[chelsea123]

Okay I've been with this guy for five months and were engaged, but for like the past couple months he's totally changed he never cuddles with me anymore, he won't talk to me about anything, he never wants to have sex, no matter how hard I try, he doesn't help me with my anxiety problems anymore. He use to always cuddle with me, he use to always want to have sex, if I was having any problems or anything emotional I could always count on him to make me feel better, I felt safe, but now I don't feel safe anymore, I don't feel loved, ill cry all the time even in front of him sometimes and he will just sit there, and when I try to talk to him he won't say anything back, he tells me he's stressed but its just been going on so long and it seems to be getting worse. He will also act happy and nice to everyone else but is so mean to me, I'm so upset and depressed, what is going on or what should I do! I don't want to lose him...

[jolienoire]

My opinion, maybe you made him too much the focus of your happiness now your dependent on him to validate your happiness.. What do you do for fun? Do you have any hobbies? DO you have girlfriends? What are you doing for leisure? Does he hang with his friends? Sometimes, when we don't feel as loved as we should feel it's because of our own insecurities... But also men sex drive does cease when they are stressed it is true that men sex drive decreases when their stress levels increase... You need not to put anymore stress on him by having episodes or crying outburst... How can he tell you anything right now when you're an emotional mess?? He is being considerate in not adding more stress to you by telling you all his problems. Sex doesn't validate the love you have for each other sex is only an accesorry to being in love and shouldn't be confused with love.. We do that at times.. We often think that if we have more sex it shows us our mate loves us more its not the quanity of the sex but the quality of the sex when you do get intimate..
Take a deep breath, do something that you like, get friends... go to the gym, find other things that will make you happy and at the end of the day come home to your man with a better attitude

I hope I helped..

[linds03]

I would seriously give this guy an ultimatum... 1.we go and get some counseling together or 2.we're done, engagement off. It' rough, but he is not treating you fairly for whatever reason. His behavior is strange and a little suspicious to me. It sounds like he may be un sure or pressured about the wedding. What he needs to realize is that marriage is based on communication... the very thing he is lacking right now! This is his problem and he needs to fix it. I understand you don't want to lose him, but think about the alternative... a very unhappy marriage that will eventually lead to divorce. Put this guy in his place.

[Rockstar714]

I went through the same thing with my ex. Everything was fine between us and then all of a sudden he did a 180. Didn't want to cuddle, wouldn't talk to me, didn't want sex (no matter how hard I tried), didn't want to be seen in public with me, but didn't want me to leave, said it was just because he was stressed. Turns out he was cheating on me with 4 or 5 other girls. I'm not saying he is, but the sudden change could be the guilt he's having because he doesn't want to hurt you, but he is by not being honest with you. My best advice is that if you're already feeling like this and you've only been together for 5 months that you should get out now. If you're not happy and the honey moon phase really shouldn't be over yet, something isn't right and you should find someone that REALLY appreciates you.

[Sdjosh]

I'm not exactly sure I agree that this is his problem so much. If you have anxiety problems and other issues that you are depending on him to help... cure... work through then he is probably overly stressed. He may even start to resent you for those issues. Im sure he loves you and wants to help but it can be a big burden on someone to take care of someone's issues. He may just be tired of the rollercoaster.

The best thing may be to get some outside assistance in this matter. Get some counseling for yourself and don't put the burden on him so much.

[peggyhill]

I would get some counseling just for you, and I would also go to marriage counseling as a couple. I am going with my fiancée right now. At the church we will be getting married at, you have to do the premarital counseling for a month. I didn't think we needed it at first, but it has really helped us! We've been able to communicate better, and I think we are both less stressed. It sounds like there is something going on with him, stress could be the cause. I think counseling might help him open up more and deal with his feelings. Work through it now, before you get married. It's better not to bring a bunch of issues into a new marriage. Hopefully, he will agree to go and you guys can get to the bottom of this. Good luck!

[kanicky73]

I don't think she needs to jump to all kinds of conclusions right away and dump this guy. This is why the divorce rate is as high as it is because nobody wants to talk anymore!! What I think you need to do is get yourself together, sit down with him and talk. Tell him to be open and honest about anything no matter what it is, you will figure out what to do about it. If he then tells you that he has changed his mind, then you have your answer. Communication is the key here, but a guy won't open up and talk to you if he feels he will be attacked for his answers. You need to approach him in a nonemotional, non threatening kind of way.

[cerisa]

Maybe having someone sit in front of him and cry is not his idea of a fun date. Don't know, call me crazy, but relationships should be a two way street, give and take. If he has been doing the giving, I would think that gets old. Have you been diagnosed? Get professional help if you have anxiety and emotional problems. He is not qualified to be your counselor, and it is not fair to him to burden him with that.