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    rachie's Avatar
    rachie Posts: 38, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Jan 13, 2008, 07:45 AM
    Lost my way
    Hey everyone...
    esp. any catholics/ priests out there?.
    I am having a hard time. I am a fallen away catholic, who has tried many different christian denoms since, only to return to the church I was raised in... I got married, and recently baptized our first baby catholic. My husband is not catholic however supports me in whatever I decide to do.
    My problem is, I have quit going to mass and fallen away from christianity almost completely... it is so hard for me I have so many questions. (maybe because I was a philosophy student and I think too much? ) the worst is the sex abuse by the priests... our so called fathers that we are trusting with our kids and our lives... how can the catholic church be the one true church if these priests are evil?
    For example, how can we believe the bible when it was written by MEN, with their own objectives in mind, and to make matters worse every denomination believes different verses mean different things... people twist the bible to say what they want it to say (for example, look at the killing throughout history in "jesus" or the "church's" name)
    Also, I was trying to convince my parents, also fallen away catholics, to return to church... when they asked me why I baptized my son and they don't agree with the catholic or any other faith any more, only the "bible"...
    Anyway I was trying to convince them to return to church, but I couldn't give a good defense...

    They said "we dont go to church because everyone we know there is a hypocrite. they say they believe one thing and yet live another way. "

    You know what after looking around, I found it to be true. My mother in law, a methodist who goes to church every Sunday, has been shaking up with her "boyfriend" for 10 years... many of the same people I see in church are also in the bars getting drunk over the weekend... not to mention all the movies they watch that depict immoral ways of life... everyone has sex outside of marriage... my sister in law is living with her boyfriend and has another kid by someone else, and she says her goal one day is to be a preacher! In her non-denominational church!
    I am not trying to judge people: make no mistake, I have done many things I am not proud of but I am trying to live the right way... doesnt the bible say something in 1John about "..if we say we know jesus, but go on living our sinful ways, we are lying, and are not His friends at all."
    ?
    I am just discouraged, because I here so many protestants bashing catholics, so many bible churches condemning other people, and I am so sick of hearing it that I don't know which church to go to anymore! I don't want to raise my son without faith, but I don't want to be a hypocrite either, and tell him to believe something that I myself can't even believe.
    Help please...
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Jan 13, 2008, 08:00 AM
    A few issues, first of course any sex abuse is too much sex abuse, and most certainly when covered up by the church, but for one, it is not that wide spread and while some happened, remember what hits the news is all of the cases over the last 30 years, so it seems alike a lot more. Also you seldom here on national news of the boy scout leaders, or the karate school teachers or the grade school teachers that abuse chidren, Or the other denominational people. It happends in all of them, we hear on the local news about many, just in the last couple of years, but the main difference is for some reason because they are not catholic priests it does not make the national news.

    And of course priests are just men, not saints no special powers and sadly some bad people find that hiding in the church is a better cover for them and many child abuses tend to try and find jobs such as the many I named above to be abel to work around children.

    Of course the bible was written shortly after Christs death by those who had personally knew Christ and they risk death for writing what they did.

    And a church needs to find and accept all of the bible, one verse has to fit in with the others, not any taken to stand on their own merit. Also one has to go back to the Hewbrew or Greek to be sure the right meanings are being used, plus you have to understand and study the customs at the time of the writing to know meanings, A word used today may have a differnet bibical meaning, if one looks at it closely.

    And you can merely invite people back to church, it is the Holy Spirit that has to convict them personally to search for the church.

    As for as "shacking up" there are people who sin and do wrong in every church, we can not allow the sin of church members to get in the way of our faith.
    In the end, the sins of the world can not or should not divide you from God. Look at Noah, in his day, the entire world was sinning, not another single person kept the faith, he could have easily went to the ways of the world, but he did not.

    So with us, we can not let the life and sins of others stand between us and our faith.

    And yes, but remember also, catholics bashed a lot of protestants for years, but most that do don't remember or care that it was the catholic and Orthodox churches that protected and copied the bible and even were the ones that help decide what books are in it.
    They merely attack because to accept means they have to be wrong in many matters.

    So you are merely allowing others and what they do in general to get between you and your relastinoship with God.

    A good confession and a mass may help you find a better closeness with God. Remember we find God in faith, and in calling on him, not by finding a way in the world, we are strangers here, not of this earth, merely visiting here for now.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jan 13, 2008, 01:07 PM
    What do you think is causing your suffering?
    Why do you think that religion is the answer to your suffering?



    Best wishes in the coming year,
    MoonlitWaves's Avatar
    MoonlitWaves Posts: 171, Reputation: 52
    Junior Member
     
    #4

    Jan 13, 2008, 02:31 PM
    Once again Chuck hit the nail on the head. Great advice Chuck.

    I wanted to respond as well because I too was where you are now as far as allowing others to come between me and God. I left church because of all the hypocritical goings on in the church. But then not so long ago God was on me hot and heavy letting me know I need to go back, I never should have left. This may not be the same for everyone, but I have a better walk in my Christian life when I go to church. It provides me with discipline of a sort. I am more apt to study God's Word when I go home from listening to the sermons. I focus on God which helps me to avoid habitual sins. I get through hard times better without getting so bent out of shape. I feel the spirit so much more because I am feeding it and growing spiritually. Going to church is just the right thing for me. I started back a few months ago and I now wonder why in the world I ever left in the first place. I try to keep it in my heart and mind to not allow others affect me. If ever I get to a point where my focus considering church leaves God and wanders to the goings on I will be sure to ask God for the help to overcome my faulty fleshly thoughts. Because they aren't spiritual.

    My point though, is don't let other people get in the way of the Spirit. You go back to church and you keep your focus on God. I believe that if you ask for it God will help take those thoughts out of your mind and allow you to focus on Him.

    Get back in there. I think you will be like me and wonder why you ever left in the first place once you find that joy again and you get back on fire spiritually. I'm still young, and so I am sure I will go through many more times of the devil trying to get me back out of church again. I just keep in mind that God is right there for me to ask for help to overcome the weakness that will have me consider it.

    Also remember this too... you have to answer to God for you and they for them. When you stand before God you won't be able to say that you didn't get your life back on it's Godly track when He was convicting you because you allowed what others do to affect you.

    Get back in there, God is not convicting you for funsies, Tara
    margog85's Avatar
    margog85 Posts: 241, Reputation: 19
    Full Member
     
    #5

    Jan 16, 2008, 01:35 PM
    Expose your children to as many religions as possible.

    Let them know that there is variation in belief, there are similarities between beliefs, and there are those who think it's all made up.

    Tell them what you believe, if you know at that point.

    If you don't know, tell them that, and explain why.

    Not belonging to a church doesn't equal not having any faith.

    Let your kids see the world as it is, see all the variety in religions and beliefs as they are, and in time they will draw their own conclusions.

    Till then, you'll have kids with a healthy, well-balanced, and totally open-minded perspective of religious beliefs.

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