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lynxwizard · Mar 12, 2008, 02:23 PM

Well I have been without a girlfriend now for 7 months, maybe its time to meet new people. I still have feelings for the ex but need to move on.

There is this Girl at work I would like to take out, I used to see her once in a great while in the hall, but never said anything. Also saw her at a restaruant with a little boy and some guy a few months back, one day I was in the lunchroom with a coworker who works on her floor and I asked him if he knew her, he did. He said she is divorced with a young son, she left her husband because he cheated on her and she lives with her brother, he said she was a very nice gal.

I asked my friend when he sees her if he would try and set me up, he said her would, for some reason I never see her anymore at work, (big building) my friend says whenever he sees her these days she is always with someone, He wants to bring me up to her when she is alone but she never is.

So I may never get my chance, I think I need to act, I was thinking of sending her a email from my home and not my work email, thought it would be better that way.

So do you think that would be Ok ? Or to weird ?

I would say something like, " Hi my name is ####,I work in the same building as you and I have noticed you for the past few months, but never had a chance to introduce myself, My friend john who knows you said he would mention me to you but he never sees you alone and does not want to make you uncomfortable, he told me you are single and that you were a nice person, I dont know if you remember but I saw you at a Taco Bell a few months ago, maybe you remember seeing me a few times at work"
(then I would describe myself to her)

"I know this is kind of strange to get a email from a stranger but I thought It would be nice to maybe get to know you, please dont think I am some kind of weirdo, I just thought this may be the only way to contact you, if I have offened you I am sorry, have a nice day ".

So would that be Ok or not ? And she is 32 and I am 47, do you think that would turn her off ?

Scleros · Mar 12, 2008, 02:46 PM

That email is nice, logical, full of disclosure in an attempt to be non-threatening, and also totally stalker-ish and apologetic. It _is_ possible to say too much. Dude, Taco Bell months ago!

Why don't you make an effort to run into her, smile and say hi, gauge her reaction, and then follow-up with a phone call. Or just call her and introduce yourself. It won't seem as if you and your friend have been spying on her for months.

If you do send that email, please post or message back with the outcome. I'd love to know how that turns out.

Bluerose · Mar 12, 2008, 03:05 PM

Email not a good idea. If you want this to go anywhere start the way you mean to go on, up-front and honest.

squeaks77 · Mar 12, 2008, 03:17 PM

As a shy female I would be weirded out by a seemingly random email asking for a date. Perhaps you can find a reason to visit her department or ask her a specific job related question. Then maybe after some chat you can ask to buy her coffee at break.

peggyhill · Mar 12, 2008, 03:22 PM

I would steer clear of the email, and try to get to know her in person first. If your friend won't introduce you, then try to talk to her another way. See if you can find a reason to talk to her at work, or eat lunch at the same time, something like that.

wannabehappy · Mar 12, 2008, 03:24 PM

I don't think an email would be a bad idea, but I guess it was better if you don't write too much about your interest in her, don't tell her you used to see her... you can start with something "stupid" like "i know you from anywhere...are you from ####?" try something like it. Sometimes it works. Good luck! Tell us news

ihatewestseneca · Mar 12, 2008, 03:29 PM

Just be direct with her, go out of your way to find her at work if you have to. If she is with people ask her if you could have a moment of her time, and then proceed to introduce yourself and ask her if she'd like to go out sometime, if all goes well, exchange numbers and whatnot. No offense, but you're 47, man up and talk to her. What do you have to lose? You said you barley see her anyway.

friend4u178 · Mar 12, 2008, 06:04 PM

I have to agree with the others , I think the email (even though well worded) may freak her out.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 12, 2008, 06:15 PM

You work with her, so go to see her and ask her out.

talaniman · Mar 16, 2008, 06:59 AM

I'm not to keen on workplace relationships, but its even worse when you ask someone else to speak for you, and it's the pits with this email idea. Introduce yourself, and say high. Your 47, not 17.