[justconfused16]

My best friend has been sort of depressed lately, with good reason I suppose.
We hang in a group that is really tight--we would do anything for each other. Her and I are the only two members of said group that do not smoke. The others said they would quit and did for some time, but then they picked it up again.
We are in the ages of 14, 15, 15, 15, 15, 16, 16, 16, 17, 18. Most of us, not old enough to legally smoke for the most part.
My friend and I talk all the time, generally 2-3 hours a day on the phone. Lately she's been talking about how when she's older, she's just going to move on to college and forget all about our neighborhood and all of us. She's tired of watching our friends' destroy their lives; she doesn't want to see them never advancing in life because they would rather hang around and get high (Yeah... they smoke pot too, but have cut down quite a bit.).

I truly feel the same way, in a few years I'll be attending an out-of-state college and I don't know if I'll ever look back. I want her to be happy, but I don't know what to tell her about the situation, any advice?

[MommyLeah]

I think you both have the right idea. It seems like you are making mature decisions about your feelings. It is hard when you have been friends for a long time to feel OK about moving on, but there comes a point where some people just drift apart, they choose different paths. I have one friend from high school that I am still friends with. We are many states away from each other, but no matter how long we go without talking, it never seems awkward. All my other friends, we just didn't stay the same, we lost touch, didn't have anything to talk about anymore. Stay strong and be true to yourself.

[Fr_Chuck]

Even for those that don't plan it, after high school veiw people keep close. Some do and that can be great, but people go off to college, they move off to jobs 100's or 1000's of miles away, marry get busy with life and come back to their old home tows to visit family, or maybe their 10 or 20 year high school reunion.

So basically this is just honestly admitting what may happen. But then with email and the such, we can stay in some contact if we try hard

[Chery]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you two growing and choosing paths that your other 'buddies' are not ready for yet. They too, will probably wander off and live lives they would not even think of right now. It is all part of growing up. Some of you will mature faster than others and some might not even mature at all - depending on their mental states.

I was a military child, and a military wife - which meant moving again and again at least every three years or so. To me, it was fun visiting new countried and making new 'friends' and we all knew that we would not be together forever - but there was communication via letters, and now via emails - so those of us who shared the same interests later still kept in contact. That's just the way of the world today.

It will all work out in the longrun, so don't let this stress you out, dear. It's fun to be a global citizen with the right attitude.