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    dlebo84's Avatar
    dlebo84 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 23, 2008, 10:42 AM
    My 2yr old said she wanted to die!
    My daughter is only 2 and last night, she woke up in the middle of the night screaming and crying... when I went to get her out of bed, she clenched ahold of me sooo hard it was amazing. She looked at me and said "mommy, I wanna die"
    I am very concerned with this. I know she is only 2 and kids can say the weirdest things but what would make her say something like this? Her dad and I don't watch scary movies around her and we don't use that word around her. Please Help! I do not know what to do!
    southerngalps's Avatar
    southerngalps Posts: 1,334, Reputation: 112
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    #2

    Dec 23, 2008, 12:48 PM

    She has to have heard it somewhere. I think you should ask her why she said it. Investigate it a little more.

    Ask her why she said that after her dream.
    ITstudent2006's Avatar
    ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,243, Reputation: 329
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    #3

    Dec 23, 2008, 12:59 PM
    Did you ask her what she was dreaming of?

    A child of two years old, does not know the concept of death and dying. They were just brought into this world. I would suspect she heard it from someone/somewhere. Like southerngalps said I would investigate a little more into it.

    I wish you the best of luck!
    dlebo84's Avatar
    dlebo84 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Dec 23, 2008, 01:31 PM
    To answer both of you, I did ask her where and why she said it but she didn't say anything. She just kept repeating it.
    ITstudent2006's Avatar
    ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,243, Reputation: 329
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    #5

    Dec 23, 2008, 01:39 PM
    Did you ask her when this happened or next day?
    Did she experience any sort of trauma in her young life?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #6

    Dec 23, 2008, 01:48 PM

    The more you dwell on this with her and question her, the more upset and obsessive both of you will become. She may have heard another adult use the word or have heard it on TV. Kids pick up stuff from the most normal places and their quick little minds store it all in their unconscious to be blurted out at strange times.

    She probably had a nightmare and her mind pulled together all sorts of images and words.

    Keep her days happy and her bedtime routine normal and boring and predictable to wind her down from her day. (If you don't have such a routine, please get one going!)
    dlebo84's Avatar
    dlebo84 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Dec 23, 2008, 01:52 PM
    Well last night was not the first time she said it. She said it the day before last night and when I asked her why she said it and why she wanted to, she just laughed and continued doing what she was doing. Then the next day, which would have been last night, she woke up screaming and crying and that's when she said it again. She didn't experience any type of trauma. I know she is definitely afraid of santa clause and the grinch but other than that, she's pretty good! The other day, she also pointed to the corner of the living room and started to whimper and cry as if something/someone was there... Im just worried... is this something I should go to a doctor or priest about?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #8

    Dec 23, 2008, 02:02 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by dlebo84 View Post
    well last night was not the first time she said it. She said it the day before last night and when i asked her why she said it and why she wanted to, she just laughed and continued doing what she was doing. then the next day, which would of been last night, she woke up screaming and crying and thats when she said it again. She didnt experience any type of trauma. I know she is definately affraid of santa clause and the grinch but other than that, shes pretty good! The other day, she also pointed to the corner of the living room and started to whimper and cry as if something/someone was there.... Im just worried...is this something i should go to a doctor or priest about??
    It sounds like she's got your number and is pushing your buttons. Please stop questioning her about this. When she points to the corner and cries, calmly get her interested in something else happy and fun... start singing a nursery rhyme and walk to another room where you start another activity like coloring or playing with blocks. You're even getting to me, and I'm going to have nightmares tonight!
    southerngalps's Avatar
    southerngalps Posts: 1,334, Reputation: 112
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    #9

    Dec 23, 2008, 02:10 PM

    Well, I think there is a possibility that she could be seeing something.

    But wondergirl is right. You need to keep her interested in something else.
    ITstudent2006's Avatar
    ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,243, Reputation: 329
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    #10

    Dec 23, 2008, 02:13 PM
    Wondergirl you're not very helpful. It's not like 2 years old do this all the time. How many 2 years old have told you that they wanted to die? I bet none! Telling the mom she is getting on your nerves is rude and disrespectful. Don't answer the thread if it makes you upset. If you think it's nothing then write nothing. Go on with your day!

    On the other hand, it wouldn't hurt to take the child to a her physician just to check. It's something that rarely happens and maybe should be looked into. Don't let wondergirl get you down, as a parent living by the quote "better safe then sorry" NEVER hurts!

    Hope this helps!


    P.S. Wondergirl I realize you're an expert and all and I will probably get in trouble for what I wrote but yor negativity in this matter is not suitable and shouldn't have to be tolerated! I am sorry!
    KISS's Avatar
    KISS Posts: 12,510, Reputation: 839
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    #11

    Dec 23, 2008, 02:34 PM

    I can offer a couple of possibilites:

    1. pushing your buttons and wants/needs attention
    2. She may have a "gift" that may allow her to "see the other side"

    Look at some posts by "Alder"
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #12

    Dec 23, 2008, 02:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ITstudent2006 View Post
    Wondergirl you're not very helpful. It's not like 2 years old do this all the time. How many 2 years old have told you that they wanted to die? I bet none!
    Actually, both of my sons did somewhere around age 2 or 3. They hear things, they get upset, adults around them get upset hearing them be upset. That age group has developing emotions roiling around all over the place.

    Telling the mom she is getting on your nerves is rude and disrespectful. Don't answer the thread if it makes you upset. If you think it's nothing then write nothing. Go on with your day!
    You obviously misread what I wrote.

    P.S. Wondergirl I realize you're an expert and all and I will probably get in trouble for what I wrote but yor negativity in this matter is not suitable and shouldn't have to be tolerated! I am sorry!
    I was not negative at all, but advised the OP to mentally and emotionally move her child into positive territory. Please reread what I wrote with that in mind.
    ITstudent2006's Avatar
    ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,243, Reputation: 329
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    #13

    Dec 23, 2008, 02:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Wondergirl View Post
    Please stop questioning her about this. You're even getting to me, and I'm going to have nightmares tonight!
    This isn't negative? Demoralizing to the parent?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #14

    Dec 23, 2008, 03:01 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ITstudent2006 View Post
    this isn't negative? demoralizing to the parent?
    I should have added the LOL that I thought was implicit in my comment. I thought the exclamation mark was enough. Guess not.

    (Obviously, an adult will not have nightmares from reading something on AMHD.)
    ITstudent2006's Avatar
    ITstudent2006 Posts: 2,243, Reputation: 329
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    #15

    Dec 23, 2008, 03:04 PM
    Wow real expert like! I am saying as a parent everyhting we do is in the best interest of our kids. I go by the better safe then sorry motto! I would appreciate less attackful messages like assuming I don't have kids and no knowledge of raising them!

    Thank you and goodbye!
    KISS's Avatar
    KISS Posts: 12,510, Reputation: 839
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    #16

    Dec 23, 2008, 08:14 PM

    Merry Christmas!
    Addison08's Avatar
    Addison08 Posts: 26, Reputation: 4
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    #17

    Dec 28, 2008, 11:03 PM
    I know this is a little late, but I haven't been on here in a while. I thought I'd share my experience in this area. I honestly believe that kids are just born with the ability to see what adults cannot see. There are kids out there who grow up with these abilities that grow stronger as they learn more. My suggestion would be to record any incidences that my occur. This way you can see if there is a pattern and also I would suggest finding books at the library or book store that can help you understand what's going on. Not only medium and spiritual books, but child psychology books as well. I've done a lot of research on this topic because my daughter does this exact same thing.

    About 3 months ago it was oh 8 pm in the evening and I had sent my daughter to bed. We go through a ritual every night of getting the snack, milk, the teeth brushed, and so on. Well I got her all tucked in and flipped her little TV on then I kissed her goodnight and shut off the light then shut the door to a crack. My daughter will not sleep in the dark nor will she sleep with just the hall light on. Some people who have these medium abilities use sounds or white noise to block out the spirits who come in. My daughter is young (3) and has not control over who visits her. So her way to block out the talking and interruptions is to have the TV on a low hum all night. I'm the same way I get a lot more sleep this way.

    Anyway I went to the living room and sat down and a couple hours passed. I go to check on her she is fine, asleep, the TV is down but it's on. I walk back to the living room and sit down after a half hour I hear this horrible screaming coming from her room. So I run in there and her TV is off and she is on her bed screaming. She is yelling I am going to die I am going to die. I'm so confused and scared at the same time and she is clinging to me with this clench that is so strong it almost hurt. I got her to speak to me I asked her over and over what she meant. She yelled and pointed to her toy bucket, right next to it. She said that girl is dead and she is here she is here she died help her. Now it is pretty cold where I live so the heater is always on at night. My daughters room was warm at this point. I stood up walked right over and stuck my hand in the spot where she was pointing and it was ice cold. It also felt like a foot or hand does when it falls asleep. It was like a ball of electricity and there was no explanation for it. She refused to sleep in her room until whatever it was left. Eventually she did go back in there but now she will not go into a dark space or room she must have a light on.

    I can sympathize with my daughter because I went through this as a child. But I didn't have anyone to run to because my parents were strict about bed time. I am not saying they didn't love me but as I got older it was about coping, learning, and understanding what was going on. So when this occurs I stay with her, calm her down, and talk to her to work through it. Sometimes she does end up in my room because she is too afraid to be alone. Some people think, ah, 2 it's just a kid being a kid. But sometimes it can definitely be more then that. As they grow they can explain more; but when my daughter was 2 the only way I could get her to really talk was through coloring and pictures. I'd ask her to draw/color what she saw or point at a picture of what she saw. We learned to communicate and eventually she learned to tell me what it is that she was seeing.

    So I do suggest taking two roads on this. Find some good books that explain about children that are mediums and also some child psychology books. Both aspects help you learn about how to deal with both levels of a this situation. Good luck, either way that this ends up I hope you get down to the bottom of it and it all works out for you.
    FroOGle's Avatar
    FroOGle Posts: 37, Reputation: 1
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    #18

    Dec 28, 2008, 11:16 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by ITstudent2006 View Post
    Wondergirl you're not very helpful. It's not like 2 years old do this all the time. How many 2 years old have told you that they wanted to die? I bet none! Telling the mom she is getting on your nerves is rude and disrespectful. Don't answer the thread if it makes you upset. If you think it's nothing then write nothing. Go on with your day!

    On the other hand, it wouldn't hurt to take the child to a her physician just to check. It's something that rarely happens and maybe should be looked into. Don't let wondergirl get you down, as a parent living by the quote "better safe then sorry" NEVER hurts!

    Hope this helps!


    P.S. Wondergirl I realize you're an expert and all and I will probably get in trouble for what I wrote but yor negativity in this matter is not suitable and shouldn't have to be tolerated! I am sorry!
    I agree with both of you

    Mabye this is something to see sombody about
    But she may be at a point where she want's all the attention
    dlebo84's Avatar
    dlebo84 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #19

    Dec 29, 2008, 11:04 AM
    Well I just want to thank everyone for their opinions and suggestions. My daughter has been doing pretty good lately. I did walk through my house and said "In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, I demand anyone and/or anything to leave my house now" in every room and I have also been watching everything that she likes to watch and what my husband and I say. I did notice that on the movie, Ice Age, both one and two, the sloth does say about dying and my daughter use to watch that all the time in my car dvd player which I also stopped letting her watch.

    And Im am a wonderful mother, and when things like this come out of my daughters mouth, of course I'm going to be concerned and I am going to question her. Wondergirl, I understand that questioning her can be annoying to you but I asked her once and that was it. Im pretty sure if something horrible would come out of your own child's mouth, it would bug you especially when the child is so young. It says expert by your name but in my opinion, no one is an expert when it comes to parenting. There are so many different and new things that happen when raising a child and everyone has different views on how to handle a situation.
    Alder's Avatar
    Alder Posts: 342, Reputation: 71
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    #20

    Dec 29, 2008, 05:45 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by KeepItSimpleStupid View Post
    Look at some posts by "Alder"
    Well thank you, KISS! Quite a pleasant surprise to see someone recommended me. ;)

    I'm a parent of two kids myself, and if either of them said anything like that to me, at any age, I'd freak out, even given what weird circles I tend to move in. When my son was about two, he was putting sounds together randomly, and just happened to say "whiskey" after saying several nonsense words (kind of the monkeys and typewriters phenomenon). Of course, when both his mom and I reacted to hear a little toddler call for whiskey, he started saying it a lot more, especially once he realized we were terrified he would say it around the grandparents. So the first hypothesis offered by KeepItSimpleStupid is pretty plausible.

    The second option, that this child has some type of psychic gift or the like, makes some sense, too (at least to a person like me who believes in such things). There are all kinds of human beliefs and traditions from all around the world about where we go when we die. Likewise, there are many different traditions about where we were before we were here. Someone once told me he was trying to keep a two-year-old entertained, and running out of ideas, and purely to try to get the kid's attention and keep him from getting into mischief, blurted out, "Have you ever been on the moon?" The child's whole demeanor changed, and he looked up and said very calmly, "Yes, I've been on the moon." The adult asked what it was like, and the child gave this very elaborate description that didn't sound like anything he had gotten from TV or the like. The adult was left wondering whether the child was actually describing a memory from some pre-life state. If you've ever really looked into the eyes of a newborn, or even an older child, sometimes you see a depth there--I can't explain it--as if you are seeing into another world. Whether it's the Mormon pre-existence or the Hindu bardo or something completely different, you have to wonder how long very small children remember what it was like in whatever form of being they had before they started this one.

    So, it may well be that this little girl is just saying that she remembers some other world, and apparently it was a nice place to be. If so, you can't blame her for being a little nostalgic for it. I certainly agree that you don't want to feed this thing by showing the child you are frightened or upset by her saying she wants to die. On the other hand, I think it can be harmful to a child to pretend anything they're doing doesn't exist. A lot of the therapy we have to go through as adults has its seeds in our earliest caregivers giving us the message (unintentional or well intentioned though it may have been) that we had to hide who we really were and pretend to be something else, be it the "dutiful son" or whatever, in order to be loved and noticed and accepted. (That goes double for kids with psychic gifts!) So I would say it is important to acknowledge her experience and let her know that she doesn't have to hide it to get your love. If she says to you she wants to die, you could take her in her arms and say, "You will die, someday. So will I. We are human beings, and all humans die. It is an important part of our life. But I love you very much, and I don't think either of us is going to die for many, many years, and that makes me happy, because I like having you here with me."

    This assumes, of course, that otherwise she is doing OK. If she were acting withdrawn or depressed all the time, then you might want to talk to a doctor or psychologist about it. Clinical depression can develop that young. But if she's otherwise perky and precocious, then it may be she is just a very unusual child. The best thing to do with an unusual child is to let her know that it's OK to be unusual. That you think she is wonderful just for being her.

    Blessings to you and your family.

    Alder

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