[hollylovesbrandon]

Hello. I am a 22 year old women. I am married and live in a house with my husband and our two roommates (2 of my husband and I's best friends). After high school my husband and I and our roommates moved about 6 hours away from all of our friends and all of their families (except my dad who we moved closer to). I work a full-time job and I am off on tuesday's and wednesday's.

Well, now that you have a little bit of background. Here is my problem. All of my friends are back in Kentucky where I am from. I barely get to talk to them or hear from them. I don't have the money or the time to go visit them... and it's the same for them. I am having such a hard time finding new friends and social circles. I am unlike most 22 year old's. I don't drink. I don't do the party or the club scene thing. I also have no children. I feel that I have nothing to talk to most people my age about. My work is filled with people a lot older than I am. My closest friend at work is 42 and has children my age, just for an example.

Does anyone have any ideas on how I can meet new people my age to hang out with? I love my husband and we are best friends. We have a wonderful relationship and I couldn't imagine it being any more perfect. The only problem is that I think that since I don't really have any friends to hang out with that I end up spending all my time with him. I think it will eventually make our relationship suffer. I tell him that I think I depend too much on him for my happiness since I have no friends to go hang out with. He says I'm crazy but I do know that if we continue to spend every minute together we will end up fighting because we will get on each others nerves.

I just think that since I am young and have no kids it should be easier for me to meet people. I want to hang out with my girlfriends again like I used to. I miss having the girls night out. Please someone, help me.

[hamworld05]

I don't know how "free" you are, regarding friends. But if you have enough "hobby time", why not just hang here in AMHD? We're, for the most part, a solid bunch, and you "might" be able to hang with us at work. It would feel good helping people out with their issues and being helped out with your issues or , just chatting with us, I believe.

If you're not into this way of making buddies, why not start a hobby you can really get into? There has to be something you can get passionate about and chat about with people. I believe it'd feel good to find people that share your passion/hobby. A very worthy hobby, in my humble opinion is chess.

I know the first way isn't exactly "meeting people". This however, doesn't make you face people and get any discomfort from doing so. An important hint to your "social aptitude" is

I feel that I have nothing to talk to most people my age about.

. Just something for you to consider.

I don't believe not having any friends is an excuse for any relationship problems. If your relationship gets pretty rocky(hopefully, it hasn't), I suggest seeing a counselor.

I hope this helps.

I feel like Yoda, for some odd reason.

[hollylovesbrandon]

My relationship has not struggled. But I feel that if I continue to spend all my time with him that it might. You know what I mean? Anyway, I cannot be on a computer at work. I do hard labor everyday and most days am too tired to do anything after work. I would have to have a hobby on my days off. Plus, I do not know how to play chess. I do enjoy outdoorsey type things like the park and stuff.

[hamworld05]

I feel completely stupid. I didn't see your title as a full member(was it yellow while I was typing?

... Right. You're not completely alone, so as a comfort, why not just continue to hang with us? We're a very open bunch(that is, I'd bet you'd find something to talk about with us).

This, as stated(albeit for someone that isn't you), won't make you have to meet anyone and get any discomfort from it.

A lot of the major points I state however, are stated with the assumption that you are not that social. So, if I'm wrong with this assumption, kindly let me know.

[adam_89]

Just wondering where about Indiana you are? You look familiar and are close to my age. I was just wondering?

[hamworld05]

What the heck kind of hard labour do you do? Gosh, this shouldn't be so. You shouldn't be too tired to do anything, let alone have a hobby. Maybe you're working too long/hard.

[Wondergirl]

Volunteer a few hours a week at a hospital, library, nursing home, school, animal shelter. You will meet people of all ages, you will learn new skills, you will be contributing to your community, and you will have interesting things to talk about.

[hollylovesbrandon]

I would love to meet people where it doesn't involve work. I work so hard sometimes. The last thing I want to do is work more. Also, I just joined my husband's gym today. I'm hoping taking aerobic swimming classes will help me meet people.

[bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE]

Come to Massachusetts and I'll be your friend! I'm in the same position as you. This stinks!

[hollylovesbrandon]

It's good to know I'm not the only one. It just makes me feel kind of lonely sometimes. I hear all these people talking about girls night out and hangin out with their girls and stuff and I miss it. I want to have some girlfriends to relate to. I live in a house full of men and sometimes it just frustrates me sometimes.

[bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE]

I know how you feel hollylovesbrandon. Before I moved in with my significant other, I was always out with my girlfriends. Now I live in a town where I know no body. I find it hard to look for friends when I work 8:30-5:30 Monday through Friday. I have made maybe 3 friends but none that I have really hung out with.

[hollylovesbrandon]

Yeah, there was a girl my age that started at my work. I was so excited because we were gonne hang out and stuff. And then she just up and quits a week later and I didn't have her cell number or know where she lives so that ended quickly. I have a few friends from my old job but it seems that any time I make friends they are older than me. One of my friends is 35, has 2 kids and just had a heart attack. As I said before my closest friend at work is 42. I just feel like I am in elementary school again because I don't know how to make friends. In high school it was easy because you were around people your age and hangin out everyday. Now it's just so much harder.

[0rphan]

Hi Holly, it appears all this has happened since you moved house, is there any chance that you could move back... ok your jobs may be there, but you can always get other jobs.
If your only there to work,go to bed, get up, go to bed, with nothing outside of that monotony then I think you really have to find a way to change your situation.
Everyone is going to say... well our jobs are here etc.etc... but you have no quality of life.
At least think about it ,maybe put it to the others in your household,see what response comes back, who knows once they've given it some thought,they may agree to move,and thank you for bringing it to the fore.

In the mean time the gym idea is a good idea and will give you ample opportunity to meet new people.

Goodluck

[hollylovesbrandon]

There is no way we will ever move back. That was the worst place ever. I want to move somewhere else but no one else does. But also, I try to be content... or at least as content as possible. I'm happy with my life for the most part. I just wish I had a job that I didn't have to work so hard at. And I wish I had more friends. As far as where I live I do like it. And my husband and I have lots of fun together.

[SweetDee]

It's very hard sometimes to make new friends and I don't blame you for not wanting to volunteer to meet new people, after working so hard in your work. I suggest that you consider joining a tennis club, since you said you're outdoorsy. Any kind of fun activity that would be on the days that you are not working. You can take an afternoon class so you can maybe sleep in a bit on your day's off (lol!). Think about pottery or some kind of art class? Even a gym... Any class you take immediately you will be surrounded by people having the same thing in common. Before you register try and make sure, (by asking.. ) what the age group is that participates. Short of that, you can try meeting people at coffee shops. Just tell someone your age at the shop that you are relatively new in this state and would love to meet some people your age and gender, (since you're already happy w/ your man.. ). Even people your age that work in clothing stores... Be open and talk free about what you are looking for to everyone you meet. You can meet people by putting yourself out there... even in a shopping capacity. You just have to have the courage to open your mouth and let the words out... lol. YOU CAN DO IT! Let us know what happens, k? Xo

[hollylovesbrandon]

I appreciate the help. And I just wanted to let everyone know that my swimming aerobics class was a big bust. It was only me and 2 other ladies that were both over 60. Of course that was the first class though, there might be more in the future. And thak you to everyone for your suggestions. I think I might look for something like a pottery class. I've always wanted to try that anyway! And I will be sure to let you know what happens.

[frangipanis]

You could try meet ups where there's a huge range of interest groups all over the place.
Use the Internet to get off the Internet! - Meetup.com

Best wishes finding something of interest and friends in your age group :-)

[N0help4u]

I think it is becoming a common problem. Even here today yours is about the fourth I have no friends near where I live post I have read today.
All my friends live out of reach too. I think it is a common problem because many people any more stick to themselves and their work. I am not sure what you can do but you definitely are not alone.
When I am able to I go to festivals, flea markets, car cruises and whatever free stuff I can find to do but people still stick to themselves anyway.

[tsila1777]

And our two roommates (2 of my husband and I's best friends).

Hey Kentucky girl, I'm from around Corbin, Ky. So you have a friend in me.

Did you say you live with your husband and 2 of your best friends? Or am I understanding this wrong?

Can't you hang out with them?

Just curious?

Go Wildcats!

[hollylovesbrandon]

Yeah I live with my husband and 2 of his best friends. I mean, they are my friends too... but they are male and sometimes we just simply don't share the same interests. Plus, it just doesn't feel right to be hanging out with them without my husband and the whole point is to be without my husband. I mean, he doesn't care if I hang out with them, but it kind of bothers me a little. Anyway, I no longer live in Kentucky. I live in Indiana. Plus, even if I did live in Kentucky with my friends we wouldn't hang out probably. They have all got kids now and their lives have changed so much that we have nothing in common anymore except the love we share for each other and the times we USED to have. Last time I visited we spent time going over old times than we did making new times. I'm just so frustrated. I don't know what to do. Maybe I'm just not the kind of person that people find friendly, I have been told that actually.