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DebN1962 · Dec 3, 2008, 06:59 PM

Thanks for the advice. I will call the Chapter in the area. I'm new to this. I also think our County is just too small - not enough knowledgeable people even though statistics on the drug usage is high for this County. Perhaps Seattle is the best place to find someone else.
D

DebN1962 · Dec 5, 2008, 10:39 PM

So what is the street value of Oxy? And here's a new one... a drug dealer wants $500.00 now from her. Do drug dealers front the stuff? And is this a job of a drug dealer to go to certain areas everyday? Even travel by Ferry and go another 40 miles. So the guy apparently is now threatening (me) via her text mail that I just read that was sent to her... So am I the only in this situation and ask? I feel this is such a made up story.
D

artlady · Dec 5, 2008, 11:11 PM

My 21 son, a recovered user is giving this advice...

*If you give her money don't expect that it is going to be for only suboxono because that drug is not going to get her high. She is going to use it to buy another drug with which she can get high, Don't believe anything a junkie says.*End quote.

I agree with others here who have said she can not and should not try to attempt to detox herself .

Trying to detox yourself is potentially dangerous. Depending on the level of her addiction it can lead to seizures and blood pressure problems and all manner of things that are best left to professionals.

I don't want to scare you anymore than you already are but depending on her age you can and should force her to seek medical help.If she is an adult I still would not give her money but I would get informed real fast about her addiction and do everything in your power to find services for her.

I've been there and by the grace of God and a lot of hard work we got through it.

You need to get informed and sorry to say but don't believe anything she tells you.. as a junkie ,she is not the daughter you know and love she is just a sad lost junkie... I' m very sorry

If love made it better it would just go away but it doesn't and

Please don't blame yourself!

All Gods love to you both!

If you need to talk more please don't hesitate.. I have really been through this .

KBC · Dec 6, 2008, 09:56 AM

Originally Posted by DebN1962

So what is the street value of Oxy? And heres a new one... a drug dealer wants $500.00 now from her. Do drug dealers front the stuff? And is this a job of a drug dealer to go to certain areas everyday? Even travel by Ferry and go another 40 miles. So the guy apparently is now threatening (me) via her text mail that I just read that was sent to her... So am I the only in this situation and ask? I feel this is such a made up story.
D

While I have no idea the street value(it probably varies from area to area anyway)You asked,do they front it,, I never met a dealer I didn't like who wouldn't front me at least for a while.If they can keep an addict supplied and then pressure them later to 'pay up' causing more chaos to the addict,making the addict do desperate and reckless things to be able to pay the front,and then buy even more,to chase away the chaos brought on in the first place,, yes, a vicious cycle.

Maybe letting her text back and state something like,she has been arrested and the police are monitoring her cell phone,checked on her texts and calls and are looking for a connection.

I wish I had the 'old' way of thinking,the police might have a better way to handle this(and keep the 2 of you out of harms way)

A dealer just wants paid,but YOU are not responsible to pay her bills.

Hope this helped,

KBC

N0help4u · Dec 6, 2008, 10:02 AM

You are not responsible for her 'bills' but there is nothing ethical or moral with how a dealer goes about things. Like in the movies you will see a dealer shoot up a house and not care who gets killed inside. All they are looking for is revenge.
If your daughter is making this up then it would do you good to call her bluff and tell her that you called the police and see if she changes her story. If she sticks with it you do need to involve the police to help you with your safety.

J_9 · Dec 6, 2008, 11:05 AM

Originally Posted by DebN1962

So my daughter goes to the doctor and he tells her he has seen worse cases then her, and that she shouldn't even be there.

Did the doctor tell you this or did your daughter? If it was your daughter I believe the addiction is speaking and she is making excuses for her addiction. I've seen it done many times.

**EDIT** The doctor most likely will not call you back as it would be a HIPAA violation to discuss her heath care with you unless she has signed a waiver.

JudyKayTee · Dec 6, 2008, 11:18 AM

Originally Posted by KBC

While I have no idea the street value(it probably varies from area to area anyway)You asked,do they front it,,,I never met a dealer I didn't like who wouldn't front me at least for a while.If they can keep an addict supplied and then pressure them later to 'pay up' causing more chaos to the addict,making the addict do desperate and reckless things to be able to pay the front,and then buy even more,to chase away the chaos brought on in the first place,,,yes, a vicious cycle.

Maybe letting her text back and state something like,she has been arrested and the olice are monitoring her call phone,checked on her texts and calls and are looking for a connection.

I wish I had the 'old' way of thinking,the police might have a better way to handle this(and keep the 2 of you out of harms way)

A dealer just wants paid,but YOU are not responsible to pay her bills.

Hope this helped,

KBC

In my area it's $100 for a 7.5, sometimes higher - I'm in NY, the Police just made a sweep and pretty much closed the parking lot market.

If the Police make a seizure they WAY inflate it because it makes for a better newspaper article, same with Homeland Security.

My husband is a Pharmacist; was not unusual to be offered far more than that if he would sell over the counter.

foxigirl83 · Dec 6, 2008, 12:43 PM

I know this problem all too well. I have also struggled with opiate addiction and likely the reason she is begging you to act quickly is because withdrawals are just that awful. Sleepless nights, anxiety, the terrible pain, and nausia. Depending on how much she was taking there is often a high risk of seizures accompanied with the other unpleasant side effects of withdrawl. There are methadone outpatient clinics that will treat her with Buprenorphine (Suboxine) or methadone . Depending on where you live the length of the programs may vary quite a bit. I attend a methadone maintenance program used to treat opiate addiction and my situation has improved immensly. I am much much much more stable emotionally and employment wise. I don't go out hunting down pain killers anymore and I am working and have been over the last year since starting the program. Before that I never wanted to work and was out all hours of the night trying to score. These programs allow you to taper from the suboxine or methadone which is the most effective way to avois withdrawals from these medications. Some people argue that these drugs are no better than the original addiction, but you have to keep in mind that ideally you won't be in this program forever. Along with receiving a counselor you can attend classes that taech you about relapse prevention. As you taper off you can work on yourself and getting strong so when you have tapered to the end you have gained the stability and courage you will need to face the world in a complete state of sobriety.

spyderglass · Dec 13, 2008, 09:36 PM

In my area oxycontin goes for about a dollar a mg. And yes if she was selling drugs the dealer may have fronted her the money. If she was the 'middle' person he was probably selling her the pills 50 dollars per 80mg pill. I think if you started going to NA meetings or AA meetings listening in, abd asking questions then that will help you understand what you are dealing with. One of the first things I came to understand about addiction is that you should assume that every word the addict says is a lie.

mikedem7 · Dec 14, 2008, 05:22 AM

All these posts are completely right and it is very important to not self mecaite. Please see a professional no matter how much it costs. There are many parents who wish they did this sooner. Good luck

DebN1962 · Feb 6, 2009, 11:10 PM

Originally Posted by artlady

My 21 son, a recovered user is giving this advice....

*If you give her money don't expect that it is going to be for only suboxono because that drug is not going to get her high. She is going to use it to buy another drug with which she can get high, Don't believe anything a junkie says.*End quote.

I agree with others here who have said she can not and should not try to attempt to detox herself .

Trying to detox yourself is potentially dangerous. Depending on the level of her addiction it can lead to seizures and blood pressure problems and all manner of things that are best left to professionals.

I don't want to scare you anymore than you already are but depending on her age you can and should force her to seek medical help.If she is an adult I still would not give her money but I would get informed real fast about her addiction and do everything in your power to find services for her.

I've been there and by the grace of God and a lot of hard work we got through it.

You need to get informed and sorry to say but don't believe anything she tells you..as a junkie ,she is not the daughter you know and love she is just a sad lost junkie... I' m very sorry

If love made it better it would just go away but it doesn't and

please don't blame yourself!

All Gods love to you both!!

If you need to talk more please don't hesitate ..I have really been through this .

I'm really stupid, I haven't been giving her money, yet she has beaten the system. The doctor has followed through with "yes" she has been to her appointments, and "yes" her tox's have been clean. But I find out tonight that she has asked others (namely her older sister) for her clean urine. So how is she getting past this? She's been lying and yet still works ( think - but probably about ready to lose her job she has been calling in). But we see no money, and now she's behind on bills. We are calling her bluff this weekend. Wish me luck. I cannot help her anymore - she's 19 and refuses inpatient treatment. How can I let her hit rock bottom with out getting hurt?

DebN1962 · Feb 6, 2009, 11:19 PM

Originally Posted by KBC

Glad to be of assistance,and hey!! Don't be a stranger to Ask Me Help Desk,we would all like to see how this turns out for you both!!

:) kbc

Yep, I'm stupid. No cash was given, but I've been paying for treatment, and the doctor came through with "yes" she has been to every visit and "yes" she has been testing clean. However, I hear from her sister that she had asked her for clean urine two weeks ago. How can this get past them? We are calling her bluff this weekend, no more groceries, no more help in bills. Will this kill me or her? I don't want to see her in anymore trouble than I think she already is in... I can't force her to do anything she's 19. But I believe she's about to lose her job since she has called in a few times without good reason, and her boyfriend has been arrested and bailed out by her - so there goes some drug money I hope. She never use to be a follower but a leader and now she thinks of nothing but him, and I'm not making excuses for her but he has got to go, will she ever see he is the problem and got her here? And that she can make her own choice not his? I wish I had all the answers.
D

DebN1962 · Feb 7, 2009, 12:22 PM

Yep, I'm stupid. No cash was given, but I've been paying for treatment, and the doctor came through with "yes" she has been to every visit and "yes" she has been testing clean. However, I hear from her sister that she had asked her for clean urine two weeks ago. How can this get past them? We are calling her bluff this weekend, no more groceries, no more help in bills. Will this kill me or her? I don't want to see her in anymore trouble than I think she already is in... I can't force her to do anything she's 19. But I believe she's about to lose her job since she has called in a few times without good reason, and her boyfriend has been arrested and bailed out by her - so there goes some drug money I hope. She never use to be a follower but a leader and now she thinks of nothing but him, and I'm not making excuses for her but he has got to go, will she ever see he is the problem and got her here? And that she can make her own choice not his? I wish I had all the answers.
D

artlady · Feb 7, 2009, 12:36 PM

Just today I gave someone the following link and while we never want to give up on our kids sometimes we have to detach ,just for a little slice of sanity.
At this stage of the game,she is not thinking like your daughter anymore,She is thinking ,if at all ,like an addict.
I hope the article I cite will be useful to you. My game plan when I was going through this was try everything until you find something that works.He just got clean on his own.Maybe it was all that praying,he decided he didn't want it anymore.
He was also very mean when he was on dope so that is a behavior to look for.
I wish you the best and know that you are not alone, you always have an ear here. Michele

How Can I Help An Alcoholic or Drug Addict? - Specific Things You Can Do To Help

DebN1962 · Feb 7, 2009, 02:17 PM

Thank you!
D

imgimpy · Feb 9, 2009, 09:29 AM

Please do not give your daughter money for any drug.Have the doc prescribe the suboxin.Then if you choose you can pay the pharmacist. Its becoming very available on the street now.opioid addiction needs to be addressed by a pro.If your daughter will not get a therapist she may not be ready to quit.There are also supprort groups out there that may be able to give you some answers.Good luck!

DebN1962 · Sep 17, 2009, 07:31 PM

So its been about 8 months+ since I thought things were fine, and things were getting better... Not any more, she was just arrested, same boyfriend, which we thought she dumped since he burglarized our house. She's on some serious charges being a first time offender, and now her life just might be over for having any chance at any good job. She just took the placement test for College, and then this happens. Now what?

Survivor07 · Oct 10, 2009, 10:18 AM

I'm sorry to hear that it has gone this way, though I'm not surprised.

She needs to be held responsible for her own actions. Maybe jail might be a wake up call.

I feel for you. I know how frustrating it is to watch someone lose their life to drug addiction.

Update us please. We are here for support.

talaniman · Oct 10, 2009, 12:16 PM

It really is up to her what happens next, all you can do is pray for her. Maybe jail will do what you cannot.