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BigJG · Jun 22, 2008, 04:40 PM

I'm 27 and I think I will give myself until I reach 30, or shortly thereafter. I chose that age because I think it's sort of like the top of the mountain before you go back down. Waiting longer than that means you lessen your chances of finding someone, unless you would rather be with someone younger as opposed to your own age.

twinkiedooter · Jun 22, 2008, 06:38 PM

Why would you limit yourself to age 30 to make this decision? If you said 70 I would agree but 30, no way should you stop there. You are not going to lessen your chances of finding anyone either. In this day and age, 30 is still relatively young. When you reach 50 or 60 then that's getting on. Just remember they upped the age you have to be to retire now. It used to be 65, now they upped it. Are you afraid that you are going to be alone the rest of your life and not have any kids? Some people don't get married until they are in their 30's. Relax. You're still too young to worry about being alone the rest of your life. You'll find your love.

magprob · Jun 22, 2008, 08:13 PM

30? 50 or 60? You youngsters need to take a chill pill, while I pop another viagra! See you in 6 hours. :)

Wondergirl · Jun 22, 2008, 08:17 PM

Good grief! My sons are 33 and 37. They finally have gotten their lives organized and are just beginning to look.

I'd be dead before I stopped looking.

magprob · Jun 22, 2008, 09:01 PM

Next!

Fr_Chuck · Jun 22, 2008, 09:02 PM

After 70 maybe

magprob · Jun 22, 2008, 09:14 PM

70? Dang Padre, the ole ladies around town were calling my Grandfather, "Melvin the Masher," when he was 76. He died at 92 from a Viagra over dose. It took us a whole week just to get the lid on the casket closed!

Wondergirl · Jun 22, 2008, 09:32 PM

The Week magazine has a two-page special essay at the end of each issue. This past week's essay was about old people in nursing homes and their sex lives. The essay centered around a 95 y/o man and his 80-something girlfriend. The man's son couldn't understand that his father could be in love and would still enjoy sex and actually have a sex life, so he removed the father from that home and put him elsewhere. The father's girlfriend has gone into a depression, eats only in her room now and refuses to play the home's piano.

The essay cautioned that, with people living longer now and with better health care, families need to wake up to the fact that, like my mother says, just because there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there's no fire in the fireplace.

magprob · Jun 22, 2008, 09:37 PM

And the son was probably worried about his inheritance.

Wondergirl · Jun 22, 2008, 10:00 PM

Probably that -- and was freaking over the fact that his father was a sexual being, since we all know our parents grudgingly and unhappily had sex only enough times to create us and our sibs and then never again.

HistorianChick · Jun 23, 2008, 01:40 PM

Wow... I don't think it's a matter of "accepting that you're going to be single for the rest of your life"... I think it's a matter of accepting that you are going to make each day count for the rest of your life... single or not...

Happiness or acceptance should not be based upon whether you have someone with you, but upon who you are when you're by yourself because you have to live in your own head...

And being with someone doesn't garuntee happiness... nor does it make you secure in yourself and who you are.

Wow...

I guess at 29 I must be old-fashioned, but I'm happy just being me... single or not!

progunr · Jun 23, 2008, 02:04 PM

I was 45 when I met my current wife.

You need to raise your bar.

Finding your soul mate, does not have an expiration date.

N0help4u · Jun 23, 2008, 03:44 PM

Don't waste your time and energy thinking about things like that.
I got married at 28 divorced at 36. Gave up on guys for a few years, got in a couple bad relationships. Vowed I would not bother with guys ever again. Couple years later started seeing a guy lasted approx. 3 months. Months later started seeing another guy for a couple years. Swore off guys again for 3 1/2 years. Now I am seeing a guy at 53 and he keeps asking me why I never took him serious when he would ask me out for the past 17 years.
Don't limit yourself to rules and restrictions you make up in advance on time limits.

magprob · Jun 23, 2008, 05:52 PM

Originally Posted by N0help4u

Don't waste your time and energy thinking about things like that.
I got married at 28 divorced at 36. Gave up on guys for a few years, got in a couple bad relationships. Vowed I would not bother with guys ever again. couple years later started seeing a guy lasted approx. 3 months. Months later started seeing another guy for a couple years. Swore off guys again for 3 1/2 years. Now I am seeing a guy at 53 and he keeps asking me why I never took him serious when he would ask me out for the past 17 years.
Don't limit yourself to rules and restrictions you make up in advance on time limits.

Sounds like you're a real sucker for a good line. :)

firmbeliever · Jun 23, 2008, 06:18 PM

Originally Posted by HistorianChick

Wow... I don't think its a matter of "accepting that you're going to be single for the rest of your life".... I think its a matter of accepting that you are going to make each day count for the rest of your life... single or not....

Happiness or acceptance should not be based upon whether you have someone with you, but upon who you are when you're by yourself because you have to live in your own head....

And being with someone doesn't garuntee happiness... nor does it make you secure in yourself and who you are.

I agree with HC.

And also agree with what most of the other posters here are saying.

I was born when my dad was 67-68.

EDIT:::

BigJG,
I would also like to say that it is a far worse condition than being single,that is to be unhappy with who you are at any moment in life.

I know a man who is still single and still looking for the right mate at the age of 55-57(not sure of his exact age).He is someone still considered to be an eligible bachelor by anyone's standard.

Wondergirl · Jun 23, 2008, 07:04 PM

Originally Posted by firmbeliever

I would also like to say that it is a far worse condition than being single,that is to be unhappy with who you are at any moment in life.

And if you never find that person, you will still have yourself and be happy inside your own skin.

BigJG · Jun 25, 2008, 04:39 PM

I wish I could say I am happy with who I am, but I'm not. I don't know why, but I'm just not. I don't accept myself and I have this thing where I think I'm not good enough for anyone.

HistorianChick · Jun 26, 2008, 02:26 PM

Darling BigJG, you don't have to be "good enough for anyone"... all you have to worry about is being good enough for YOU. When you are "good enough" for you, you're more than enough for anything, not just anyONE. Don't focus on being good enough for other people. Really. Its more important to be comfortable in yourself.

Allheart · Jun 26, 2008, 02:49 PM

Originally Posted by BigJG

I wish I could say I am happy with who I am, but I'm not. I don't know why, but I'm just not. I don't accept myself and I have this thing where I think I'm not good enough for anyone.

Hey BigJG - I don't know a person alive, who is completely happy with who they are.
That's actually a good quality. It means you are reaching... reaching for the best you.
You ask someone 25, 30, 35, 40, 50, 60, 70 and on and on... if there was something they wished they could change about themselves, or something they didn't like about themselves... and I bet, each person, would give you a list of at least 3 things on it.

Don't ever set limitations for yourself... you just take each day as it comes... and find things you do like about yourself... and those are the things you are going to want to share with that special someone, including yourself.

Everyong, has similar thoughts about not being good enough, but that's would keeps us reaching to do better... so chin up!! You are not alone!