[cardinal1]

I fathered a child with someone. (Yes, I know it was foolish.) My problem is that the mother has turned this in to a power struggle. We have agreed that in this situation an adoption is the best thing for the child. The mother does not want me involved in any way. She wants me to sign over my rights and walk away. I want to ensure that this child goes to a loving home. What rights do I have as a father? My only concern is the welfare of this innocent child. Please advise. Thank you.

[CaptainForest]

You have plenty of rights.

You do NOT have to sign away your rights to this child until you are satisfied with the home this child is going to.

The mother cannot keep you away (since for her to give the child up for adoption, she needs your consent).

Once you sign away your right, you have none, so you will no longer be able to say where the child goes. So don't sign away your rights until you have found that special family.

[Fr_Chuck]

First of course it will depend on what county you live in. I can speak for the USA.

Basically if you are the faither ( are you named on the birth certificate)
You have rights to file for custody yourself if she does not want the baby, to demand visitation and the such.

I do much prefer an adoption where you use an agency or attorney and you personally never know or meet the adoptive parents. It saves you latter changing your mind and really interferring with the child and his new parents several years down the road.

There are several good church agencies and many private attorneys that handle such adoptions.

But you have the right to be invovled to the last. Also if she changed her mind and keep the baby after you signed away your rights you no longer have them.

[weda_7526]

If u are the father you have just as many rights as the mother.:p

[korrnut]

This topic is a very touchy one. There are many factors you need to look at. One issue you have is the mother isn't required by any laws to include you on the birth certificate. If the child is currently unborn you have very little rights to it actually. The mother with or with out your concent can abort or give away this child. When the child is born if the mother doesn't wish to include you she doesn't have to. The only option you have then is to get and attorney and request a DNA screening. After the screening if you are proven to be the child's father only then do you have any rights to that child. This may sound implossible but it's all true. The mother prior to giving birth isn't required to even notify the father of her pregnancy. She can do as she pleases. Once the child is born if she chooses to leave you off the birth certificate or to have another man's name on it (if he's willing to sign) you can do nothing about it. At this point the only ability you have is to hire an attorney. Prove your paternity and then begin custody proceedings. This can be extremely costly. Good luck to you sir. One final thought is that this information is only applicable to US residents. If you are in another country the laws may be different.