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    Hottrodder246's Avatar
    Hottrodder246 Posts: 125, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Jun 18, 2008, 12:27 PM
    Picking up girls?
    I have a huge problem. I can't seem to ever pick up any girls, I don't know why. I'm single, good looking, in college and I'm smart, but it seems like they see it the complete opposite. Could it be something I'm saying or doing? Could it be my attitude or how I project my image? I'm so confused, I need advice on how to talk to and act around girls.
    progunr's Avatar
    progunr Posts: 1,971, Reputation: 288
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Jun 18, 2008, 12:56 PM
    Yeah dude, if you are projecting the "I'm single, I'm good looking, and I'm smart" attitude to the women you try to engage in a conversation with, that is the problem.

    Especially the "I'm good looking" part.

    Looks are subjective, while one woman may find you to be irresistible, another could think you look hideous, it is all a matter of taste.

    I could be wrong, but the way you described yourself, makes you sound a little conceited.
    smokedetector's Avatar
    smokedetector Posts: 368, Reputation: 56
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Jun 18, 2008, 01:23 PM
    Girls like confidence, so if you aren't really sure of yourself you could be putting off that vibe. If you are over confident, however, that can be a real turn off. Nobody likes someone who thinks they can do no wrong or are better than everyone else. If you really identify with a certain stereotype, like jock, prep, punk, emo, etc. then you are likely turning off a lot of people as well. Some girls automatically write off a guy if he's good looking and is overconfident, because they assume he has had a lot of "love em and leave em" experience. At least, that's been my experience with college age relationships. Basically, be yourself and don't try to fit into any stereotypes just because you think you'll get girls that way. I don't know if any of this applies to you, so if your situation is different give us more info and we can all probably give better advice.
    Hottrodder246's Avatar
    Hottrodder246 Posts: 125, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Jun 18, 2008, 01:55 PM
    I don't around bragging about myself at all and I'm always the one to talk and make people laugh and smile. But I do think its my confidence, cause when I meet new people I don't like talking to them and sometimes they think I can be an .
    smokedetector's Avatar
    smokedetector Posts: 368, Reputation: 56
    Full Member
     
    #5

    Jun 18, 2008, 02:55 PM
    I used to have that same problem, still do to an extent. What I've found is that if you go out with a friend that IS confident, you can take cues off them. Then you will learn that people don't bite. Maybe you will be able to muster up the courage to be more outgoing as time goes on. I've come to find as you get older, your inhibitions start to go out the window. You're not so afraid that people won't like you and you are willing to make that first impression rather than try to be invisible. Best of luck.
    Nestorian's Avatar
    Nestorian Posts: 978, Reputation: 152
    Senior Member
     
    #6

    Jun 18, 2008, 04:21 PM
    You could just wing it?? I do that, everyong I know has only two words to describe me, upon first meeting me, Quiet, and shy, but after they talk to me for a bit, there is no mistake, I'm crazy/random and when nessisary wise beyound my years. But very seldom confident. Try to remind yourself that you are who you are, and some girls don't like that, but there are thoughs who do. Try joining a new group, one you are interested in, not too meet girls, but just for fun, kicks. Open your net work of friends, and you never know what may happen.

    “[Luke:] I can't believe it. [Yoda:] That is why you fail.”
    hjpan's Avatar
    hjpan Posts: 902, Reputation: 29
    Senior Member
     
    #7

    Jun 19, 2008, 02:45 PM
    You say you are good looking, but you would probably be considered trash by other girls.
    Hottrodder246's Avatar
    Hottrodder246 Posts: 125, Reputation: 1
    Junior Member
     
    #8

    Jun 22, 2008, 11:11 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by hjpan
    You say you are good looking, but you would probably be considered trash by other girls.
    G thanks
    Simple Asian's Avatar
    Simple Asian Posts: 302, Reputation: 13
    Full Member
     
    #9

    Jun 23, 2008, 01:47 AM
    lol... pplz can be hush up here sometime ^^ but we just trying to tell you the truth and helping you out buddy ^^...

    girls like confident... a guy that they can depend on... have fun with.. and feel comferable being with ^^ are you one of those...

    but also girls are really complicated... they like you confident yet not too confident... love yourself yet not too cocky... fun yet serious... plenty more to be around..

    practice make perfect ^^... or should I say practice make BETTER.. you will get better if you put yourself out there.. just be you and only you... because if you fake yourself and girls like you ? They not really like you they like the fake you ^^..

    THINK ABOUT IT ^^
    hjpan's Avatar
    hjpan Posts: 902, Reputation: 29
    Senior Member
     
    #10

    Jun 23, 2008, 02:03 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Simple Asian
    lol...pplz can be hush up here sometime ^^ but we just trying to tell you the truth and helping you out buddy ^^...

    girls like confident ...a guy that they can depend on...have fun with ..and feel comferable being with ^^ are you one of those ...

    but also girls are really complicated ....they like you confident yet not too confident...love yourself yet not too cocky.... fun yet serious ...plenty more to be around ..

    practice make perfect ^^ ...or should i say practice make BETTER ..you will get better if you put yourself out there ..just be you and only you ...because if you fake yourself and girls like you ? they not really like you they like the fake you ^^..

    THINK ABOUT IT ^^

    No no no... let's rephrase what you said.

    GIRLS ARE THE MOST COMPLICATED AS TO GUYS

    At the original poster:

    You have three sets of girls: sluts/whores, mix of both sluts/whores and "innocent", and the fully innocent. I can tell you straight up majority of the girls are sluts/whores mixed with innocence and in the subgroup, there is the slut/whores. The fully innocent is... rare to find =/

    Just keep your head up, eyeballs open, ears clean, and mouth shut
    ISneezeFunny's Avatar
    ISneezeFunny Posts: 4,175, Reputation: 821
    Ultra Member
     
    #11

    Jun 23, 2008, 02:16 AM
    What are you exactly doing to pick up girls? Are you actually going up to them, talking to them, and starting a conversation with them, or are you waiting for them to come to you?

    If you actually engage in a conversation with them, are you actually talking about something interesting or talking about yourself? (it's true. Most of the time, you yourself are not that interesting).

    You got to understand. You may think you're the catch of the day, but buddy... the 200+ other guys in the club/bar/class think the same thing.

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