[JoeCanada76]

Why is miscarriage not considered by many work places or people to be a process of mourning and is bereavement. Some manager at my work told me it does not fall under bereavement because the baby was not alive outside the body.

[RickJ]

I am sorry to hear this. My wife and I went through the same thing. I know your sorrow.

Strength and confidence in your faith is your refuge.

[fredg]

Hi,
It is unfortunate that this is common practice among companies. Even though it is a death, it is not treated as such by many workplaces.

[Fr_Chuck]

It is the lessened value that has been placed on all life. And the fact that unborn babies have been given by society no value what so ever, just a blob that can be thrown out if the mother does not want it.

Not that it is, it is a living human being and the loss of that baby is as bad as one that is already born and as real to the loving mother.

The "movement" in society today is for the personal freedom and personal rights with no feelings for others in general.

We have been forced in soceity to accept and work under the beleifs of a minority in fear of law suits and being called names by others in society.

And also bosses and companies normally don't really care for any of their workers, once you are no longer an assest to them, you are merely tossed to the side and someone else hired in your place.

If you need the time off, look at getting your doctor to help you get medical time off because of the medical condition.

Time to grieve is needed for this loss

[Fr_Chuck]

Yes I was answering it from the view point of the mother, but yes the father also.

It is a very sad thing in American culture, even with the older born children the father is expected to "be tough" to "be a man"
The silly sterieo type that someone started years ago.

Even when so many of the serious family illness and other situations happen, the business world does not easily accept men taking off work.
And those that do often find their career shortened or they get stuck in a dead end position.

[lilfyre]

I don’t know why they do this, I had three miscarriages before I finally had my daughter, and I could only take it as a sick day. My husband and I called them the sickening days because the hole thought of what our employers thought of bereavement made us sick, the loss is truly great and rips at your heart and it is the same as losing a family member, because it is a family member, my deepest sympathy goes to you and yours, Donna

[JoeCanada76]

Thank you Donna,

It is heart wrenching, heart breaking and it sickening how employers treat us. It is not right and something should be done about it. I went as far as communicating with government and employement rights. Do not know if they will do anything but makes me feel better. Wrote a long letter to the manager and told him what I thought. Even to this day thinking about it is very hard. Thank you for your post and support.

Joe

[lilfyre]

Thank you Donna,

It is heart wrenching, heart breaking and it sickening how employers treat us. It is not right and something should be done about it. I went as far as communicating with government and employement rights. Do not know if they will do anything but makes me feel better. Wrote a long letter to the manager and told him what I thought. Even to this day thinking about it is very hard. Thank you for your post and support.

Joe

You are so very welcome, I thought that we were the only ones it had bothered; it is sad but nice to know that we are not the only ones that felt this way.

[JoeCanada76]

They actually told me it was not really considered a loss because it was not alive outside the body. It enraged me. There are so many emotions we were going through and to have an Team Member Services personel say that to me was unbelievable, I even had to get a doctors note to prove the reason why I was not at work.

Anyway, I thank you again but God knows you before you are even created in the womb. That means that our babies are alive as soon as the baby is conceived. Our baby had a heart beat and moving around. It is so much stress the doctors and hospitals and the scares of the baby not surviving and it actually happening. We were in and out of hospitals and doctors for a week. We actually had one doctor say the baby is probably not normal and not going to survive just by an blood test. The next day we had an ultrasound and the baby was strong with a good heart beat. All the stress and sitting waiting for doctors for hours and going through tests and so forth can not help the baby environment.

I just pray to God that whenever we do get pregnant again that we will have a full term baby and actually be able to hold our baby in our arms and have a full life here. Thank you again and may God bless you.

[nymphetamine]

Because its not alive outside your body? What kind of junk is that. You wait for this child all yourlife. You tell everyone"im pregnant" and they are happy for you. Then boom its gone. You develop emotions for this child that is apart of you. No it was not alive in your body but it was alive in your heart.

[Katiy]

You can always pray to the child. I am sorry for what you have been through.

[ranieri]

2nd it is because of the majority vote of the uncaring terrificaly wealthy males (who get free medical care and leave as needed) in office, that are not privy to the female physically or emotionally. If it can't be varified on black and white paper then to them it does not exist. That everone voted into office to take away our rights because they are to lazy to make decisions about us keeping our power for the people and by the people.

1st it is because of the abortion laws that are in place. They figure if it is OK to kill in one instance a so called non-living tissue or whatever they try to pass it off as. Then how can it be so heart wrenching to lose it naturally.

You and I know what the difference is! But that is how screwed up a lot of our laws are. Rules on top of rules. They make rules about rules already in place. Woman depending on circumstance mind you, don't want to feel guilty about the abortion decision, to kill.
I believe in choice. Woa getting a lil' off topic.
But that is where miscarriage misses out. Government says you can't have it both ways. Is it living or no. Black or white, you know they don't want any gray. Peace ranieri

[nymphetamine]

You know what it is. Those men and then there's the women who haven't had any children they just don't know what it feels like because they haven't had the experience. They don't have that love that naturally comes with carrying a child inside of you. I think the daddys develop love toward that child before its ever born. But unless someone can magically transport themselves in to your body they don't know how you feel. Its like this nurse told me one day that a lot of male doctors think that womenhave no feeling in their cervix. Well I sure the heck can feel mine so keep back with that cold metal thingy!