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Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 10:36 AM

What's up guys and gals! Just thought I toss out a new topic in my life. As most of you know I am in a relationship and everything. Well lately she has been really "off" and depressed, kind of snapping on me. She hasn't been able to find a job and her ex recently was released from the rehab facility. So today she snapped on me again and then when I thought everything was fine and we were going good through texts... I get the line "we need to talk tonight when you get home"

I just really needed to get that off my chest, I know the whole don't just to conclusions stuff and just be relaxed but it still weighed pretty heavy.

kctiger · Dec 10, 2008, 10:38 AM

Hard to say, and obviously your mind wants to jump to conclusions. I HATE that line. May as well just leave work now and have that talk, cause work productivity drops to zero at that point. She seems really stressed though, so who knows man... I am as perplexed as you are.

southerngalps · Dec 10, 2008, 10:41 AM

Eeek. What a sick feeling! You know that it is not going to be about anything you did, but what she is going through, right? Or maybe it isn't even what you are expecting.

I know how hard it is to love (care) for someone while they are going through trying times. I have been there. Best of luck tonight! Give an update!

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 10:48 AM

Yea I know... Sucks with work... I'm like come on! Now the time is going to drag by and no way can you have a talk like that over text. And who knows what's going through her head but whenever someone gives you that "we need to talk" line, immediately you think "Sh!t it's over. I'm trying to not jump to conclusions and am fighting the urge to text her a bunch. Thankfully I have this site to filter out my thoughts and urges ha ha.

Southern, I agree it is EXTREMELY hard to see them going through hard times. It's like you are the one who is helping the most but often times that puts you in the cross hairs when the wraith hits!

kctiger · Dec 10, 2008, 10:50 AM

You have a good head on your shoulders and know it is stupid to immediately think of the worst possible conclusion (even though we do). Keep your head up. I am sure it is something that doesn't have anything to do with your relationship.

DazT · Dec 10, 2008, 10:53 AM

If the worst comes to the worst, take some of your own advice mate.

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 10:55 AM

Yea, It does show one thing, how much I have changed over the year since my break up because last year, it would have been me texting up a storm and begging for some type of explanation and what's going to happen to us. Now I know to give it space and even though the worst possible scenario is in my head, I'm not going to immediately suck into that one.

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 10:56 AM

Dazt, yep. The thing about it all is, I know have so many support lines that I know I can get through it a lot better. I have made a great circle of friends on here and everything, I came here last year a cocky kid who wanted to find out ways to get his ex back and now I am the one telling the same cocky kids that it ended for a reason.

ZoeMarie · Dec 10, 2008, 10:57 AM

I'm not going to give you false hope or anything because I have no idea what she's going through, but if it makes you feel better I've told my husband that we need to talk before because there's something we need to go over that I just don't want to forget to tell him. Just like a "set some time aside later so we can discuss something." I know my mother-in-law says "we need to talk" a lot and it always got my husband and I in a panic. Once she asked if I wanted to move in with them (before we got married). So it's not always bad.

DazT · Dec 10, 2008, 10:59 AM

Very true. You learn a lot when you join this website don't you?

Anyway - it might not be what you think it is. But, if it is, you've been here before and you got through, you can do it again.

We're right there with you!

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 11:00 AM

Ha ha Yea, I know it's not always bad and she is under a lot of stress and it could be a simple apology for how she has been treating me. She is really nervous about her ex because of their past and how he treated her, the whole out of work thing.

Just whenever someone hears that line, you always think of the worst

ZoeMarie · Dec 10, 2008, 11:01 AM

Originally Posted by Romefalls19

Ha ha Yea, I know it's not always bad and she is under a lot of stress and it could be a simple apology for how she has been treating me. She is really nervous about her ex because of their past and how he treated her, the whole out of work thing.

Just whenever someone hears that line, you always think of the worst

That's true, but the way I look at it, if you think the worst and it's nothing, it feels a lot better than being surprised with bad news.

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 11:01 AM

Dazt, Yep.. This site has been such a great aid to everything in my life, relationships usually go a lot smoother when you learn some of the things that I have on this site.

TrueFaith · Dec 10, 2008, 11:03 AM

So have you spoken with her. Do you know what the poblem is?

I know the line we need to talk, Means a bad news in a relationship

But it could be many many things! She could even say sorry for being so snappy lately.

Anyway I hope it all works out for you :)

asking · Dec 10, 2008, 11:04 AM

Originally Posted by Romefalls19

Yea, It does show one thing, how much I have changed over the year since my break up because last year, it would have been me texting up a storm and begging for some type of explanation and what's going to happen to us. Now I know to give it space and even though the worst possible scenario is in my head, I'm not going to immediately suck into that one.

I guess I'd ask for a headline. You obviously ARE worried. I think if I asked for some time to talk to someone, I'd tell them what I wanted to talk about. So you think it's bad to let her know that her remark has you worried? I guess I could go either way on this. In any case, it's only a few hours.

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 11:09 AM

No, she was completely vague and don't really want to push the envelope with the issue. I told her I am worried, and she said "why" and I told her I have only gotten that line twice in my life and it never worked out well and she goes "ok then"

TrueFaith · Dec 10, 2008, 11:25 AM

Well. That does not sound like the best reply
You poor your heat out and she goes OK then..

Well if I was you man I would personaly ring her up and say look.
If you want to talk to me about some personaly issue you are having awesome but

If you are going to break up with me just do it. Because I really don't want to drive all the way to your house to be dumped.
And 2nd I really need to get on with my work

So what's it to be?

Romefalls19 · Dec 10, 2008, 11:31 AM

We live together ha ha... So I have to go home and face her anyway. I'm doing my best to just calm down because I feel if I call her I will only be angry and she wants to talk face to face. I would like to know if it is ending though.

kctiger · Dec 10, 2008, 11:33 AM

The waiting game is what sucks about this!! They always know how to push our buttons in our mind don't they?

TrueFaith · Dec 10, 2008, 11:33 AM

Dude you have to update us.. to see what she says

I hate waiting as well! Arf!