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    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #1

    Jul 21, 2008, 11:15 AM
    Modifying Child Custody
    My ex-husband and I finalized our divorce Jan 2007. Up until the divorce was finalized I have had full custody, for the divorce agreement we decided on joint custody/joint residence. My ex-husband loves his daughter and she loves him, she is now almost seven years old. My question is this: I do not want to modify his visitations, but we have not been able to make any decisions for our daughter together, even minor ones. This has caused my daughter to attend a school she we did not agree to for two weeks before we made it into court and I had her moved back to the approriate school. And most recently we agreed that she would spend every other week attending day camp this summer with her older brother (different father). After spending one week at day camp he has decided that she can no longer attend. He has not listed a valid reason for this but I think he is trying to prove time with her because he wants to drop/stop child support payments. My daughter has been heart broken over not being able to attend. We have tried mediation but he continues to make unilateral decisions and I feel lost trying to fight it. What are my options? I want for my daughter to be happy and I am afraid for her future as this continues. Do I stand a chance for modifying custody? We will never be able to make decision together and it seems like I am helpless fighting for her while he is only concerned with his own agendas.
    stinawords's Avatar
    stinawords Posts: 2,071, Reputation: 150
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    #2

    Jul 21, 2008, 11:43 AM
    Simple answer is that you will have to go back to court. I'm guessing that the two of you live in different school zones (if not districts) and as of now he has just as much right as you do as to what happens in her life. A change in this will have to be made in court you do have a chance at having it modified because she will be in school so that makes alternat weeks harder but remember that when he finds out that you are going back to court he could also file for having full custody.
    Justwantfair's Avatar
    Justwantfair Posts: 3,422, Reputation: 944
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    #3

    Jul 21, 2008, 12:08 PM
    I have no doubt that he will file for full custody and we will probably drop another $10,000.00 fighting again in court. We do live in different school zones, but she attends the elementary school for my physical address. We do not have joint parenting time. Just wanted to finalize the divorce after four and a half years so I could move on with my life. BIG MISTAKE. I filed a petition to modify child custody two days ago, but I am afraid I can't really afford the attorney (I will if I have to) and he can't either. I just want to feel like the judge will listen and that I have a leg to stand on. My daughter means the world to me and I feel like he still just uses her for control over me sometimes. There wasn't any reason for this, she was loving day camp, she cries every morning when I have to take her to his house instead. I was considerate of his feelings, I know he likes the summer with her (he doesn't work) but he has two children younger than her in the house and this should have been her time, I only asked that she be able to go every other week after his two week vacation. It was four weeks out of the summer. Geesh.

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