[jeffatl]

Well, pretty much what her friend told me "talking" means she is playing with the idea of getting back with him. Im not going to freak out about it, I just like things put on the table. I think I am just going to back off for a bit and let her go from here. I have pretty much done all I can from this point... meh.

[talaniman]

Jeff,hope you don't get worked up because a girl you like is talking to her ex. It is her business and you have no real right to question her on it and why should you care? Just do your thing and be your confident self and don't worry about the competition. You of all people know what happens when we overreact and start to get needy and whinny about things that we perceive as a threat to a relationship. Be cool and pay attention before you become possessive and insecure. Remember you can't control how others feel about you so go slow and keep your eyes open and deal with this situation maturely.:cool:

[kp2171]

Well, pretty much what her friend told me "talking" means she is playing with the idea of getting back with him. Im not going to freak out about it, i just like things put on the table. I think I am just going to back off for a bit and let her go from here. I have pretty much done all I can from this point.........meh.

OK this is different than your question. Talking and talking with possible intentions of getting back together are different.

Guess you still don't know if she had the friend tell you this or whether the friend was looking out for you or whether the friend was out to mess up your relationship...

Id not get panicky... it is what it is... but you're going to need to know one way or the other so sit back and see or work it into a conversation.

[fredg]

Hi, Jeff,
I think it's good just to back off some, see what happens, as you said.
You will get her best friend in trouble if you bring it up.
There is a chance she and her ex are still just "good friends", also a chance she wants him back. Never know.
Hang in there, and best of luck.

[Fr_Chuck]

I talk to my ex every week or so, after a period of her being that stupid ******** we understand we shared a lot of time together and have some common interests ( friends) now for a while she contacted me a lot, using all those "button" to try to control me or just make me unhappy one way or antoher. ( ex's are real good at that and seem to enjoy it)

You can't be afraid of an ex, anymore than the new guy at that bar, each of us will have friends and people we talk to that is not known to each other.
The fact you know must mean she is not keep ing it a secret.

Also you are just "talking" even if you are dating, have people not heard that dating does not mean engaged, people unless they are committing to each other are free to date others is they wish. One date ( and does not even sound like a real date) does not a commitment make.

[Wildcat21]

I don't think it's a big deal - they are an ex for a reason - it was broke. It wasn't fixable.

Jeff - what do I Always say - YOU CAN'T WORRY ABOUT OTHER GUYS. Especially early on (first 6 to 9 months). There will ALWAYS be other guys IF she is a great gal. You can't worry about them. If you are secure - you don't care... worrying about other guys is insecure and needy - a huge turn off and she will leave. No question.

Don't bring it up - I ACTUALLY THINK IT'S HER FRIEND CAUSING TROUBLE. There A LOT friends of girls that will do ANYTHING to break up there friends relationships. Her friend should have never brought it up because it really isn't an issue until you are very exclusive. Women, for the most part, are jealous of their friends relationships. MANY women actually don't want to see their friends happy - they also HATE that you might take time away from 'their' friendship time.

[jeffatl]

Thanks guys. I think I am just going to leave this one alone. Im not really worried about this other guy, and if they do get back together, I will just find another gal. I guess the reason they broke up was because she was tranfered in her job to another state. This guy STILL lives pretty far away from her, and so do I. I don't really want to get into a LDR anyway. I think I will just keep things as friends until or if she comes back.

[Wildcat21]

Long Distance is really hard. Sometimes you maight not hear from that person for a week or two. It takes a lot of work, no question.

I would advise reading all the free articles at www.lovetactics.com.

[blueiman]

Yes, I agree with the above advise. Try not to think about the other guy's. Don't put that in the relationship/friendship you have. Let it go and let time take care. Good luck.

[s_cianci]

It sounds like you're not very happy with this arrangement and rightly so. I wouldn't bother confronting her about it ; you know the truth, courtesy of her best friend and that's what's important. Just click your heels and walk away without any fanfare or explanation.

[Wildcat21]

Confronting her will only bring bad - look for her signals when you talk with her. See if she is still interested. Keep her in the game - she's allowed to see other guys.

The only time you'd bring it up is if you thought you were exclusive.