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    upstateNYer's Avatar
    upstateNYer Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Feb 9, 2008, 12:23 PM
    Are my concerns valid enough to petition for Supervised Visits?
    I am legally separated from my husband and have primary custody of our two children (ages 3 & 5). He sees them once a week overnight and every other weekend. I would like to petition for supervised visits based on concerns I have when my husband has the kids and need to know if my concerns are valid enough for a judge's consideration:

    He refuses to buy milk for our son (age 3) which upsets him, and he does not feed them nutritious meals while in his care.

    He took naked pictures of himself masterbating while I was at work and he was watching the kids during the day.

    He is seeing a sex therapist and has had affairs with call girls. He currently has a webpage with naked photos of himself where he is soliciting for sex with men and women (1-on-1 & group sex) and he's into exhibitionism and voyeurism.

    He has inquired about a jack-off group for men where men gather to jack off with each other on a regularly scheduled basis.

    He has knives and fire arms in the house and I don't believe they are locked up.

    He won't let me in his house, and he tries very hard not to speak or even look at me. He is very disrespectful toward me and shows no courtesy when we are transitioning the kids from one house to the other.

    Thankfully, the kids are oblivious to his behaviors, and I am concerned about who or what he may expose them to.

    Do I have valid reasons to pursue a temporary order of protection and/or supervised visits? I need peace of mind when the kids are in his care. Please advise!! And, thanks!
    bushg's Avatar
    bushg Posts: 3,433, Reputation: 596
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    #2

    Feb 9, 2008, 12:27 PM
    1st of all I would call child protection services and explain the situation to them.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Feb 9, 2008, 01:39 PM
    I am sad to say except to the firearms, the court may not care about his sexual life. Remember having a life style that is nor the norm as long as it does not invovle the children if normally not even considered.

    1. he is into group and homosexual sex, I have seen people who were hookers still retain full cusotdy of their children. While it can be given to the court as evidence, the court my not even consider it.

    There is no requirement that you are allowed into his house, And there is no requirement for him to speak to you, in fact he could arrange to have the kids picked up by someone else so he never ever has to talk to you or see you.

    There really needs to be proof that the children are in danger ( the guns can do that)

    Many of the courts today are much much more liberal on sexual activities of one or more of the partners.

    I mean you can try, but not a lot of go on at this point, unless you do get a very concervitive judge
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #4

    Feb 9, 2008, 01:58 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by upstateNYer
    I am legally separated from my husband and have primary custody of our two children (ages 3 & 5). He sees them once a week overnight and every other weekend. I would like to petition for supervised visits based on concerns I have when my husband has the kids and need to know if my concerns are valid enough for a judge's consideration:

    He refuses to buy milk for our son (age 3) which upsets him, and he does not feed them nutritious meals while in his care.

    He took naked pictures of himself masterbating while I was at work and he was watching the kids during the day.

    He is seeing a sex therapist and has had affairs with call girls. He currently has a webpage with naked photos of himself where he is soliciting for sex with men and women (1-on-1 & group sex) and he's into exhibitionism and voyeurism.

    He has inquired about a jack-off group for men where men gather to jack off with each other on a regularly scheduled basis.

    He has knives and fire arms in the house and I don't believe they are locked up.

    He won't let me in his house, and he tries very hard not to speak or even look at me. He is very disrespectful toward me and shows no courtesy when we are transitioning the kids from one house to the other.

    Thankfully, the kids are oblivious to his behaviors, and I am concerned about who or what he may expose them to.

    Do I have valid reasons to pursue a temporary order of protection and/or supervised visits? I need peace of mind when the kids are in his care. Please advise!!! And, thanks!

    I think you need proof that this behavior is in front of the children; otherwise, it really (legally) doesn't impact them when they are this age and possibly not at any age. You also cannot control his friends or choice of activities unless likewise they endanger the children.

    He does not have to let you into his house, speak to you, look at you, respect you, show courtesy to you - would be nice if he did and would certainly make life easier but it's not a requirement.

    If he does have guns and they are not locked up, yes, he's endangering the children.

    The only way to know positively what the Court will decide is to go to Court, ask for restricted visitation and see what is ordered.

    If you feel he is truly endangering your children you owe it to them to keep them safe.

    (Has he always been into these activities?)

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