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talaniman · Aug 19, 2006, 11:10 AM

Don't feel bad. What you have done is brought to light a BIG problem and taken action to correct it. Even though everyone else is against you, did you stop and think they have done NOTHING to help this serious situation? Forget them and continue to do the right thing and be strong They don't care, you do. In the long run you've helped this young man and helped the girls too. Might not seem like it now, but you'll see.

GaryArt · Aug 20, 2006, 01:16 AM

If you know, or have reasonable cause to suspect, that a 15 year old is, has, or has attempted, to sexually abuse a three year old, then the situation is so far beyond the ability of someone without professional training, that no judgment you make, however well-meaning, can be sound, especially when you are a member of the same family, and are so obviously emotionally stressed by the situation. This is no different than if a family member had, or probably had a brain tumor - No matter how much you care, want to help, love the person, etc. you are not trained or capable of dealing with it. That the boy is conscious of the fact that what he is doing is wrong is absolutely NOT a guarantee that he will be able to resist the powerful urges he experiences. You must seek professional assistance - certainly, within appropriate limitations, you can select the professional you turn to,as well as the timing. But, you must seek the guidance of a professional, and trust in their skilled judgment, and their ability to be objective and make decisions in the best interests of everyone involved. Consider the consequences for any of the younger children if you make the wrong decision, and he hurts one of them, emotionally, sexually, or physically... And, given the difference in age and physical size, what if he inflicts some sort of permanent injury? You should also be aware that in some jurisdictions, if you know or have reason to suspect abuse of a minor child (even by another minor child), and fail to report the same to a hospital, mental health professional, or law enforcement officer, you could be charged with a serious criminal offense yourself. Good luck and God Bless You. Steel yourself, and do what you must.

grandma215 · Sep 7, 2006, 12:25 PM

Hi, I know your heart is hurting for this boy, but you and your sister needs to protect the three younger girls in that family, you really need to seek any kind of help you can get for him, even if its by turning him in. Then you can work on getting him help. He needs to be kept away from those girls. No matter how much you try to keep a eye on him, he can find a way. Those three little girls and any other in the neighborhood needs your help also. Don't take a chance like this, you could be hurting the lives of three or more girls. This would really be hard to live with, knowing you could have kept them safe.

applelonia · Sep 27, 2006, 11:19 PM

CURRENTLY: My nephew has been put in DHS custody and is currently admitted into a mental institution for treatment for attempting suicide among other issues. The girls are in foster care and just recently got placed with a family where they will be kept together. My sister is under heavy medication being without any of her children. I'm actually doing very well for myself and kids. Only by the grace and mercy of GOD can I really say this. I am so grateful for every response made and I will keep posted on each turn of events. I can honestly say that the support I have received dramatically influenced the decisions I had to make. GOD BLESS every one of you who took the time to care enough to show it. B2Blessed2bStressed

stillhoping4justice · Sep 29, 2006, 05:09 PM

Is there a family member without children that can take temporary or a guardianship and then seek help so as the other children are safe but he gets help? This way he is removed from harming the other children so DSS should not have a problem wihen the safety of the other children is being taken care of. Then the guardian can admit him to a facilty that can work with him.
Just wondering? I have only personal experiences with DSS on other matters involving my children and stories from other parents. But, I will tell you what my social worker told me about my abusive ex- and our children that if I had reported the abuse on them prior to leaving him and getting protective orders they probably would not have taken them out of the home or removed him just sought services. I waited so long to get help for fear of losing my children that in the end the children are now suffering. See if guardianship is an option.

stillhoping4justice · Sep 29, 2006, 05:15 PM

I missed a message. I am glad he is getting help and God bless you and your family. Let your sister know that those girls will always be hers because they are connected in their hearts. A light will be at the end of the tunnel. Tell her to hang in there. She is lucky to have you as a sister.

marshbog7 · Oct 18, 2006, 07:32 AM

I really don't understand, sorry but I am only 18 now.

What is a teen molester? Someone that molests teens? Or is he a teen himself?

What has he done to be a teen molester? What is molest to you?

Is he molesting when he tries it on with a girl? Or is he just hyperactive?

Is he sexually confused? Or at that age where he is aroused by everything due to his hormones?

Now I'm not intellectually challenged I do know what a molester is, but when it refers to someone else such as him... im trying to say How is he a teen moleseter?? :confused:

Vicky_27 · Oct 19, 2006, 06:06 AM

You need to read through all the posts regrding this and it will give you all the answers you need. Its an extremely complicated problem. Read through all of this and you will understand.

applelonia · May 27, 2007, 10:32 PM

Hello everyone, I know it has been so long since I posted anything concerning this situation. Well, since we turned my nephew in to authorities our whole lives have been turned upside down. The detective on the case investigating this situation had snatched my nieces from daycare and put them in a fostercare home. My sis has since gotten them back through the court system. Completing all of her classes and drug tests. We just went to court for this May 24, so it is still ongoing. My nephew has been to counseling which has left him with numerous medications that don't address the issues he's got. My family has had to have him placed from house to house without any stability because he has been ordered not to be in the home of any children under 13yrs. So that makes it difficult for us to find him placement for a long period. The detective on this case also filed felony child neglect charges on me for allowing my nephew to be at my home before we knew about this situation. Saying that I put my children in harms way, even though I'm the one who turned him in after I found out. The detective says that I did not keep in contact with her so she would get my attention by filing criminal charges on me. I did return all of her messages but she never returned mine, she says that she never got any of my messages. This charge was filed Feb. of this year and I went to jail with a $10,000 bond. I'm currently going to court on this. My next court is at the end of June. I can honestly say that me turning my nephew in has hurt our family more than helped, because now he's off doing whatever without his mother at all. He's not around his sisters anymore but he's not being cared for properly either due to the standards of D.H.S. I can only leave this in GOD's hands to work out because I am not able to do anything. GOD bless you all.:o

Lacey5765 · May 28, 2007, 09:04 AM

Did your nephew get a psychiatric eval? HE should have been placed in a program for sexually reactive youth. Usually the program is a year long and would require him to remain in a residential program (away from home). I am sorry that your family has had to go through such much. I hope he gets the help he needs and you can someday feel it was worth the pain you are going through. Hopefully it will prevent others from being abused and keeping the cycle going.

applelonia · May 28, 2007, 09:14 AM

My nephew was put into a mental institution for 3wks but was released. I'm not sure what they did for him there but I know he's not doing anything with himself right now. The doctor he sees now takes him in the office and less then 5 minutes later we are filling a prescription. This has been a failed mission without any success. I constantly pray for us, since that seems the only route to go.:o

Lacey5765 · May 28, 2007, 09:51 AM

I am sorry because I am not aware of the resources in your state. Perhaps you can look online for programs specifically for youth with this problem. I know in NC we have a few residential programs for this purpose. DId he indeed reveal that he was also molested? Medication alone is not enough. Can you look for other services. You can start by looking at the Division for Mental Health and finding a site near you. Let me know if I can be of any help.