[Toluca_86]

So I like this guy... (Isn't that the way it always starts?)

So I dated a guy I'd just met casually for a couple months, about half a year ago. Then he went on two dates with someone else he "really liked" who was friends with some of his friends, and so broke it off with me. Part of me guessed that meant that he wasn't really that attracted to me, although I'd been acting fairly distant and casual so there was some ambiguity, I think, as to whether he thought I was only looking for something casual and he wanted a relationship with someone... He was also on the rebound (well, so he said, he'd actually been single for almost a year at that point) from an ex who he'd been good friends with, who was smokin' hot, and with whom he'd had a bad and unexpected breakup.

We hung out a couple more times as "just friends," then I left to go back to school and he asked if we could stay in touch, and said he was really glad he got to know me and stuff. And we've stayed in touch, because we have pretty fun conversations every couple weeks or so, and at times in our conversations he keeps insinuating that he thinks I'm an especially attractive person (volunteering that opinion, not that I'm fishing for compliments). And the woman he was dating when I left, well, she is listed as "single" on her online profile -I don't know whether they're still dating, but I'd guess it hasn't yet progressed into a serious relationship at the least.

And School is over in like another month, and I think I should talk to him about more "our situation", because the only conversation like that we ever had was just a few minutes long and kind of vague, when he was telling me he'd met someone else, and I guess he must not be aware of it, but when he compliments me now it twists me up inside and I don't know how to deal... And I'm sure he expects me to at least hang out with him some -I've been kind of friendly to him because I can't help it, but also I don't want to drive myself nuts being so confused...

I know I can't know exactly what is going through his head. You guys can't either, really. But any ideas as to some different possibilities? Or how I could have a conversation with him about what is going on?

I'm not saying I want a serious relationship with him -that would make no sense. But whatever happens between us I just really need to know that he wasn't faking things when we were dating, and that he's not condescending to me or "just trying to make me feel good" now when he compliments me...

[Toluca_86]

It's a busy day at the forums -bump...

[N0help4u]

I wouldn't read anything into the compliments.
He said he is interested in somebody else so I would either be just his friend until he decides you are the one he wants to be with or it is clear that he is into somebody else and no chance for you being with him.

[Toluca_86]

I reposted this question in another thread, because no one had replied to this one. As I say over there, my problem is more that I don't want to be friends w/ someone who'd compliment me a lot and not mean it. That's why I want to talk to him. As it is, I haven't told him my concerns and I've been trying to ignore them, and that's not working. If he just disappeared altogether I'd probably be okay with that, but that's obviously not happening anytime soon.:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating...do-210483.html

[Kellie_h20]

I don't know that is a hard situation. I think that he is complementing you because he DOES like you but (there is always a but) YOU NEED TO MAKE IT CLEAR HOW YOU FEEL. It is harder for a guy to tell you how he feels if there is the possibility of rejection. Just like us females, guys have a fear of being rejected. Just, next time you guys have one on one hang out time then tell him you need to know because if he isn't all into you in that way then you are moving on because there are plenty other guys and you don't want to waste your time waiting for him.