpleton husband who appreciated the movie, which only reinforced her suspicions about him.

If other women fell for him but he was just in love with you, then you should consider yourself lucky. Try to ensure that this is not the case before you follow anyone else's wrong advice.

After all, it is your life, and from the loss of a person who may be loving you above anything else, but may be erring in ignorance or under compulsions, it is you who is going to be hurt. Take control of your life and try to conquer him with love.

My best wishes for an everlasting married life,
Gentleman