[sun101dancer]

OK Here is the situation... I date this guy for about 4 months. He had been in a relationship to where he has a baby 9 months old. When we meet he was not with the baby mother. We did not spent lots of time together. But saw each other eveyday sometimes 3 or times a day. We had sex only twice! Now he has stopped coming around. No word of nothing just stopped! I take it now we are not together anymore because he is back with his baby's mother. I see they are together cause my cousins live right beside me in which he still visits and stays the night with a lot. All right I get an email from the girlfriend now She knows I had been trying to get her boyfriend alone to have sex with him, and that I am a whore. My cousins wife which now are great friends with the girlfriend has been saying that I am a whore too. I also get phone calls from the girlfriend asking if her boyfriend is her. Which I tell her no he is not and she knows that! Which really upsets me cause this is part of my family. Which in return has caused a lot of problems between the family. My cousins know that we were dating and had sex. I want to confront all of them.. cousins, all my family, the guy I date and his girlfriend now, and tell the truth. But my mom has advise me not to say anything at all? And to say he talked about his now girlfriend that he has a baby by like a dog, called her names. I told him he should never talk about anyone like that much less the mother of his baby. Should I confront them or not?

[N0help4u]

I would let it go and if she tries to start anything with you just tell her she should concentrate more on pleasing her man now instead of keeping the past alive. And that you don't know where he is or what he is up to since he is not your boyfriend.

[JBeaucaire]

People call other people names because THEY have life problems and mental issues they have no resolution for, so they distract themselves from their own chaos by tossing mouth-grenades at likely targets. Are you a likely target? You don't have to be, and it takes YOUR permission for their mouth-grenades to harm you.

If you start digging through the trash, you will smell. It doesn't matter what people say about you (it REALLY doesn't, no matter how it feels) as long as you are living your life in a way that clearly demonstrates what is being said is false.

So, live a clean life.

Then, chuckle out loud in the face of the bad comments. Laugh OUT LOUD at it so whomever repeated the words sees how completely unaffected you are.

Then, last of all, actually BE unaffected. Unfaltering self-confidence is the absolute best weapon in this situation.

[Fr_Chuck]

Doing anything but forgetting the jerk and moving on with life will do nothing but cause more heartaches.