[Dragonfly1234]

Hi everyone, I have been with my husband for several years and we have custody of his son from a previous relationship. The child went from being a toddler to a pre-teen and for the past few years we've talked about having more children. We both agree we want more children but we can't seem to make up our minds as to when. It seems there is always a reason why we should wait another year. I know that most people will say that there will always be a reason to wait but my question is, if you are indecisive, is that an indication to keep waiting? I'd like to hear from other mothers, did you feel you were ready even if you had some doubts? Did you quiet those doubts or did you wait until you were 100% sure that now was the time? Will we ever be 100% sure or will we always be a bit hesitant to go for it?

[DoulaLC]

I was 100% sure with the first two, went back and forth with the third then just threw caution to the wind and let fate take over, went back and forth again with a fourth... decided to stop with three, but was pleasently surprised (after the initial shock) with the fourth when the decision ended up not being our's to make... :)

You are correct, there often will be some reason or another that you can come up with as to why you should wait, but I guess you will have to determine how major those reasons really are.

Most people find things have a way of working out, and while they may change a few aspects perhaps about when a pregnancy came about, they wouldn't trade it for anything. Once you become pregnant, you have quite a bit of time to get used to the idea as well... :)

[ang8318]

I was never 100% ready. My husband and I wanted children very badly, but like you, came up with many excuses why we weren't ready... we needed a bigger house, to pay off our car, to get healthier and quit smoking... then we quit smoking, got heathier, paid off debt, and bought a new house. We then found other little reasons not, then one night, we just decided to let things happen, I quit taking my pill... although we still had doubts, we now have a nine month old son who we can not imagine our life without, and I am so glad that we just decided to let things happen because I have the best thing ever sleeping in a room down the hall... no doubt about that!!

[Alty]

I always new I'd have kids, there was no doubt about that. We waited until we were married for 2 years and then started trying.

I was unsure, like ang8318 said, there was always a reason, house, car, debt, work, you have it. It took 7 months and I finally got pregnant. I was uneasy, about foolish things. Not being able to go out whenever we wanted, not having parties at our hourse, or going to other parties. Changing my house, changing my entire lifestyle.

That all changed the moment I felt my son kick for the first time. He's 10 now, and I have a 6 year old daughter and lost one child to miscarriage. I love being a mom, it's the best thing I've ever done. No regrets. :)

[Dragonfly1234]

Thanks, that's exactly the kind of stories I was looking for.