4yrs. Ago they were mean to me..

china_mm019 · Dec 6, 2005, 11:27 AM

Hello, I graduated from junior high four years ago and there were someguys that they used to make fun of me and they didn't like me, because I wasn't in their "group". Now four years they are, well they want to talk to me, four of the guys likes me and I don't know what to do, should I talk to them or just ignore them like they used to. :confused:

nymphetamine · Dec 6, 2005, 11:55 AM

Honey I know exactly where you are coming from. Little.How do these guys act now? Maybe they grew up since then and they are really ashamed of the way they treated you. I was fortuante enough to see one guy that I remembered from junior high and he couldn't hardly even speak when he saw me because he felt so bad for what he had done and I accepted his apology but I totally blew him off when he asked me out because I was still so angry at the way I was treated by him and his friends. I sometimes wish I had not been so hard on him and given him a chance. So just find out just what type of people these guys are and talk to them about what happened. It is very tempting to do the I'm hot now but you can't have me thing isn't it?

s_cianci · Dec 6, 2005, 06:30 PM

4 years is a long time and they may have matured a lot since then. You should probably start by giving them the benefit of the doubt. Wipe the slate clean and start over. If they are still the same way they were 4 years ago, you'll find out soon enough.

CaptainForest · Dec 6, 2005, 09:09 PM

The question is DO YOU want to talk with them? They most likely have changed, the question though is wheather or not you wish to talk to them. No one can answer that but you.

But you should try and give them a second chance, and if they botch it again, then I say walk away for good.

jeffatl · Dec 6, 2005, 09:27 PM

High school guys are immature at best, I know I was. The question you have to ask is, what do you stand to lose/gain from their friendship. They probably liked you and just had no idea what to do about it, some guys are like that. You are young, expand your friend base, that NEVER hurts.

rkim291968 · Dec 7, 2005, 01:46 AM

I don't think they matured so much. Rather, their hormone kicked in and they are seeing you in different light (potential date, etc). Beware. :D

DJ 'H' · Dec 7, 2005, 02:03 AM

It all depends how badly they treated you. I was treated badly by many guys at Secondry school - I see them out now and they are all over me. I don't really pay much attention because I don't see that they have really changed that much. It's just the girls that used to be interested in them aren't anymore - they are not seen as "The Popular Crew" anymore so they are now looking else where. Plus I am very outgoing & bubbley and they can see that I have an awful lot of friends - who knows what goes on inside their heads - I personally choose not to bother with them.

It all depends on the situation - they may be genuine - only you know that?

Trust your instincts but best to act with caution!

Chery · Dec 7, 2005, 03:00 AM

Do you nave new friends of your own? I'm sure that you've developed (blossomed) since then and they probably went through all the other flowers in their 'group' and are looking for something new, so please beware! Don't give up your friends for them, and don't let them talk you into anything you don't feel like doing. You make the rules whether you want to have anything to do with them, and yes, I would expect an answer as to why they did treat you the way they did then. If at least one of them says 'I'm sorry' and starts explaining, I'd give him a chance, but the other's can keep on trucking. It's your show now, and you keep center stage, be a little kind to those dummies, but don't let them ever get the upper hand again. Life goes on and in a few years, you probably will not even remember their names or what they looked like. Check out how they act towards other girls, ask questions first before going any further. You survived without them this far, you can continue to do without them if necessary. There is so much still ahead of you in life, enjoy it.

Keep on blossoming, and Happy Holidays!

fredg · Dec 7, 2005, 05:32 AM

Hi,
The question is, do you like them? You said they liked you now, but how do you feel about them?
What happened was 4 yrs ago. People change, start growing up in both mind and body. If you like them, then talk with them. If you don't like them, then leave them alone.
What someone did yrs ago really doesn't matter now. They have seen they were wrong, and now want to be friends with you. It's up to you.
Best of luck, and don't be like they were then.

Chery · Dec 7, 2005, 06:00 PM

Originally Posted by fredg

Hi,
The question is, do you like them? You said they liked you now, but how do you feel about them?
What happened was 4 yrs ago. People change, start growing up in both mind and body. If you like them, then talk with them. If you don't like them, then leave them alone.
What someone did yrs ago really doesn't matter now. They have seen they were wrong, and now want to be friends with you. It's up to you.
Best of luck, and don't be like they were then.

Absolutely right, it's your choice. Just weigh the pros and cons, what it will change in you, and go from there. Some girls lead the guys in their past who treated them badly, on, just to eventually get revenge. I hope you are not like that - it's not worth your time or energy and won't make you any happier. Again, good luck, and enjoy your future.

mikestorm · Dec 14, 2005, 07:42 PM

China, I'm a big subscriber to karma. If I were you I wouldn't give them the time of day. Don't be mean, but don't acknowledge them either.

If four guys in one group all like you at the same time, it sounds to me like you have no problem turning guy's heads, so don't waste your time with those that were mean to you in the past. At the risk of sounding cliché, there are plenty other fish in the sea.