Check out some similar questions!

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 01:07 AM

Hi,

Maybe this is a very stupid question, but I really need help on this one. We are trying for a baby, and have been having sex everyday!! But still I end up getting my periods. Even after sex, I raise my legs up as some people say but what I would like to know is that when my husbands comes into me and then while he is about to remove after we finish, some sperms just drip down. Now is it because of that, I'm not getting pregnant ? Or does is come out for everyone ? Are there any other tips to get pregnant??

maria06 · Sep 13, 2008, 06:10 AM

This is very normal -its just gravity.

Try putting a pillow under your bottom!

Also no need to have sex every day when trying -you get pretty tired and sore! Try and work out your fertile time and have sex around then. Don't worry -it will happen just give it time.

DoulaLC · Sep 13, 2008, 09:55 AM

It comes out for everyone... rest assured, plenty will be placed at the cervix during intercourse. As Maria mentioned, some people like the extra insurance of staying lying down for a bit with a pillow under their bottom.
How long have you been trying for? It can take a year or so for many couples and that can be perfectly normal. If after a year and still no success, check with your doctor about having some initial testing for both of you. In the meantime, take care of yourselves, make any changes in your lifestyle that you know would be healthy.

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 10:15 AM

Thanks so much. Just been married for two months and trying :-) I guess I'm expecting it to happen fast... But are there any tips or something that we should try??

ChristinaSuzann · Sep 13, 2008, 10:21 AM

Believe it or not but some abstenance will increase your chances of becoming pregnant. Try to have intercourse more frequently 5 to 15 days after your menstral cycle as this is when most women ovulate. Putting your legs in the air etc are all myths when your husband ejaculated inside of you his sperm will get to where it needs to go without arobics... smiles...
And yes it is normal for his seaman to drip out of you

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 10:23 AM

Since we married for 2months now, we have been having intercourse every night.. sometimes even twice - thrice... Its only when I have my periods we don't... otherwise everyday :-p

J_9 · Sep 13, 2008, 10:33 AM

Having sex as often as you are can actually cause you NOT to become pregnant. Why you ask? Because having sex too often lowers the sperm count. It takes as long as 48 hours to build up a good sperm count. So, sex every other day is better than every day.

Now, you have only been trying for 2 months, it takes the average healthy couple as long as a year of actively trying to become pregnant.

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 10:36 AM

Thanks for that info... Didn't know that...

J_9 · Sep 13, 2008, 10:38 AM

Many women don't know that. LOL

I have learned this in my nursing school and subsequent nursing career in women's health.

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 10:53 AM

Ok, are there any valuable tips that you can give??

J_9 · Sep 13, 2008, 11:06 AM

Sure...

Know your cycle. Know it well.

Treat yourself now as if you are pregnant. Start taking prenatal vitamins now to prevent neural tube defects. These defects present themselves most times before the woman even knows she is pregnant.

Get a pre-pregnancy check up with your OB/GYN

Also, you have only been married 2 months. Don't be in such a hurry to change your life this drastically this early in your marriage. Get to know each other as husband and wife first.

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 11:11 AM

We have known each other for the last 3 years... ours was a love marriage... so I guess we both want a baby asap...

I got my periods ysday so my 14 day would be 25 sept... so when should we do it and which days would be the best? Also how soon can I know if I've conceived??

DoulaLC · Sep 13, 2008, 11:18 AM

As J_9 mentioned, every other day is fine... you may want to keep the every day for just several days prior to when you think you might be ovulating.

Count will go down, but unless there is an issue with sperm count to begin with, the benefit of "fresher" healthier sperm may outweigh the decrease in numbers. Some reproductive endocrinologists now believe that when you consider how many sperm are present in the average ejaculation and then take out the numbers that are misshaped, damaged, or lack a sense of direction and die off in the vagina, the number go down from there of ones that are capable of doing the job. However, the numbers are still quite high and adequate for the average couple and frequent sex around the time of ovulation can increase the odds that the sperm that are present are less damaged. In a round about way, you may have fewer numbers all together, but increase the numbers of the ones that are of better quality.

There are a number of ways to get an idea of when you are most likely ovulating... some ways work better for some women and others for other women. Temping and charting, ovulation predictor kits, checking cervical position, watching for changes in cervical discharge... all can give you an idea when you might be ovulating. While they don't let you know for sure, they will give you a good starting place. As ChristinaSuzann mentioned, starting to try before the normal recommendation of 14 days into your cycle is wise as many women do not ovulate midcycle. I know if I adhered to that I would never had gotten pregnant with my children as I tend to ovulate earlier than the norm. General rule of thumb is ovulation is likely about 12-16 days before your next period is due... but it would be a good idea to start trying several days sooner than this and a few days later and adjust it to when you determine ovulation is likely for you... of course if you are having sex every other day, with perhaps a few more sessions when you think ovulation is likely, you will cover your bases.

There is more to it than just good timing however, this is why it can take quite a bit of time even with watching for ovulation signs and having intercourse on a regular basis.

Another good idea would be to see your doctor for a preconception visit to go over your general health and ways you and your husband can both improve your odds.

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 11:21 AM

Really appreciate all the help!!

J_9 · Sep 13, 2008, 11:22 AM

Not all women ovulate on day 14. Even with a 28 day cycle.

I understand yours was a love marriage, that is the only marriage I believe in personally. However, being husband and wife is a life changing event. Going from boyfriend & girlfriend to husband and wife is a drastic change. Take time to learn each other as husband and wife. There are things you will learn about him, and him about you, that you did not know when you were not married. Take time to learn.

Now, back to ovulation. Once you ovulate, the egg only is viable for fertilization for 24 hours. However, a man's sperm can live inside you for up to 5 days. So you can begin to have sex prior to ovulation.

As far as knowing when you conceived. This is as individual as you and I are. Some women instinctively know exactly when they conceived, yet others have to wait for a missed period or other symptoms to appear. The missed period is the usual first sign that pregnancy has occurred.

rrimz · Sep 13, 2008, 11:26 AM

One last question, my flow is pretty good and ysday when I got my periods, the flow was normal but today, it was much less compare to ysday ! Any particular reason for this? Or should I just wait till tmrw and see how the flow is ?

J_9 · Sep 13, 2008, 11:27 AM

No particular reason for it. It happens sometimes.

DoulaLC · Sep 13, 2008, 11:37 AM

Originally Posted by rrimz

We have known each other for the last 3 years ... ours was a love marriage... so i guess we both want a baby asap ....

I got my periods ysday so my 14 day would be 25 sept ... so when should we do it and which days would be the best ?? also how soon can i know if ive conceived ????

Personally, I would just start having sex the day after your period ends and continue on a fairly regular basis from there. You might skip a day here or there, you may have a few now and then where you have sex two days in a row. Every other day will be sufficient... if you are in the mood and you had sex the day before, enjoy yourselves anyway. The point is, it doesn't have to be everyday, but you just don't want too many days between either... so find a happy medium that works for you and your husband.
You don't want your sex life to become over regulated or a chore.

As far as when to know if you conceived... often about 2 weeks after you suspect ovulation you will possibly get an accurate result on a pregnancy test. Good idea, however, to just wait and see what happens each month when your period is due. It is frustrating at times, I know, when you are really wanting it to happen and it seems like it just isn't. Use the time to focus on taking care of yourselves, making good changes in your lives... eating well, exercising on a regular basis, etc. learning about pregnancy so that when it does happen you will be in a very good position to have a healthy pregnancy... good luck!