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    Angel84's Avatar
    Angel84 Posts: 5, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jan 16, 2006, 10:09 PM
    Hello again.. need some help!
    I'm a 21 year old female... just thought I would add that in don't think it makes a differenence. I have been talking on/off for almost a year to this guy who goes to the same college with me. I slept over with him once a couple of months ago when we first started talking and we didn't sleep together but he did go down on me. We are still talking now and we are supposed to hang out this weekend. I have feelings for him and I know he feels the same way about me too because he has told me this before so its more than inevitable that things won't happen when he spends the night. I know that he wants to go down on me again but I know he would not use a condom because he didn't the first time when we hung out all those months ago. I've been tested recently and know that I'm clean. So my issue is he would probably want me to return the favor to him but how do I tell him I want to use a condom if I go down on him w/o offending him because he didn't use one on me. :confused: :(
    letmeno's Avatar
    letmeno Posts: 215, Reputation: 23
    Full Member
     
    #2

    Jan 16, 2006, 10:31 PM
    Hey! I am very pleased with your decision to have safe sex. That is a must! This is a very very easy question to answere. If he feels offended about the fact that you want to use a condom... then maybe you shouldn't think twice about not giving him any sex rather it be oral or actual penetration. I am willing to bet if you stood your ground and said "NO condom no sex" He would be more than happy to 'strap up'. This is your health that you are obviously concerned about, and offending someone is the least of your worries. I think that he would actually even have more respect for you.
    Good Luck.
    PrettyLady's Avatar
    PrettyLady Posts: 2,765, Reputation: 332
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    #3

    Jan 16, 2006, 10:39 PM
    Angel, good for you for wanting your boyfriend to wear a condom. Some sexually transmitted diseases and infections such as herpes can be passed on by oral sex. Just explain to your boyfriend that it's important that you both take care of each other by using protection. If he doesn't want to wear a condom don't perform oral sex on him.
    nero2's Avatar
    nero2 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Feb 6, 2006, 10:50 PM
    I agree with u also to have safe sex. Using comdoms is one of them. I really want u to ask him to put on comdom because it may cause u to be pregnant , etc. U should not be afaid if u offend him because if he really likes u he will repect yr decisions.
    letmetellu's Avatar
    letmetellu Posts: 3,151, Reputation: 317
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Feb 6, 2006, 11:02 PM
    Angel84... You have had a couple of pieces of good advice heed them and don't give any thought about having sex of any kind without a condom. If I were a female and a guy that I didn't know very much about was going to go down on me I would insist that he use a dam. And there is no way that I would go down on him with out a condom. If you catch something from him you are not only looking at something that could be a imposition the rest of your life but something that could end your life in a very short time. Sex is great and there is a mental things that makes it better, maybe, with out a condom but you are young and you will find a life long partner that you can have that kind of sex with. Don't risk it now.
    bizygurl's Avatar
    bizygurl Posts: 522, Reputation: 110
    Senior Member
     
    #6

    Feb 7, 2006, 06:51 AM
    I agree with the others posts, you are doing the right thing and protecting yourself. I know there is no real easy way in telling someone to use a condom but you have too. Obviously safe sex is important to you whether it be oral or intercourse you do what you feel is right and don't let him convince you that you shouldn't use protection.

    If I were in this position I would tell him that your uncomfortable not using a condom and if its going to be a problem then I guess we aren't going to be having sex, period. If he respects you he will understand. If he gets ticked about it and gives you a hard time than he doesn't respect you.
    fredg's Avatar
    fredg Posts: 4,926, Reputation: 674
    Ultra Member
     
    #7

    Feb 7, 2006, 07:07 AM
    Hi, Angel,
    At 21 years old, you have your whole life ahead of you. Why risk some serious disease at such an early age?
    Research on the web can show you many, many, many different types of sexual diseases; not to mention pregnancy!
    Are you ready for any of that?
    As other answers have said, think about it... there should be NO question in your mind about not wearing a condom, don't do it without it.
    Also, even a condom is not a 100% guarantee what you will not become pregnant; even the manufacturers' say that.

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