[kp2171]

I've been a bad and selfish lover for the 2 years I've been married but I swear to make amends now.

From now on it's going to be about my wife's pleasure first and then mine (if she feels like it). You should buy a book like "She Comes First" or something similar and let him read it. It opened my eyes and changed my perception totally.

I was soooo naive about female sexuality before reading this book.

she comes first is a good book. It isn't a perfect "blueprint" or "recipe", so for those that want an exact step one, two, three... they are thinking wrong... but it does get you thinking about what can work and the proper mindset.

lets put it this way... I ran into the book at B&N and my partner skimmed... she read one section and said "this guy knows how to go down on a woman"... hmmm. Think I was interested?? Bought it on Amazon the next day. Wed had pretty good success orally before, but its been better since the read.

though I've believed for a LONG time that getting the woman to orgasm first through oral, or at least primed for intercourse, is the way to go most of the time, the book does a nice job of making you think a little...

if I did anything after reading that book and talking to my lover, it was I took a lot more time and went a lot slower and softer. By the time I'm at the cl!toris she should be damn near pulling me by my ears. =)

it shouldn't be treated as a sex bible... its just one of many good books that should be read.

but don't make it only about her pleasure... your partner wants you to WANT her... and that means she also wants to please you, even if you have been "selfish"...

please, please, please... don't just be her sexual butler. Please her, yes. But your getting sexual satisfaction from her will also pleasure her. How boring it would be to have a lover who only wanted to please you and not get pleasure themselves... just don't swing from one extreme to the other.

a healthy sexual relationship has balance... that means you get to focus on her, and you also get satisfied as well.