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cuddlykid · Feb 7, 2008, 08:03 AM

Hi everyone. Let me get to the point right away.

My 17 year old stepdaughter (who I will refer to as Becky) who is the love of my life is 7 weeks pregnant from a 21 year old guy who I like. He seems to treat her well and she adores him. They have been together almost a year now. I want her to keep her child because her baby is going to need her. The problem I have is her mother who is bound and determined to make my daughter give her baby up for adoption because my wife thinks she is an idiot for getting pregnant. I do not want Becky to cave into her mom's wishes.

Does Becky have any legal right to keep her baby or will her mother get her way? We live in Nebraska.

stormey44 · Feb 7, 2008, 08:13 AM

Well I think she haves a say in that when will she be 18?

Synnen · Feb 7, 2008, 08:18 AM

You can NOT force a woman (of ANY age) to choose adoption.

Any hint of coercion, and the judge won't even LET her sign the relinquishment papers.

Becky needs to see a counselor, though. She needs facts to make this decision HERSELF. It doesn't matter what you or her mother or her boyfriend or anyone else thinks--BECKY is the one that has to live with her decision (either way) for the rest of her life.

I placed my child for adoption at 17. It was the right thing for my child (and for me). Living with it every day since has been HARD, but I know she's happy and healthy, so it's worth it.

I know others who were pregnant as teens, and they kept their children. Again, every day is hard, and you have to face all the things you have to give up (like, for instance, a social life, or possibly going to college right after high school), but it's worth it to see your child's smile, and hear him/her say "mama".

But... BECKY needs to decide. Find a counselor NOT from an adoption agency to talk to her about adoption, and one to talk to her about keeping her child and the options open for her there.

It's great that you're so supportive! Believe me, Becky will look back and remember that.

stormey44 · Feb 7, 2008, 08:25 AM

I agree I had a baby at 15 and I keep him and he is doing great it was a struggle but worth it he is worth it and like synnen said she will have to give up a lot so that is up to her and I agree she will need some help making the decsicion but in the end it will be up to her

cuddlykid · Feb 7, 2008, 09:26 AM

Originally Posted by stormey44

well i think she haves a say in that when will she be 18?

November 11th. She is due on September 24th

cuddlykid · Feb 7, 2008, 09:28 AM

Originally Posted by Synnen

You can NOT force a woman (of ANY age) to choose adoption.

Any hint of coercion, and the judge won't even LET her sign the relinquishment papers.

Becky needs to see a counselor, though. She needs facts to make this decision HERSELF. It doesn't matter what you or her mother or her boyfriend or anyone else thinks--BECKY is the one that has to live with her decision (either way) for the rest of her life.

I placed my child for adoption at 17. It was the right thing for my child (and for me). Living with it every day since has been HARD, but I know she's happy and healthy, so it's worth it.

I know others who were pregnant as teens, and they kept their children. Again, every day is hard, and you have to face all the things you have to give up (like, for instance, a social life, or possibly going to college right after high school), but it's worth it to see your child's smile, and hear him/her say "mama".

But...BECKY needs to decide. Find a counselor NOT from an adoption agency to talk to her about adoption, and one to talk to her about keeping her child and the options open for her there.

It's great that you're so supportive! Believe me, Becky will look back and remember that.

I have never seen her so happy. Ever.

She is my whole world.