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signergirl · Jul 24, 2008, 01:29 PM

I feel AWFUL! I feel as though every time I go to hang out with a "friend" they all seem to stab me in the back! I always end up getting screwed in the end because I have a big heart and my "friends" always use this to get what they want! And I feel like my parents are always mad at me and my sister is acting like a brat and won't help around the house and I get in trouble when I get mad at her. I'll also be graduating this next year and my parents say that I will meet people who will be better friends and won't do that to me, but I just feel like that will happen my whole life! I need advice on what to do!
Signed,
Lonely

ylaira · Jul 24, 2008, 01:35 PM

Are you having a hard time to say NO?

signergirl · Jul 24, 2008, 01:38 PM

What do you mean? I you mean do I have trouble saying no to people then the answer is yes. I HATE telling people off and making them feel bad or putting them out and that's probably why they use me, but they shouldn't have to use me like that!!

ylaira · Jul 24, 2008, 01:44 PM

You teach people how to treat you. When they don't hear you refusing, people think its okay so they keep on doing what they are doing. Not everyone is sensitive enough to sense how are you feeling.

When mom is angry, reason out a bit so she will hear your side. Sister isn't doing her chore, don't do it. Just do your assigned chore. Let mom gets mad to her.

So my advice, when you don't like doing something VOICE IT OUT, SAY NO and KEEP UR WORD. It will be hard but learning to say NO is the KEY.

ylaira · Jul 24, 2008, 01:54 PM

I just saw it on OPRAH WINFREY SHOW, because she said she used to have that "disease". It takes her 5 minutes to explain why "she can't" in refusing. Sometimes people will ask her in the elevator "Do you remember me? I was on your show." She can't really rememebr and will just try to be genial. Also, week after week, a solicitation comes up on her table and even in one point, she spoke to a woman over the phone for 5 hours, trying to stop her (the woman) from suicide

signergirl · Jul 24, 2008, 01:56 PM

Yeh I guess and I also just lost my best friend to a huge argument that we had. Actually I lost two. One of my friends was dating a boy two years older than her and is in college. My friends were telling me he was dating a boy on the side and when I would tell her she would say I was lying to her, when she knows I wouldn't lie to her. Then she got heartbroken by this guy and came back to me and this other girl then took him right back!! Then my other best friend and her stopped talking and this girl went to another school and stared ignoring me completely and then my best friend since 6th grade and I stopped talking. It's been hard since then and I can't let that go either and so that's where my friend problems begin.

chiradeep · Sep 9, 2008, 06:16 AM

Hello Friend! Greetings!
I can understand what you r going through. The generation gap is creating problem at your home. About your friends, I would say keep good relationship and always think what you can give do not expect.

What gives you maximum pleasure:
1. Soccer, or any other sports...
2. Writing poems or diary or blog...
3. Any hobbies that gives you immense pleasure and satisfaction and keeps you busy...
4. Do you love to help others...do it then...
5. Do you like to visit old age homes, go and talk to the old people and be a friend to their loneliness....

Start doing something that I suggested above and you will find a meaning in your life. Your perspective will change. Enjoy your Loneliness...

Pray and start doing it... may God Bless you...