[iferganed]

My name is Dylan. I was formly part of the United States Special Black Ops Forces. I have seen much death and it didn't bother me back them but now I can't sleep at night without thinking about them. I was involved in the end of vietnam, Berlin Wall, Cuban Missile Crisis, and many other great times. I have many other things to say but I may not because it would be treason for me to speak it since it is Classified Top Secret. I was ranked as a general when I retired and earned many rewards and medals such as the Purple Heart and I was spoke by the president at that time. Please Help me.

[Redhudd]

Well I don't know how to help you on that, But I Strongly suggest you see a doctor about seeing people who are dedicated to help you overcome this haunting.

[iferganed]

Thank you for your help I've tried therapists and doctors but it doesn't work

[Redhudd]

thank you for your help ive tried therapists and doctors but it doesnt work

Well I know that seeing someone die and also Killing someone can give you a image that could stay in your mind forever. It might help if you think Why you did this and what good it brought to you and your family, or friends.

I bow to you for protecting are states and take the risks you took.

[iferganed]

I killed because it was my mission although I've had over 300 men under my command and they are responsible for over 2300 enemy kills. But I wish I would have asked more questions of what I did...

... no need for you too bow I've done my share of protection as will other... I ask you to bow for the 13 soldiers I've lost in other missions..

Thank You Once Again

[simoneaugie]

PTSD can be approached this way. It works for me. A book named Focusing (can't remember the author) originally introduced me to the process. The mind is a funny thing when emotional memories are especially strong.

http://focusing/

[tsila1777]

Thank you for serving.

My husband was also in Vietnam, he was shot and had to leave the service on disability. He also killed a man, it was his job, he has no choice. He rarely has night terrors that wake him up.

He does not have PTSD, (I do, but that's a different story) but I do not allow my grandchildren to play with toy guns because if one is pointed at him, he does have a flashback. Even the word 'shot' upsets him. He refers to the shooting as 'the incident'.

There is no 'cure' for PTSD, but there are people trained to help you deal with it. I personally have to see a counselor, and take a prescription in order to deal with the night terrors, panic attacks, anxiety and sleeplessness. Although there are nights when I cannot stay in bed, and sit up all night. However, without the prescription, I would surely kill myself; because I cannot stand the anxiety or whatever that 'thing' that comes over me. I feel I cannot stay in this body; it is unbearable. I thank God for the help I have received.

I pray you find the help you need.

Blessings,

[iferganed]

Thank you for your help but honestly.. your husbands flash back is about one man.. my men killed over 2000

[tsila1777]

thank you for your help but honestly.. your husbands flash back is about one man.. my men killed over 2000

I'm sorry that was only one example... I suppose that mother's son didn't matter; his life was meaningless?

My husband's flashback is about getting shot in the face, but it went through his arm first, defensive move that may have saved his life.

Sorry, I can't help you.

Thanks to your men for serving this country and doing the job they signed up for.

I hope you find the help you need.

[Fr_Chuck]

In general we all have our demons so to speak to over come, and you can not down play a persons one person over your troops 2000, their one is as bad as 1000 if it is happening to you.

In general it is only that one or a few faces that end up haunting you anyway, But it is a soldiers job to follow orders, and in most cases they were not even considered human they were just an "enemy" the hardest was when one broke that rule of looking at their face in their eyes that make them more human to your mind, not just a target.

But what happens during the war and while in military, it is stlll just duty, it is not till later that you start having a real life outside of that world, that you mind starts trying to file things, deal with unresolved issueds and so on.

But you have a few choices, harden your life and should and go on, let it haunt you forever or learn to give up the pain that you can not change anyway. We have that face from the past, the dead that still haunts us years latter. You are not alone, and in some cases there is no real cure but by learning to talk about things you can help give up in the pain

[gavin2008]

I am having a tough time believing what I just read by Dylan. Former "Black Ops" members don't discuss their connection to that line of work and I also don't believe that any "General" would have such a tough time with written communication (i.e. simple grammar). I apologize if you are being sincere, but as a veteran with much experience, it just doesn't seem legitimate. Additionally, to downplay another's story or experience is not a common practice of a person with such experiences as the situations are all relative. "Your group" is also not referred to as the "United States Special Black Ops Forces". I also think you meant to say "awards" rather than "rewards" as military members don't receive "rewards" for their actions. If you refer to Black Operation - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia you will see that "The methods used in black operations are also used in unconventional warfare and includes actions like assassinations, espionage, sabotages, and supporting of resistance movements." This would not explain being a General in command of a unit that killed over 2000 people. That sounds like numbers an infantry division would put up. Although you cannot rely on Wikipedia for 100% accuracy, I believe this is an accurate description. Maybe if you go back to the therapists, you can see them for what you are rather than "what you've done". Once again, if you are speaking the truth, I apologize for my assumption and what you're dealing with.

[grasshopper08]

Dear "iferganed",

I highly suggest EMDR for post traumatic stress disorder as well as traditional "talk it out" therapy. Please refer to the website below:

EMDR Institute, Inc.

Good luck

[cornedbeef]

Hi,
I totally agree with gavin 2008. No ex serviceman of such a high rank would talk in this way and describe experiences using some of the terminology he did. I am convinced this is an attention seeker who insults those who have truly suffered for their cause.
This guy needs help with telling the truth first and foremost!

[excon]

Hello Dylan:

I don't know. You're not messed up worse than the lady's husband because he only killed ONE man, and you killed more...

In fact, that's probably your problem. It's really a matter of how you look at it. You DO need somebody to help you adjust your perspective, cause that's all it is.

I too worked for John F. Kennedy doing the things that protected our country. I would say that my efforts resulted in MANY, MANY dead enemy. I don't feel bad about it. In fact, I feel good about it. Not cause I killed people, but because MY guys lived, and if I didn't kill the bad guys, my guy's (or ME) might not have made it.

Thank God for me, and thank God for you.

excon

[Armygirl80]

Thank you very much for your service! I know it's frusterating the lack of help us Veterans get but there are resources out there. Check with your local VFW because they do have contacts who can get you hooked up with the right help:)

Spc. Cooper
OIF 06-08

[pfarhan]

Hello general . Its nice to read about you and your post. Am a service airforce engineer myself.. not from USAF, well what I suggest to you in this time.. is seek a link with God, one you don't have the black. Stip of duty, responsibility and bla bla bla on your eyes and mind. So now.. use your mind being neutral, meditate.. and if your heart has finally become wise to speak the truth to yourself. Make a link with God. There is nothing like your God or my God , therez only one God in this entire universe. Return towards him. And try helping humanity in anyway you can.. as it is the only source of earning peace. For a chance you have killed many and taken many lives. Now try helping people live. Even if its for oneday..
Feed a poor..
Help a needy..
Say a prayer for those who are in bad deeds..
And most of all. If you can. Raise a better humanbeing then yourself. In form of a child.. and make him learn to be wise. And wiser then being driven by just patriotism, nationalism and extremism.. make him a good human being for humanity. These are the only deeds that would earn you peace in this world and the world after . Dear general.

[ingrid119]

If this post isn't fake, I thank you with my heart and soul for what you have done for our country. The suggestion I have is that maybe you should go to a hypnotherapist. They can hypnotize you into rarely thinking about it (it can't make you never think about it but it would help substantially). You might still have some symptoms but if you go to a doctor or psychiatrist they can prescribe them for you.

[survivorboi]

You're very brave.

If PTSD is bothering you, you might want to check helplines, websites, forums, etc.

National Center for PTSD Home

For veterans...

I have one pointless question I want to ask you...

I watched some Vietnam war and other war movies... Do you think it's accurate? Since you're an experienced veteran, I'm interested in your opinion. How do those movies compare to the real thing?

Thanks =)

[STG]

I would ask that you stop attempting to impersonate a veteran and seek help through whatever civilian options you have. Your terminology is ALL wrong and you have terrible grammar and spelling skills. That said, you didn't serve with the unit you claim to have served with (since it doesn't exist) and you're claiming to be a military officer (which you were not).

- STG, former US Army commissioned officer