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womble05 · Apr 22, 2008, 01:54 AM

My partner and I are having a troubled time at the moment and he says he loves me but needs to find in his heart how to fall in love with me again, how do I help him and what should I do.? :confused:

Marriedguy · Apr 22, 2008, 05:01 AM

First there is no formula to make someone fall in love with you. I don't think that he has stopped loving you. It sounds more like he is just unhappy at the moment. Couples have fights and have arguments; it's the couples that make compromises that survive.

What are troubling times?

nickshehe · Apr 22, 2008, 06:36 AM

At least he is honest with you and communication is always important in a relationship.. Like marriedguy said you should elaborate on what troubled times you're having exactly.. You're both willing to fix things which is a good first step - so you could always seek professional counselling or what not?
Maybe spice things up, plan a holiday to an exotic island over summer or something that could spark the relationship back into life.
These aren't guarantees of love but it could breathe life into your relationship again.

talaniman · Apr 22, 2008, 08:56 AM

how do I help him and what should I do.? :confused:

Back off, and let him come to his own conclusions, without any pressure from you.

womble05 · Apr 23, 2008, 01:31 AM

Originally Posted by nickshehe

Atleast he is honest with you and communication is always important in a relationship..Like marriedguy said you should elaborate on what troubled times you're having exactly..You're both willing to fix things which is a good first step - so you could always seek professional counselling or what not?
Maybe spice things up, plan a holiday to an exotic island over summer or something that could spark the relationship back into life.
These aren't guarantees of love but it could breathe life into your relationship again.

Thanks for that, we do talk and we are trying to sort things out. I have no doubt in my mind that he loves me but is not in love with me.
When we met he fell in love with me so quickly and I think it overwelmed me slightly. We were together for a year when he proposed and about 8 months after that I lost sight of a lot of things. He just wants a woman that sets goals and fullfills them and I have promised and then let him down. He feels that this is the way I will always be, but this last month I have gone out of my way to sort this out. I really hope we can sort it cause he is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with :(

talaniman · Apr 23, 2008, 06:29 AM

If he is looking to see any changes in you, actions will speak louder than words.

womble05 · Apr 24, 2008, 02:31 AM

Originally Posted by talaniman

If he is looking to see any changes in you, actions will speak louder than words.

Those words mean such a lot. Thank you. These last few weeks I have been fulfilling my goals this time and have been trying to get myself back into shape, going to the gym, looking after the house and being a proper future wife to him, whilst also holding down a full time job.

I hope this works as I love him very much. Xx;) ;)