[justconfused16]

I don't know how to feel.

MY best friend and I dated for a short period, 22 days. It was great and everything went well; she was my first girlfriend. We broke up because, as she put it, "lack of chemistry". My fault, to be honest, she said she wanted to take things slow and I went a little overboard.

Now, it has been a little over three weeks and I'm still not "over" her. Yesterday, I found out that she still likes me too. The problem is, she's dating another guy. They've been dating for 17 days.

She's happy, as far as I'm aware--and we do talk a lot. We hang out everyday at our friend's house for three hours a day and then for an hour or two after that. We also talk on the phone most, if not all nights for at least an hour--we're close.

Her boyfriend and I don't get along and I've given my opinion of him to her before, but that was before they were dating. I know she cares about my opinion so I choose not to give it because I really don't know nor like him and even if I did I feel my opinion would be biased because I still have feelings for her.

He has said he is going to get her a "promise ring". It symbolizes that if they were older, he would want to be engaged to her but they're too young to be married or engaged.


Should I be happy for her? She is after all happy and that's all that should matter, right? I just want her to be happy but at the same time... I just don't know. In my opinion--two weeks is not long enough to decide that you want to be engaged to someone... but I don't know if that's me talking as a friend or as an ex-boyfriend/admirer...


Advice is appreciated...

[JBeaucaire]

• You tried dating your best friend
• You weren't compatible that way based on being in different "gears"
• You broke up and stayed friends (AWESOME!)
• She's dating someone else

That about right? Ok, well, friendship clearly works WAY better for you than intimacy. In fact, if you think about it, it's actually harder to be a good friend than a bad boyfriend.

Savor your friendship. Cherish it and don't filter your honest advice. As long as it is her well-being you are truly advising and not trying to secretly "get her back", then you're in a unique position to help her.

You'll always love her. Stop trying not to. Just don't over-romanticize it. Love feelings come on by themselves and you have no control over them. So, keep that in mind, don't let them make you crazy or spoil your friendship. Ignore them if you have to, but I hope you don't.

But you DO have control over good decisions. Your brief sojourn into dating ended quickly, but you kept your commitment to each other.

Awesome! Don't spoil it.