[plzhelpme123]

K here's the deal, my man and I live together and are expecting our first baby in 5 weeks he has also put a ring on my finger. The other day my man left his hotmail on without logging off so I took a look on it and found that he was talking to this chick about hooking up. She had msged her phone number so I decided to give her a call. As I was on the phone with her I found out that she had lots of clients and she didn't know my man. She was really nice and concerned after I told her I was pregnant. As I was on the phone wit her she told me to hold on. She had someone at the door, she asked who it was and he told her his name and by my surprise it was my mans name, she then said to him `` here the phones for u`` she pasted the phone to him and it was my man and he said HI and I was like HELLO. He realized it was me and hung up. I called his cell phone right after and he said that he would be home right away. When he got home he told me that he wasn't going there for himself, that he was going there just to drop off money for his friends cousin and that he had did it because his friend didn't want to get caught by his girlfriend who had his password for his email. So I'm so fricken confused if I should believe him. We have talked and kind of worked thing out but I still think he is lying. What should I do. I still have questions to ask him but he doesn't want to bring it up again but its all I can think about. I need advise so help me.

Thanks

[CURIOUS08]

I personally think he's lying... You saw the hotmail with your own eyes... Doesn't seem like he was doing it for a cousin and if so, why didn't he get the info from the cousin... why was he messaging the girl?

[Romefalls19]

Call up his cousin and ask... If nothing happens then end it. Communication is key in relationships

[lmangileri]

Hmmm... as awkward as that sounds he could be telling you the truth. You should ask him who the friend's cousin is and ask him. That's really not cool though that the friend's cousin would be sending your boyfriend over there to pay her though. Wouldn't he care that he could get caught going over there by you? Another thing to think about though is if he was going to see some prostitute for himself wouldn't he make sure to close out his email so you wouldn't see? You would think he would be very careful if he was going over there for himself. I can't tell you one way or another if he's telling the truth or not but it sounds to me like you should do a little more investigating to be sure.

[CURIOUS08]

I'm done with giving people the benefit of the doubt... She saw on the email that the guy was talking about hooking up... What does hooking up mean exactly? Getting together... or making out? Either way, something sounds off and I would ask him... but still... if there was nothing wrong with what he was doing, he would have told you off the bat.

[plzhelpme123]

If it was for him. What should I do. I have put my whole life pretty much in his hands and got so much to lose if it is true. We got a baby on the way and if it is true I don't know what to do. I don't want to be with someone who is going to cheat on me.

[lmangileri]

For now just worry about talking to him to find out if it is true. Do you have family or friends you can stay with if it is?

[plzhelpme123]

Well there is no way he will admit it if its true. I do have places I could stay but I want him to be there as a daddy for our son. If I leave he won't be.

[Romefalls19]

So now you're telling me communication in relationships isn't a must? Hmm... interesting, I would put money on the fact everyone else would disagree with you. Don't talk to your spouse about anything, let me know how that works out for you. I'll be sure to see you back here soon

[talaniman]

Rome is right, communication is the key, and your asking the wrong questions. Why would he feel like going to a prostitute, and cheating on you? Of course he is lying, and why not.

What better way to avoid the truth, and consequences of his actions. So I guess you haven't worked things out at all. Just buried them for the time being.

My advice is the same as Romes, which you don't want to hear, call the cousin. and get to the bottom of this. You both have some talking to do. (communications) and your right, a lot of us say the same thing, because it happens to be true, whether you like it or not!

[plzhelpme123]

K first of all sorry rome all I saw was his quote I didn't c his actual message to me so I apoligize. Now that I have read it. It is good advise. I'm not all here with fricken hormones and stress. I don't know how to get ahold of this cousin but when there is a will there is a way right.

[kpita]

Hooray for the hooker, she just saved you a lifetime of misery. If you believe he is lying, he probably is. Can you trust him now? A relationship with no trust isn't worth having. Why wouldn't he be in your child's life if you moved? What kind of man abandons a child just because a relationship didn't work. Before you make any decissions know what you are getting into. It might be hard at first, rely on friends, and move on.

[Romefalls19]

I forgive... I don't take offense, just don't want you to make a hasty decision without finding out the facts. I'm not saying you should trust him, but at least try to ask the cousin. Tell him to call this family member in front of you, shouldn't be such a big deal if he wants to keep you around. If he refuses, then it's the final red flag I would take

[plzhelpme123]

He did call his friend when I was right there but he could have called and made him say what he said before that. He told me at first that he was doing it 4 his friend then it was for his friends cousin. He said that the day before his friend stopped by and gave him the money but his story just doesn't make sense. I ed up thing is that I called this chick and he showed up when I was on the phone with him. He told his friend on the phone that he was going to keep the money because he almost ruined his relationship. He got a phone call like five minutes later and I heard his friend say ``my cousin says he is sorry and he can keep the money`` but I have so many more questions for my man and his friend. I just don't know how to bring it up again without him getting upset. It all I think about when I get up and all day and then I can't sleep at night. I don't even want to touch him. I feel like I should go get checked out again cause if he has cheated he might have gave me something and I don't want it to hurt my unborn baby.

[Ivory0921]

That sucks, especially in your situation. I think he is lying about it. Many guys have that same old excuse of "Umm... She wasn't for me, she's for a friend's, brother's cousin.." Or something like that. Like duh, right? Anyway, quietly get to the bottom of this by getting in touch with the cousin, although odds are he might have already tipped his cousin off by now. I have to give him credit for coming up with that story tough. I almost believed him.:eek: Nonetheless, since you two are having a baby, after you get to the bottom of all this, then make a decision you can live with and would be good for you and your kid.

[plzhelpme123]

My man tells me not to be snopping around and that if I want to know something just to ask him but I can't get the answers I want by doing that. I hate fighting with him cause I don't want to go into premature labour or anything but I can't continue living with this.

[hjpan]

Call up the cousin for Confirmation.

Story matches up... stay with him~
story doesn't match up... leave him

[Ivory0921]

If you can't snoop around no more then just accept his explanation and forget the whole thing.

[plzhelpme123]

Oh I really want find out the whole truth. This is eating me up inside. I could call his friend and talk to him one on one but I know if I do my man will get upset but I need to know his side of story with out my man around. What do you think if I do go behind his back.

[Queen_864]

He Did It.

By You Calling Him On The Phone And Waiting For Him To Get Home Instead Of Discussing It Right Then And There You Gave Him Time To Develop An Excuse Which Any Man Would Develop In A Given Amount Of Time..

Look At The Evidence. His Hot mail. Her number. Her House. He Was There. And If He Was Paying For Someone Else Wouldn't The Cousin Have Called The Trick To Let Her Know. And I'm Pretty Sure Tricking Is Not A Lay Away Plan It's Pay Then And There...

Think About It.