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LolaP · Nov 11, 2008, 06:52 AM

My daughter is 14 and I struggle every morning of the week getting her out of bed for school. I have made her go to bed earlier to no avail. Have made her set alarm clock and if she does not get up on her own I wait until she does and she is tardy for school still doesn't help. I am ready to scream!! Any suggestions?

fisha002 · Nov 11, 2008, 07:42 AM

Try giving her a reason to get out of bed. You may think she is a little old but maby something like a reword hope it helps.

KISS · Nov 11, 2008, 08:24 AM

I have/had that problem too. Although I haven't fixed it completely, there are a number of causes for me: dark, migraines, migraine meds, asthma, allergies and the room being cold.

As the asthma got better and as the allergy season disapears, the better I am able to get out of bed. The differences here are small, but measureable.

Bumping up the programmable tstat makes it easy too. The electric blanket is on a timer as well.

But, I believe the largest improvement will come if I invest in a Dawn Simulator. Although I haven't been diagnosed with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder), it is used as a treatment. It simulates the sunrise and sunset at any time desired.

I notice that I wake up when it's light out, but the shades continue to make the room dark and I' m hesitent to wake up.

And your right, going to bed early doesn't really help.

Capuchin · Nov 11, 2008, 08:29 AM

Originally Posted by KeepItSimpleStupid

I have/had that problem too. Although I haven't fixed it completely, there are a number of causes for me: dark, migraines, migraine meds, asthma, allergies and the room being cold.

As the asthma got better and as the allergy season disapears, the better I am able to get out of bed. The differences here are small, but measureable.

Bumping up the programmable tstat makes it easy too. The electric blanket is on a timer as well.

But, I believe the largest improvement will come if I invest in a Dawn Simulator. Although I havn't been diagnosed with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder), it is used as a treatment. It simulates the sunrise and sunset at any time desired.

I notice that I wake up when it's light out, but the shades continue to make the room dark and I' m hesitent to wake up.

And your right, going to bed early doesn't really help.

Great suggestions, but maybe the girl is just being a teenager? I know that I sure as hell didn't want to get out of bed and go to school every day when I was 14.

KBC · Nov 11, 2008, 08:44 AM

Either positive or negative enforcement.

My brother wouldn't wake up and Mother would throw cold water on him,took about 2 times for this to take effect,worked though!! :)

Positive enforcement seldom comes too much if the child is being stubborn or lazy though.

Don't fret the small stuff and find a boundary for yourself.

This is a neat site to look into for you own sanity... hope it helps.

Setting Personal Boundaries - protecting self

KBC

sylvan_1998 · Nov 13, 2008, 07:42 AM

I think I would discuss with doctor. I was the same way and could sleep for 4 days straight. Anyway, I have narcolepsy. There are medications out there for this disorder but I chose to control with behavior medications. Sometimes knowing the reason is enough.

A sleep study might really help!

Good luck!

NowWhat · Nov 13, 2008, 09:06 AM

I always had a hard time getting up as a teenager. I drove my mom crazy.
What really worked for me is putting the alarm across the room, to where I would have to get up - out of bed to turn it off.

I tell my daughter, who is not really motivated in the morning, that she will NOT be late for school - even if that means going in her pj's. The thought of that alone - gets her going.

Is this a new problem or has she always been like this.
If so, a sleep study test isn't a bad idea.

liz28 · Nov 13, 2008, 03:00 PM

I'd this problem with my 8 year old daughter when it's time for school but on the weekends she won't wake up early.

To wake her up I brought an old fashion alarm clock from avon and the bell would ring when the alarm went off. That thing is so loud that my downstairs neighbor can hear it. That does the trick and I put it on her nightstand by her bed.

Before this I used to wet a wash cloth with cold water and put it on my daughter's face that worked too.

simoneaugie · Nov 13, 2008, 03:12 PM

Is she going to sleep when you send her to bed earlier? I was a witch that only my mom had the courage to wake up. But then I'd only been asleep for 3-4 hours when awakened for school.

How much sleep is she really getting? Teens experience a two hour sleep schedule change. They can be wide awake when the sun goes down. Naps during the day really screw up sleep schedules.

ikryspy · Nov 13, 2008, 03:30 PM

Try light punishments. Like if she's late for school she's not aloud to hang out with friends,go on the computer, or talk on the phone. Kind of like when you stay home sick your parents never let you do anything after you were "feeling better"

Fr_Chuck · Nov 13, 2008, 03:33 PM

I had trouble with my boys from time to time, and yes what I found that worked, I would call them once, if they did not get up, I walked in with a picture of water, and splash,

It only took once on all but one and he took twice but they started getting up real fast after that.

smejohnson · Nov 13, 2008, 05:25 PM

Try getting in bed with her and snuggling and coaxing her awake. She might like being woken a little less forcefully and might be in a much better mood (not just then, but for the rest of the day), or on the flip side, might just get up to avoid her "mommy" getting in bed with her.

sylvan_1998 · Nov 14, 2008, 07:01 AM

These are all good suggestions. And if they work out wonderful. But I caution, if she is getting enough sleep and is still not able to wake up, it may not be a choice but a symptom that something else is going on. If you can fix it, (apnea with a cpap machine, etc) it would be so much better than the brute force approach. However if it is a choice and she is being beligerant... all is fair!!

jennifer ellen · Nov 14, 2008, 07:15 AM

I was also the same at that age probably up to the age of 16.
My mum went through everything but got to the point of every morning she would open my curtains so the light would come in turn on the light if it was still dark outside removed my duvet from me and put it out the room sooo annoying and stuck on my music loud enough that I couldn't get back to sleep.
It was sooooooooo annoying but it worked.

She also did light punishments like took the things off me I loved the most music mobile TV in bedroom was all taken away unitil I learnt that I had to give and not just receive.

It might take 2-3 days for her to realise you are not going to give up on this routine but trust me she will learn to get up because it will start to annoy her every morning the curtains are open her music is to loud and she has no duvet.

Mum also used to squirt water at us to get up haha with all the above followed.

Good luck

jennifer ellen · Nov 14, 2008, 07:18 AM

I'm sorry but all teenage girls are moody stroppy and the rest at that age so getting into bed for a cuddle will not change anything.

starbuck8 · Nov 15, 2008, 10:18 PM

I really think this is a matter of a teen that is lazy in the morning, and just just wants to pull over the covers, and stay sleeping. She needs to have consequences. You need to start taking things away each time she doesn't get up, and is late for school.

Start with her music maybe. An I-pod or whatever she has that is important. Wait until she's gone and just take it and put it somewhere under lock and key. The next time, maybe she loses computer privledges, TV privileges, maybe loses her cell phone if she has one.

If she still doesn't want to get up, then she loses one thing at a time, until it comes down to even taking her door off the hinges, so she has no privacy.

I'm pretty sure she'll get the idea, if it comes down to that. You can do this for other things too! Show her who's the boss, and who pays for her food and shelter... and her little extra's. They are privileges, and not a requirement.

I bet if you started to take away her clothes, one outfit at a time, starting with her fave, every time she didn't get up in the morn, she would get that message really quick too. ;)

lrgarrett · Nov 15, 2008, 10:25 PM

My dad always used the good old fashion butt whooping threat... that we knew we would get if we missed the bus!

tricef52 · Nov 15, 2008, 11:15 PM

Originally Posted by LolaP

My daughter is 14 and I struggle every morning of the week getting her out of bed for school. I have made her go to bed earlier to no avail. Have made her set alarm clock and if she does not get up on her own I wait until she does and she is tardy for school still doesnt help. I am ready to scream!!! any suggestions??

You are the mom and she is the child. You have to set firm limits and stick to them. I had a teen like this and that is exactly what I did and he was never late more than once. There was zero tolerance or all privileges were taken away and I mean all of them because if you don't make it to school you can't go anywhere or listen, talk, or walk outside of this door. And I did not care what they said or cried. I was still the mom. That was exactly what I was put here to be. Most teens want their friends and if you cut them off they can't stand that.

mhughes · Nov 17, 2008, 07:45 PM

What I started to do was to let my daughter know, if she does not get up. She will not go to the PARTY of the year or hang out with her friends.