[DevilsAngel1177]

We are really close and do everything together. We see each other 3 times a week usually and more if possible.

My boyfriend and I always see each other on Fridays but for the next 3 weeks I'm having to work on Friday afternoon (4 until 7), Saturday (9 until 1) and Sunday (10 until 1). I would normally go to his house on Fridays but it takes me an hour to get to his by train and then id have to go home in 2 hours as I can't stay over because of work so early in the morning so I'm not going to his. He said he'd come over to my house instead as it only takes him a hour to get to my house on his motorbike but his mates are all having a guys night at a pub near my house. He hasn't really seen them properly in ages and as it's a guys night, his mates wouldn't want me to go anyway.

Instead he was going to come over to my house this Saturday and stay all day until Sunday night, but I realised today that id already told my best mate that id go with her to a ball which I can't back out of even if I wanted to because I've paid £50 for the ticket, bought a dress and booked a hair appointment. This means that he won't be able to stay over on Saturday as ill be busy all day getting ready for the ball.

Because of this, I won't see him until Sunday. I still want him to see his mates on Friday but I also want to see him. Would it be wrong of me to ask him to come and see me instead? I would go to this night with the guys but obviously because it's a guys night, they wouldn't want me there. I just feel upset because I feel like I haven't seen him properly for ages because when he came round on Tuesday he was doing college work whilst I was sat watching TV next to him. He had to get this work done because the deadline was the day after but I still felt ignored. I feel upset because won't see my boyfriend properly until Sunday and the pub they will be in is only down the road and I'm not allowed to see him. I don't know whether I should go anyway just for a little bit and then go back home. I can't do anything with my friends that night because most of them are with their own boyfriends or by the time I get to where they are, I'll have to go home due to bus times.

Should I ask him not to go to the guys night? If I did, id feel really guilty but if he goes ill feel kind of lonely as Friday night is "our" night (if you see what I mean).

If I don't ask him, should I ask if could go with him to the pub? I want to go because not only am I with him, but I get to see him really really happy. I don't normally see him like that because when he's with me it more a relaxed sort of happy. I miss seeing him like that and when I do see him like that it make me so happy!

I just don't know what to do! I want to put him first but I know ill be upset because I'm missing seeing him that happy. What should I do? :confused:

[Rockstar714]

I say let him go out with his friends. You're going out with your friend Saturday night to the ball, would it be fair if he asked you to stay home from that?

You get to see him Sunday, its not like if you don't see him before then that you'll never see him again, and you saw him Tuesday (even though he was busy, you two were still together).

You have the rest of your life to be together all the time, let him go have fun with his friends. Guys need their friends just as much as girls do. When my boyfriend wants to hang out with his friends, I let him and I get all the stuff I need to do around the house done. Or I read, or do something and enjoy the alone time because he wants to be around me all the time.

[Romefalls19]

Rock star brings up a great point. How would you feel if he told you to stay home from the ball? One weekend away from each other won't kill you guys, I promise... You both had separate lives, live them.

[westnlas]

I don't understand why he couldn't spend Saturday at your place. If you are getting ready to go to the ball, I fail to understand why he couldn't hang out. He could wait at your place until you got home, unless you're planning to bring someone home with you ? You guys would have Sunday. He could go with his friends, crash at your place. You get ready and go to the dance. He hangs out. Sunday you both kick back together.

[JBeaucaire]

... and I can't understand why people have to spend every single possible minute with their guy/gal as if the world depended on it... or need them to "wait patiently" at their house until they get off work.

There is such a thing as generous distance. Give your guy a well-deserved weekend off and STOP thinking of it as a loss. It's not. Generosity in all forms is its own reward, including making sure your guy gets regular time with the his boys.

Be the best girlfriend. Do this for him, and not just this weekend, with regularity. It will not only amaze him, but your unjealous actions will benefit you both in the long run.

[Distantlove]

How old are you? And how long have you been with your boyfriend? You're basically saying your upset because you can't see him at the weekend? It really isn't that big a deal, trust me. The fact you see each other at least 3 times a week (nearly everyday) is more of a dig deal.. one day you'll drive each other insane! You both need your own lives. Let him go to his guy's night, don't tell him not to because that will definitely cause problems. It may not cause a problem this time but you will get used to doing it and he'll resent you for that. You need to live your own life as well. No healthy couple spends every minute of the day with each other, you need to show that you are secure in this relationship and can go a few days without seeing him. I'v been through a time where I haven't seen my boyfriend for 6 weeks straight, and it wasn't that bad at all. If you don't show that you can spend time apart, how else are you going to see that you have a strong relationship? To be honest, he shouldn't've even seen you when he had work to do, that's his own time. You'll find that when you spend time apart, you'll miss each other more, and the time you do spend with each other will be even better. Maybe not now, but if you carry on seeing each other sooo much, he or you is going to find that it's becoming routine and you'll find that you'll have nothing much to do. You're not married yet, make sure this time is well spent. Make the most of it because when you do get married (be it this partner or another) you'll realise that you wished you spent your single life, making the most of it with friends and having fun before getting hitced, and he'll realise that too.

[AndMadMan]

You don't want him to see his mates because you want to see him but you can't see him cause you are going out with your friend the next night.

Yeah, I think it would be wrong for you to ask him to cancel on his guys night out. Hopefully you'll be that much more excited the next time you see him.

[chuff]

For the love of God, he needs a break from you, give it to him and quit acting like a needy girlfriend.

[jiltedgirl]

Don't be so hard on yourself. Sheesh. It's not a bad thing to want to spend time with him. You are his girlfriend after all. If you didn't feel this way, THAT would be the problem. However, everyone needs their space. I had a boyfriend who was a bit controlling (understatement) and wanted me to spend all my weekends/weekdays with him, and this is coming from an intense person (me! Lol. :)) I was flattered, but felt more stifled and confined than anything else.

Let him go out with his friends. You don't need to see him. It's not as though you won't see him for many months or something. Then, it'd be a different story.

Best,
J :)

[talaniman]

You have fun, and let him have his fun, and make it up later. I bet he isn't tripping on the arrangements like you are.

[N0help4u]

If you are okay with him at your house when you are not home why don't you just invite him for the whole weekend and let him go out with the guys on Friday night. You are going out Sat so it is only fair. Then when you get back Sat night you have until he goes back home to spend with him. That way too it saves him traveling back and forth Friday and Sunday. He might love you all the more for it.
If you 'are not allowed to see him at the bar' don't go it will only get him upset with you.

[DevilsAngel1177]

Thanks for all your answers, guys! I let him go out with his mates in the end and he asked if he could walk me home that night from a party I went to and he stayed over to show he appreciated me not getting mad at him! :)

[Rockstar714]

See, there you go. Everybody won. :)