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EuRa · Jan 22, 2008, 10:45 PM

I wonder if it's the same for all women, or does each woman differ? My sex drive is higher than my mates. Sometimes she's in the mood, often times she's not. So I'm wondering: What gets you ladies in the mood?

Background: Im 27, she's 26. We've been together for almost 2 years now, we see each other on the weekends, soon to move in together (April).

Ideas?

smoothy · Jan 23, 2008, 06:35 AM

Sorry if this seems rude, but at 27 you haven't figured this out yet?

The short answer is play to her needs and wants. What's those are is for you to find out. You will get as many answers as there are women.

talaniman · Jan 23, 2008, 07:56 AM

Pay attention, and she will give you a road map. The are all different in their wants and needs.

alyssarox32 · Jan 23, 2008, 08:48 AM

Hi Eura,

Here is a fact that you should know: Men's sex drive is higher then women's.

I am a 20 year old female and my sex drive is off the peak! I don't know if it has to do w/age or me as a person. I believe every woman is different when it comes to their sexual desires. Maybe she thinks that because you have been together for quit some time, 'making love' isn't all that important when it comes to keeping a stable relationship, even though it sure helps! Did you try talking to her about the situation?

There are lots of factors that can turn a woman on. For me, just being attracted to the person inside and out is a big turn on. Just knowing what you'r partner likes will more than likely turn her on. I get in the mood easier when I haven't seen my boyfriend for awhile. If you want to get into more detail then message me personally.

I hope this has helped you!

Fr_Chuck · Jan 23, 2008, 09:01 AM

Real Sincere feelings, once you can fake that you have it made

alyssarox32 · Jan 23, 2008, 09:07 AM

Hey Fr_Chuck,

What do you mean by that?

alyssarox32 · Jan 23, 2008, 09:53 AM

Oh yea, one great gift that women have is that they can tell when a man is faking it or not. When you are trying to give advice, give some that will actually work.

Choux · Jan 23, 2008, 01:57 PM

One thing that gets women in the mood for sex is exercise(but not to total exhaustion).

Nothing better than getting all the muscles going... sweat pouring... breathing heavily... being all in touch with one's body... excellent!

smoothy · Jan 23, 2008, 02:05 PM

You could just hand over your credit card... that will get a lot of them in the mood. Nothing like a shopping spree.

EuRa · Jan 23, 2008, 08:02 PM

Originally Posted by smoothy

Sorry if this seems rude, but at 27 you haven't figured this out yet?

The short answer is play to her needs and wants. Whats those are is for you to find out. You will get as many answers as there are women.

How can you respond with "you haven't figured this out yet", then go on to basically say it's different for all women! That's a catch-22!

So there isn't just one answer, eh? I know men's sex drives are larger. I'm 27, I'd prefer to do it 3-5 times a day, which I know won't happen. She's willing once a day, maybe twice if I'm a good boy. But I often feel like I'm forcing her to do it, rather than her being a willing participant, and I don't want to feel that way. It's not that she won't have sex, it's just that it seems I'm wayyyyy more into it than her. I don't get her crank going to well, if you know what I mean.

Nobody really gave an answer, other than exercise, and that it's in her wants and needs. What does that mean exactly? I was hoping people to say "use candles" or "buy such-and-such", etc... you know... something simple. :P Nobody said that.

Synnen · Jan 23, 2008, 10:53 PM

That's because there IS no simple answer.

How about asking HER?

Personally, about the only thing that would make me in the mood 3-5 times a day is winning the lottery, not having to work, having a maid to do all the housework, a personal trainer to keep me fit and feeling great about my body, unlimited shopping for clothes that make me feel sexy, and plenty of time together to spend slowly building the excitement up.

Unfortunately--work, and housework, and cooking, and paying bills, and gaining weight, and basically just having other things to focus on means that once a day is great for us--but it's more like 3 times a week.

And we don't even have kids!

simoneaugie · Jan 23, 2008, 11:27 PM

Well, 3-5 times a day was great when I was drunk. Now, I feel the pain. Aspirin 30 minutes before really helps. Women's bodies are made to take a lot, that doesn't mean that it feels good.

I heard a story about a young man who masturbated while hanging on a chin-up bar while banging his penis against the doorway. He had to retrain himself to respond to more gentle stimulation. I'm sure your banging is not that extreme.

smoothy · Jan 24, 2008, 05:46 AM

Originally Posted by EuRa

How can you respond with "you haven't figured this out yet", then go on to basically say it's different for all women!? That's a catch-22!

So there isn't just one answer, eh? I know men's sex drives are larger. I'm 27, I'd prefer to do it 3-5 times a day, which I know won't happen. She's willing once a day, maybe twice if I'm a good boy. But I often feel like I'm forcing her to do it, rather than her being a willing participant, and I don't want to feel that way. It's not that she won't have sex, it's just that it seems I'm wayyyyy more into it than her. I don't get her crank going to well, if you know what I mean.

Nobody really gave an answer, other than excercise, and that it's in her wants and needs. What does that mean exactly? I was hoping people to say "use candles" or "buy such-and-such", etc... you know... something simple. :P Nobody said that.

Simple... The original question honestly seems like one a teenager might ask. The answer to it that nearly every adult male knows is women are very difficult to figure out. Do many men know exactly what makes their woman tick? No. The question presented by the OP indicates he expected a simple answer.

And by the answers we gave, it is that quite literally. You have to know exactly what it is that makes her tick and cater to that. You can NOT possibly give a do exactly this, then do exactly that answer. This is like how do you mow your yard. There are a lot of ways to get there, and not everyone is going to do it exactly the same. Start in the rear, starting in the front, what pattern, what do you use etc, basically there is not one way it has to be done or can be done. But the result is the grass gets cut.

And the 3-5 times a day thing speaks volumes. People aren't rabbits.. Women aren't into that sort of thing. That's why so many of us older guys can get the attention of young women if we want to.

talaniman · Jan 24, 2008, 06:29 AM

A female that feels secure, loved, and wanted, will always be in the mood. Maybe not for the lust hump stuff, but the love making stuff. Breakfast in bed, or showing you care, goes a long way, and paying attention, is better than aspirin. Sometimes, just making a cup of coffee, and taking a walk will get her thinking how special you are. Everyone is different, so its important to know yourself, and the one your with, very well.

Wildflower47 · Jan 25, 2008, 07:51 AM

Umm if your interested 2-3 times a day and she's willing 1-2 times a day then your already doing something right lol.
Personally it's about right timing, right touch, stroking my hair, sensual touches, taking your time. If it's rushed then it feels too robotic to me and I'm not likely to orgasm.

smoothy · Jan 25, 2008, 08:46 AM

My thought is the 3-5 times a day thing sounds more like a 17 year old without a girlfriend than a 27 year old that does.

Any mature adult that understands women and does what it takes would be consuming at a minimum 5 hours per day if they wanted to go at it 5 times a day. Women just are not into get it in, get it off, get it out mindsets.

Any person that's doing this regularly 3-5 times a day at 27 is doing so by spanking the monkey. And at that rate he is flogging it pretty bad.

And if in fact he really is 27, and in fact does have a girlfriend I think its high time someone visits a psychologist because there is an obsession or addiction here that needs treatment.

Sorry if this comes across as harsh, but there is a lot that just isn't making any sense.

The story does not match the real world facts in this case. And the more I think about this the less logical it seems.

mraquino21 · Jan 25, 2008, 08:57 AM

I like to feel appreciated and respected. If I have an extremely long day and I'm beat I know I have to go pick up my daughter, help with her homework, do dishes, cook, clean, do laundry and anything that needs to be done for the following day like laying out clothes or making lunches. If I come home dreading working again until bed and my husband has dinner made the garbage taken out, dishes done and laundry in the process you better believe I will "reward" him for doing such a thoughtful and helpful thing to help me be able to relax and not have so much to do. It's the really little things for me.

Wildflower47 · Jan 25, 2008, 08:58 AM

Yup, my feelings too. There is no way this woman is getting pleased out of 1 min wham bamb sex... she's probably bored silly and that's why he isn't getting it as much as he wants. If your not going to put something in it for her then I'm betting she's getting turned off.
We women like orgasms too!!

EuRa · Jan 25, 2008, 11:01 AM

Originally Posted by Wildflower47

Yup, my feelings too. There is no way this woman is getting pleased out of 1 min wham bamb sex....she's probably bored silly and thats why he isn't getting it as much as he wants. If your not going to put something in it for her then I'm betting she's getting turned off.
We women like orgasms too!!!

I actually make sure she gets an orgasm first. She never gets one during sex, and for obvious reasons that you can imagine, I don't do it after. If I do her first with oral, she becomes more sensitive, and therefore craves sex more. It's not 1 min wam-bam, maybe 15-20 minutes. Sometimes 10 if we got to get food at the store. :P

EuRa · Jan 25, 2008, 11:04 AM

Originally Posted by talaniman

A female that feels secure, loved, and wanted, will always be in the mood. Maybe not for the lust hump stuff, but the love making stuff. Breakfast in bed, or showing you care, goes a long way, and paying attention, is better than aspirin. Sometimes, just making a cup of coffee, and taking a walk will get her thinking how special you are. Everyone is different, so its important to know yourself, and the one your with, very well.

I couldn't give you more reps talan, because I value your opinions so much already, but I do agree with you here. Thank you very much.