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sdc719 · Nov 21, 2007, 10:14 PM

My 4 year old son has his father's last name and he has basically abandoned this child. And he will not give up rights and is not authorizing a last name change. Is it okay for my son to go by my last name in school? I understand that on legal documents he must go by his legal last name. It's very difficult for me when my son asks why me and his sister have the same last name.. he feels so left out and gets depressed.

bushg · Nov 21, 2007, 10:26 PM

Yes, It is OK for him to use your last name for school.

sdc719 · Nov 21, 2007, 10:29 PM

Originally Posted by bushg

yes, It is ok for him to use your last name for school.

Thanks, but you don't think the teacher's would have an issue with this? He is in Pre-K and although I was assured they were only going to use his last name.. he has been bringing home papers to trace his full name on. Do I just let the teacher know the next school day that he will go by another last name?

bushg · Nov 21, 2007, 10:34 PM

I would send a note letting them know, I would go into the office and make the change on the enrollment forms as well. I would also include my phone number at the bottom of the note. If you feel like sharing why he is going to be using your name, then do so.

Questionshelp · Nov 22, 2007, 10:33 AM

Yes you would have to. It's by law. You can on the other hand send a letter to the head office of education to ask if it is at all passable to do so. As fare as I am aware you need to use the given name.

JudyKayTee · Nov 22, 2007, 10:39 AM

Originally Posted by Questionshelp

Yes you would have to. It's by law. You can on the other hand send a letter to the head office of education to ask if it is at all passable to do so. As fare as I am aware you need to use the given name.

Know of a similar situation in which the child's birth certificate must be presented at time of admission to school and that is the name in which the child is enrolled. School would not make an exception because that name is the child's legal name.

I'd be afraid that using one name here and another name there will only lead to legal and medical confusion.

I use my maiden name professionally and my married name socially and legally and it is one endless explanation.

Questionshelp · Nov 22, 2007, 10:44 AM

What JudyKayTee said is so true. But you could use a nick name of some sort to help with this issue.

bushg · Nov 22, 2007, 11:28 AM

My son is a senior in high school, his legal name is my maiden name, he wanted to use his fathers last name when he was in kindergarten and has used it all of these years. No problems, he has even taken the ACT twice. His school Id has his dads name on it. Btw I am married to his dad. He plans on changing his name soon, that's fine with me.

ScottGem · Nov 22, 2007, 11:30 AM

US law allows a person to use any name they want as long as there is no intent to defraud. You have to present the birth certificate, but you can tell the school that she will be using your name. There is nothing illegal about it. If they insist ask them to show any rules or statutes that support it.

Fr_Chuck · Nov 22, 2007, 11:42 AM

The real issue will be latter when he graduates, his drivers licesne, his SS card and other info will have his real name, not sure how many jobs will believe this other name he graduated with is really his high school dipolma,

Also since college will require student loans, and normally formal legal name, will a high school dipolma with another name hurt him getting him ?

Also for our schools, a birth certificate and social security card are required to enroll the child, so not sure how you can use another name now adays

Questionshelp · Nov 22, 2007, 11:50 AM

Thank you Fr_Chuck. I would not agree more.

JudyKayTee · Nov 23, 2007, 09:13 AM

Originally Posted by Questionshelp

What JudyKayTee said is so true. But you could use a nick name of some sort to help with this issue.

I don't think you can use a nickname for the last name -