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    christiana567's Avatar
    christiana567 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jan 9, 2008, 03:02 PM
    first timer on anal sex.want to try it need answers
    I'm 21 and my boyfriend of a long term relationship has been asking for anal for the longets but I'm scared it'll hurt... what are some things I should know... and should I use lube or a condom... and a really embarrassing question... does ''poop'' get on his penis =\
    terellowens's Avatar
    terellowens Posts: 123, Reputation: 9
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    #2

    Jan 9, 2008, 03:05 PM
    I just wouldn't tell him no if it is hurting...

    And yes poop is a possibility
    clafairey's Avatar
    clafairey Posts: 153, Reputation: 46
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    #3

    Jan 9, 2008, 03:08 PM
    Don't be pressured into it whatever you do. It does hurt at first sadly to say. If you actually want to do it for you, not just him, then yes, use both lubricant and a condom. Also make sure he takes it very slowly and to stop when you say.
    Take a look at this site: Anal Sex Tips

    Hope it helps
    ISneezeFunny's Avatar
    ISneezeFunny Posts: 4,175, Reputation: 821
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    #4

    Jan 9, 2008, 03:09 PM
    ... do it ONLY IF YOU WANT TO! Because if you're having any doubts about it, you'll stress about it and it won't be a good experience for you.

    Lube. Yes.

    Condom. Yes.

    Poop. Possibly.
    lil_pea07's Avatar
    lil_pea07 Posts: 75, Reputation: 6
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    #5

    Jan 9, 2008, 03:23 PM
    Everyone is giving advice on only doing it if she wants but did anyone ever think of telling her the possibility of serious infections?! Doing anal can cause serious infections. There is so much bacteria. Some of my friends have done it and gotten infections and they had to go to the e.r. there's more to think about than whether its going to hurt or if you will enjoy it or whatever. My advice is only do it if you want but if you do use a condom so keep the bacteria from getting contact with his genitals and before inserting his penis somewhere else in you take off the condom to prevent the bacteria from entering you. And when you are completely done make sure you bath immediately to kill any bacteria that may have gotten contact.
    clafairey's Avatar
    clafairey Posts: 153, Reputation: 46
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    #6

    Jan 9, 2008, 03:28 PM
    If you noticed, everyone has stated to use a condom, which is one of the main things. Also, if you read the site I included in my post, it states the safe way to practice anal sex.
    statictable's Avatar
    statictable Posts: 436, Reputation: 34
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    #7

    Jan 9, 2008, 08:18 PM
    Yes, yes and yes.
    Choux's Avatar
    Choux Posts: 3,047, Reputation: 376
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    #8

    Jan 10, 2008, 02:15 PM
    You are too young to have anal sex. That's my opinion. :)
    Xrayman's Avatar
    Xrayman Posts: 1,177, Reputation: 193
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    #9

    Jan 10, 2008, 02:28 PM
    Oh dear.
    EIFS EXPERT's Avatar
    EIFS EXPERT Posts: 126, Reputation: 8
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    #10

    Jan 10, 2008, 02:30 PM
    Did you ever have to poop and strained?

    I would imagine anal sex would be 1000 times worse. I also read that the chances of getting hemroids are greater for folks who have anal sex.

    If I were you I would go slow. Literally. :p
    kp2171's Avatar
    kp2171 Posts: 5,318, Reputation: 1612
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    #11

    Jan 10, 2008, 02:39 PM
    I'm a guy, fyi, so what I "know" of the woman's perspective is what I've read and what I've learned from talking to my partners and others about anal. Current partner has no desire for it, a previous partner enjoyed it occasionally. Generally, I think most guys are curious and most women aren't so interested. The girl that enjoyed it had a remarkable ability to bring herself to orgasm through self stim... so she was able to channel the sensations into a different orgasmic experience.

    The link provided by clafairey is good...

    Lube (warming is good), going SLOW, talking while trying are all important. The first time I had anal with my previous partner she said she was somewhat uncomfortable, and wouldn't have gotten off that time... whereas I almost did immediately... partly because of the sexual tension, partly because the sphincters contract so strongly it "grips" hard on the man. Almost instant orgasm.

    Read enough posts here and you'll find most women that post here haven't found it pleasurable, and there are reasons to be careful and concerned. Personally, as great as it felt, and as much as I wanted it, it doesn't interest me so much since I know my current partner isn't interested and wouldn't enjoy it. But... we've also had posts from people who have enjoyed anal for a long time with no physical issues reported.

    It isn't, in my limited experience, messy like you think it could be. But the point about cleanliness is absolutely true. Just as "improper wiping" after you go to the bathroom can introduce bacteria into your vagina, so could anal sex without proper caution. Anal followed directly by intercourse just shouldn't happen.

    Sooo... his desire isn't bad. Its normal curiosity. Your being scared is normal. And if that means he doesn't get it cause you aren't ready, so be it. Don't do anything you aren't wanting to do sexually.

    Be willing to talk to him about it without it being a fight... he's just curious and you just have to do what is right for you, even if that means saying no.

    Fyi... before you do anything, Google "anal sex" and read more about it. Being sexually informed is important. You'll find some good links within the first page or two of hits.
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
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    #12

    Jan 10, 2008, 03:19 PM
    Do it in the Shower. And use loob if you want to try it. And don't be shy. He will love everything about it. Evertyhing he sounds like he is very much into it, as for the whole poop thing he probable gets turned on of the thought of that
    lulu2912's Avatar
    lulu2912 Posts: 83, Reputation: 4
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    #13

    Jan 10, 2008, 03:46 PM
    It does hurt the first time and many more after that. It has been about 5 years since my husband and I tried it for the first time and only in the last year has it really become enjoyable for me. You definitely need to read all about safe anal sex and just remember to make sure and use a lot of lube (you will have to reapply during) and if it hurts just stop and try another time. And poop only happened once!
    annabanana_01's Avatar
    annabanana_01 Posts: 5, Reputation: 2
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    #14

    Jan 10, 2008, 03:55 PM
    Well I Think You Should Do It Only If You Want To! If You Decide To Do It Just Relax, Don't Thik Its Going To Hurt And Enjoy The Moment. The First Time I Did It Hurt But I Think Its B Cus That Was My First Time And All I Was Thinking Was 'is It Going To Hurt' Now Its Like A Natural Thing. And I Guess It Has To Do A lot With Being Comfortable With Yourself And Your Partner. ;) Second, Use A Lubricated Condom!! Also Tell Him To Try To Stick It In B4 It Get Hard That Way It Won't Hurt As Much.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
     
    #15

    Jan 11, 2008, 12:25 AM
    Anal sex can be fun, if you're turned on enough in the first place to enjoy it.

    Go VERY slow. Use LOTS of lube. Plan on washing up afterwards.

    I've had some VERY intense orgasms from anal---with a partner that knew what HE was doing. So... it's about trust, it's about a lot of foreplay---and yeah... don't be jumping from anal to vaginal intercourse. That's bad juju.

    And--be comfortable with it. If you can't relax, it's going to hurt like heck. You NEED to relax for penetration. If you aren't comfortable with it at ALL--as in, the very idea turns you off--then don't do it. Your boyfriend has plenty of other ways to get off with you.
    Kainy's Avatar
    Kainy Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Jan 11, 2008, 03:26 AM
    I must tell you that It hurts at first and I get hurt very easily. But you will get through it. It can actually be very satisfying.At first I did not want to try ,but later I enjoyed it. Poop is unfortunately a problem and can be very humiliating.
    nero2's Avatar
    nero2 Posts: 51, Reputation: 0
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    #17

    Jan 11, 2008, 09:19 AM
    Use A Lubricated Condom and my opinion is to lubricate it first then use the small finger to insert and move up and down until you are comfortable and then use two finger and so on. If you think that is big enough then start anal sex

    Anal sex cannot be rush need a lot of foreplay and make sure you are comfortable with it. Use more lubricant if you need to. Not to worry it will not be painful but don't force any thing to it. May be painful
    smoothy's Avatar
    smoothy Posts: 25,492, Reputation: 2853
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    #18

    Jan 11, 2008, 11:05 AM
    Slow steady and use lots of lube.. start with one finger then two and then three... like long foreplay. Don't dive right in. When you can relax with three fingers then you are ready :D unless you can mistake his member for a forearm :eek: . Then all bets are off. First time may still be uncomfortable, but it he takes it really slow while you adjust then you can find it's a very pleasurable activity. Key is patience on his part, and you being relaxed and getting comfortable before you dive right in and start. Now that time will get shorter with practice. Wife really loves this, because I take the time for her to get comfortable before going at it. And use lube lots of lube.

    If you are worried about poop. Time it to be about 1-2 hours after a bowel movement. The parking garage with be empty then. Try it when its full then you will find parking can be a problem.
    spadenavy's Avatar
    spadenavy Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #19

    Jan 19, 2008, 01:52 AM
    My personal advice is to get a small anal toy of some sort for yourself. Use it just like masturbating and do it yourself so you have control over the situation until you personally feel that you can handle it. It will hurt and feels awkward your first few times but you get used to it. Also find out if he would let you try it on him, most guys are not open to it but trust me if he is open to it he would love it. Plus then you can use a strap-on on him. Trust me the way your sex life will change is immense. Best of luck to you
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
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    #20

    Jan 20, 2008, 08:37 PM
    My advice to you is say NO and stick to your guns. This is a great way to get some pretty nasty diseases and there are a LOT of them out there.

    NO NO NO NO NO NO NO and more no.

    And if he goes out and does it with someone else and you find out... let him get the swell diseases as you are happily hooked up with another guy who doesn't want this.

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