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Mikarleana · Dec 13, 2007, 08:12 AM

I have 3 children and the "dad" is a deadbeat who is over 9 thousand behind in childsupport. I am remarried now and my husband wants to adopt the kids. Mind you, he had paid for these kids the past 3 years. My ex husband is very verbaly abusive to my 12 yr son. I need to know 2 things, is there any law in Illinois where if the "dad" is behind a certin amount in support his rights are terminated? And if not how can I get him to sign over rights for adoption with him not paying childsupport? Can someone PLEASE help me??

macksmom · Dec 13, 2007, 11:51 AM

Mind you, he had paid for these kids the past 3 years.

This just made me shudder... you don't pay for children. Paying for a child does not entitle anyone a place in the child's life.

That aside,

Rights will not be terminated on past due child support... that kind of defeats the point. If this were the case many people who didn't want to be responsible for their children could simply stop paying child support, have their rights terminated and get off scott free.
So no, his rights will not be terminated on that. He will continued to be sought out and will have consequences for non payment.

The only way to pave for adoption is to have him willingly relinquish his rights. You could let him know once the children are adopted, child support will stop. Other than that, there is nothing you can really do, it is up to him weather or not he wishes to relinquish his parental rights.

Mikarleana · Dec 13, 2007, 12:20 PM

So sory to make you shudder. If you don't pay for children then how do they go to school,play sports,etc.? OH IM sorry support.

oneguyinohio · Dec 13, 2007, 12:54 PM

The amount of support that a person is behind on doesn't make a difference as far as the parental rights to have a relationship with the child... other than it might be difficult if the parent is in jail for nonpayment.

The abuse on the other hand is another story. It is unfortunate that the biological father does not have a better relationship with the children. The oldest child might be of an age where he can make a decision if he wants any contact with the father. It would involve the courts in the process.

The idea to see if he will willingly relinquish his rights so that the adoption can happen is a good idea. You're not getting any money out of him anyway, and he would probably still be responsible for the back payments he already owes... good luck collecting, but all of that is for a lawyer to help you with...

ScottGem · Dec 13, 2007, 02:09 PM

As has been frequently mentioned in similar threads, its very difficult to get parental rights terminated, especially involuntarily. On the other hand, since he really doesn't want to pay support, he should be willing to relinquish to allow the adoption.

macksmom · Dec 13, 2007, 02:23 PM

Originally Posted by Mikarleana

So sory to make you shudder. If you don't pay for children then how do they go to school,play sports,ect.????? OH IM sorry support.

You pay for those thing, school, sports etc. You don't pay for your children, you financially support their needs and interests.
So just because your husbands "pays" for your children does not give him any more rights than their biological father.
The reason I say this, is because you need to understand this... it is going to be extremely hard to terminate the bio fathers rights... I can say with almost certainty that it won't happen.

The bio father will have to willingly relinquish his rights... if he refuses, your best bet would be to try and better the father-child relationship between them all.

Fr_Chuck · Dec 13, 2007, 07:49 PM

IF your new husband is willing to adopt, and if the bio father is willing to sign over his rights, then there will be no problem, and at that time, the child support will end. Because the new father is adopting.

But if he does not want to give up his rights, it will be had to make him.
You can start pushing harder collecting the money, perhaps losing his drivers license for non payment, or sitting in jail a few weeks for non payment may help make him either pay or decide signing over his rights is not a bad thing.

s_cianci · Dec 13, 2007, 07:57 PM

The amount of child support arrearages has no bearing on terminating his rights. If your husband wants to adopt then you file a motion with the Family Court. The father has to be given the opportunity to consent to or contest the adoption. If he consents, then the adoption goes through and no further child support is due, although you're still legally entitled to collect the arrearages that had previously accrued. If he contests the adoption, then it's highly unlikely that any judge will forcibly take away his rights. But if he's the deadbeat you suggest that he is, he'll probably be glad to consent to the adoption.