[ahmar]

I am feeling lonely.I don't know why I can't talk in public.I can't make eye contact even with my friends why?I'm going to college soon my physique and look is very young so I am worried that will my big fellow will accept me.
Give me tips to get bold in public.

[fredg]

Hi,
I just answered another of your questions in another category.
I am not a Psychic; don't pretend to be.
Not everyone needs to be "bold"... outgoing... a salesperson.
I was also nervous at 18 yrs old, even took a Speech class in college to help me overcome shyness. It helped.
You are feeling "shy" because you are afraid of your outward appearance. The way you look has nothing to do with talking with others, or making eye contact with them.
The next time you talk with a friend, force yourself, YES, force yourself, to look at their eyes; if only for a short time at first.
You can do it, if you try hard enough. I do wish you the best, and remember; Talk about others, not yourself. If they want to know something about you, then tell them.

[DJ 'H']

This is a self confidence issue. You appear to have very low self esteem and confidence. Being able to talk in public and feel comfortable around others all boils down to be comfortable with yourself.

I used to be like you a few years ago after a series of people contiuosly put me down and took the mickey out of me. I lost my confidence. I am a performer (singer, dancer, actress) and I was unable to do any of those things. I twas forced into it once and I was trembling and I could not even sing - it was so humiliating.

I got over it by friends reminding me who I was. They stuck by me through thick and thin and kicked me up the arse to get back into it all. They slowly and surely bought me back and saved me.

I now have so mch confidence, I can do anything.

It's hard but you really do have to learn to like yourself and to be yourself. The hardest lesson to learn is that if people don't like you for who you are - they are not worth knowing and any nasty comments made need to go in one ear and straight out through the other.

You sound like a really fab girl and I have every faith in you. You can do anything when you apply yourself.

[Fr_Chuck]

First we are all different, and we are not accepted by everyone no matter how hard. I am one of those loud talking people who talks to everyone, but that does not mean everyone that talks to me likes me. They may not rfully accept me for my religion, the fact I am partially disabled, that I am just so darn good looking.

But if you want to lean to speak to people, find and take a public speeking class, there should be some available around a college area

[Hypatia]

My advice, sounds to me like you need a confidence booster. If you have the money this will help you feel better about yourself. It is a great investment in you.
Buy a Maxim, GQ,FHM, any mag that has mens fashions so you can copy the look you like. Cut out the coolest hairstyles you love and make a kind of book of them. Paste and glue every cool picture you want to see yourself as in this book. From hair to clothes to shoes to sunglasses.
Then go to a local salon that caters to the young hip crowd. Tell them you want the works, new hairstyle, brows shaped, manicure, anything you can afford. Show them your book and tell them which look you like.
Then go to a good clothing store, not one really expensive one, just a good one. Go buy some new hip clothes. Use your book as a guide to follow.
In the end you will have the you that isnt afraid to look at others. Isnt afraid that people will not like the way you look. You will be a new you that you yourself have chosen and improved. Your style will not have changed it just got a boost. Your looks will not have majorly changed to anything fake, you are just blossoming the flower of the self.
Soon you will also find that in putting so much love into yourself, others will wonder why you shine so brightly. They will approach you and be asking for your secret! They will have trouble looking you in the eye!
Soon you will see that they are just like you in different experiences of being. They are you and you are them with only a different face.

Have confidence. Women prefer a great personality over a great face anyday.

Hypatia