[TrueFaith]

Ok so I'm in a happy very happy relationship with a girl that really loves me.. kind of all I ever wanted =)

yeah joy right.. for some damn reason I keep thinking about my Xes and not just one but all of them.. I laugh to myself thinking they are not even half the girl that my one is.. they still pop into my head every now and then.. all the ones that have jerked me around and hurt me.. made me doubt myself in everyway... use me.. and not even look back.

So I think about them. I guess I just think of how the hell could they do that to me.. and how the hell could they lave me..

OK I have left a few and I'm not perfect in this by no means =) just strange that I keep thinking about the bad ones

Like ill just be sitting there then bang.. a date and time would come into my head.. were I'm with another girl. Its always of us laughing its so strange


anyway I'm sure this is normal and I know I should move on.. and forget about them.. etc etc.. And its not healthy and just be in the moment with the person you are with..

yet it still does not help they still come in =)

Thanks guys

Regards

[4answers]

If you are remembering more than one ex and the ones that hurt you, then you are doing what you are pre programed to do. Its natural and normal

Ever wondered how you never seem to forget the bad times but sometimes the good times fade away... Sucks - how can that be right, that does not make me happy.

Humans are pre programmed to remember bad situation, things or events linked to bad situations. It is a survival mechanism.

In our hunter gatherer time, if we came across an event like another person attacking us, hurting us or even if it was a creature like a spider biting us etc, our brain is programmed to remember these events so that if we come across a similar event we are able to prepare ourselves and take actions to avoid the same thing happening again and again. A survival mechanism.

It works the same if we are hurt in a relationship ! And when in a new relationship we go for a meal with the new girl, just like we did with the last girl... Bang, a memory trigger associated with the event that hurt us.

(Remember our instincts have not caught up with our modern way of living).

[talaniman]

I get haunted the same way, My exes pop in and out like they own me. I can only hope I haunt them from time to time too.

[little firefly]

I get haunted the same way, My exes pop in and out like they own me. I can only hope I haunt them from time to time too.

The same thing happens to me too... Sometimes at really weird times. I think it's normal for that sort of thing to happen to us all from time to time.

[George_1950]

You need a relationship exorcism. See a related post by Matteus, called "Why is unavailability a turn-on?", under Relationships.

[TrueFaith]

Thank you for your replys =)

nice to know I'm not alone hehe

Regards