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    red_in_love's Avatar
    red_in_love Posts: 18, Reputation: 3
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    #1

    Oct 14, 2008, 03:43 PM
    I don't know what to do about my relationship
    Me and my boyfriend haven't been together that long but I really feel like I love him... I've been in love and had my heart broken but this relationship feels even better than the first one... I moved out of my house and into an apartment so we could spend more time together and for a while it was going great I was staying at his house with his mom, brother, and sister, and he would come over every once and a while to my apartment and stay there... then all of a sudden his mom moves them about 30 minutes away... which isn't too bad but when you have to pay rent and buy groceries and be a full time student its hard to keep up the money for gas to drive over there... then his mom says that he can't stay at my apartment any more and I can only come over one day a week... I really don't know why she is doing this he says its because she can't keep a relationship and she is jealous... but I really can't take not seeing him and having him beside me every night like it was for about 5 months straight... I don't know what to do because I really love him but I cry myself to sleep a lot and he says that he wants to move in with me but he can't afford it because his mom will cut him off from everything... I dn't know what to do... I have a lot of trouble sleeping even the one night a week I get to stay with him... help me!
    High Max's Avatar
    High Max Posts: 271, Reputation: 43
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    #2

    Oct 14, 2008, 03:51 PM

    How old are you both?
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #3

    Oct 14, 2008, 04:11 PM

    While age is needed, the dependacy you have on him is not healthy. You need to realize that in life all you need is yourself. Having a companion is fine, but someone that you make the center of your world is only going to end in disaster.
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
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    #4

    Oct 14, 2008, 04:48 PM

    Oh my, please be careful. Do not be this boy's surrogate mother. If he can't/won't stand on his own and must rely on his mother for support, him moving out will REQUIRE you to take on that role.

    That's not your idea of a perfect live-in boyfriend, is it? A guy you're taking care of because he can't do it himself?

    This is a dangerous moment for you. Make sure you are clear with yourself what it is you need most. A warm body in your bed isn't your TOP priority, is it? Please, please, please tread carefully here.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Oct 15, 2008, 10:25 AM

    You could both have what you want, if you were mature and independent enough to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES!!
    red_in_love's Avatar
    red_in_love Posts: 18, Reputation: 3
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    #6

    Oct 17, 2008, 11:47 AM

    We are both 20... and its not that he doesn't want to move out it is that he doesn't feel he can support us because he just got a job... and you are asking like he is a bad guy when its his mom that is being the... and I don't makk him the center of my world I go out and do things with my friends all the time it was the fact that we were going to sleep beside each other everyday for about 5 months straight and then all of a sudden he is gone and its really hard for me to sleep because before I met him I used to take pills to go to sleep and he made everything better I could stop taking the pills and go to sleep fine... I think some of the sleep thing is that I'm stressed out to with school and work... idk
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Oct 17, 2008, 02:04 PM
    Being that dependent on others, is not a good sign of being mature, and you can blame anyone you want on your own shortcomings, but that doesn't change a thing.

    I never said your b/f is a bad guy, because your both two kids trying to be adults, because you still need others to take care of you, so you must play by their rules, b......h or not.
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