[J_9]

There are many of us like this now NW, but there are still many, including my neighbors all around me, who are still of the old mindset that the school should do the paddling. It's just an old school school of thought.

[squackmaster]

I would never want the school to paddle my children. But I would expect something to be done if they hit another child and urinated on a wall in the school. Maybe you should look into why your child feels it's OK to go to the bathroom on the wall. Forget the attorneys... just straighten your son out and send him back to school. For whatever reason you did sign the form saying you approved the paddling. So there really shouldn't be a problem.

[CHERIE_LABAT]

Thank you to everyone for your response. I've contacted several attorneys and can not find one due to they are scared of being black balled and said the same would happen to me. I think the teacher does has a personal problem with me from 4 yrs ago. Truthfully it was not even to do with me but I went to the scene of a wreck for support to my best friend. Her son was the driver which he was 17 at the time but the teacher pulled out in front of him, he topped the hill and hit her infant son was in the front seat of the car in a carrier but not strapped in the carrier and the seatbelt wasn't strapped either. The baby was ejected and did not make it, due to this woman's neglect. I was concerned from the get go about him being in her class. I figured she probably would not put it together. I don't even remember seeing her at the scene.
Everybody acts like I'm making to big of a deal. This is my baby it is a big deal. I'm so mad I can't hardly stand it. I don't know what else to do. School board is trying to kind of brush me off and telling me to just let it be and they would be no more problems.
If anyone knows of anyone that might could help please let me know, I have pictures and the consent form that I signed that clearly states to call first each incident. I also went talked to the teacher the day after he was paddled and sent a little note stating he is not to be paddled at all. I think she did it for meanness. I don't want money I want her and the principals job. They don't deserve to be in charge of themselves much less children.

[bushg]

Then call your states captiol, there should be someone in charge of education there. Better yet make copies of all you have and send them. Tell them if the issue is not resolved that you will get a lawyer. You may have to get one, try the next town over or the next county. Don't let this slide.

[N0help4u]

That happened with me with Child Protective services I had pages of things against them and as soon as I mentioned CPS to any lawyers they quickly showed me the door.

There should be something you can do. Hope you figure it out. Could you take it to somewhere in your state capital?
Like I said if you had whipped him half as bad the school would have been mandated to turn it into CPS and you would have lost your son. Yet they do that and "IT is NO big deal"

[oneguyinohio]

I've got a 10 year old son, and if anyone ever paddled him, they better be prepared to get a whippin of their own! I know different people have different philosophies on that, but I don't believe in it. I have never had to do it for my son although I did threaten him with it once when he was biting other kids and was old enough (5 I think) to know better. I talked to him and told him what I would do if he bit another kid, and how that was hurting other kids so if he did it again I would have to punish him with a spanking... I then had to explain to him what a spanking was because he had never had one. I told him I didn't want to do it but that I also did not want him hurting other kids. Thankfully, he never did it again!

I was paddled and whipped with switches, belts, hands, flyswatters, yardsticks, and a number of other things as a child, and remember thinking even as I was being whipped, that it would never be done to my child!

I'm not being critical of your choice to paddle, but only hope you'll consider other means of punishment and "instructional correcting" for your child. All I ever learned from getting hit is that people could hurt you if they got mad... It's a wonder I didn't add to that by thinking that it was OK to hurt people when you were mad at them for something.

DOES your child have a behavior problem or learning disability? If so and that is getting him into trouble at school perhaps he needs an assistant at school to help him remember the proper way to act... only asking not judging him... maybe he was just showing off or something when he went on the wall?

I also agree that since you did initially sign the paper giving permission for the spanking, then perhaps there was some confusion in the paper work getting to the principal. Your son is out of her room now so that should no longer be an issue, but if you want to continue with a lawyer and such you may have to go outside of your area to find one willing to get involved. You could call the police and all that stuff, but since you have to live in the community, it may lead to more trouble down the road.

Have you thought about volunteering at the school and getting involved with things and people there personally? So that you are not viewed as an outsider of sorts but rather a liaison with them to work on issues?? Make yourself valuable to them rather than a problem to be dealt with?

Also, how do other parents feel about the principal and the paddling at the school? Do any of them have the same issues as you? If so, it might be easier to get the board to listen to a group of concerned parents...

[jillianleab]

From the reading I've been doing about paddling in schools, it seems the teachers and administrators have special protection under the law, which is why they can't be brought up on child abuse charges. I would write a formal letter once more to the school; give one to the admin office (principal and vice-principal), the guidance counselor, and all instructors who interact with your son stating that under NO circumstances is he to EVER be paddled. Make sure the letter is dated and signed by you and if you can get a witness to go to the school with you to see the letter being handed out, that's even better (that way they can never claim to have not received it). Then I would look into moving your son into another class with a new teacher.

As far as lawyers not wanting your case, keep trying and move up the ranks. Send a letter and the pictures, as well as other documentation to the school board. Send it to your county representatives, district representatives, hell, even your state representatives. Talk to other parents and see if anyone else has issues with the situation as it happened to your son and if they have encountered such things as well. Go to school board meetings and speak out. If getting the teacher and principal fired or at least reprimanded is important to you, don't stop until it happens.

Good luck to you,

[Tuscany]

I would amend the form that you sent in that allowed him to be paddled. Send in a new note that is notorized that states you DO NOT want your child paddled. As a teacher in NY State I find this whole issue barbaric and inhumane. Why any school would want to paddle a child or why a parent would want a teacher to discipline their child in that manner is unknown to me.

[Fr_Chuck]

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct their behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't believe parents who want their child running wild and not proerly disciplined.

[Tuscany]

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct thier behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't beleive parents who want thier child running wild and not proerly disiplined.

I agree with you on one thing Fr. That parents don't want their child running wild. But, I can tell you that I was NEVER hit as a child and I did not run wild. My parents taught me to have a healthy respect of those older then me without the use of force.

As a teacher I would not feel comfortable hitting another person's child. Spanking will forever be a debated issue, those that believe in it, and those that don't. I believe that spanking has no place in the classroom.

[NeedKarma]

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct thier behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't beleive parents who want thier child running wild and not proerly disiplined.

Where is this place where you live that the children are running around wild in the classroom? It's up to the parents to discipline and raise children properly, it's up to the teachers to teach.

[Tuscany]

Need- I need to spread the love, but I agree. And as a teacher thank you. Our job is hard enough. And boy if I hit a child I think I would feel guilty.

As a side note, I teach at a school for children with emotional, behavioral and learning difficulties and we have never hit one of our students. However, our students do not run wild. They have a respect for the teachers, the environment, and administration. We teach them to resolve issues without force.

[excon]

Hello again:

Some day we may rid ourselves of the fantasy that hitting children produces healthy adults.

Of course, we live in a society where ADULTS who hit each other (and go to war on one another) ARE considered healthy. So, our training appears to be working...

Oh well, one can hope.

excon

[jillianleab]

I would say they want to paddle a child to correct thier behavior, to keep disipline in the class room and to raise a child in a good manner.

I can't beleive parents who want thier child running wild and not proerly disiplined.

That's making the assumption the only way to discipline a child is by hitting them. It's also making the assumption parents who do not strike their child allow them and want them to run wild.

I'll give you this - there are parents who are "free style" who allow their kids to bounce off the walls, disrespect everyone they choose and never correct their behavior. Those parents are doing their child a disservice. But there are also parents who only have control of their child because their child is terrified of them. I've seen kids like that, it's very, very sad. Those parents are doing their child a disservice as well.

But this isn't about how a parent disciplines - it's how the school disciplines. The school's job is to teach, not to beat. There are plenty of other punishments that schools can give which don't involve laying a finger on the child.

[CHERIE_LABAT]

If it was your child you would feel different. How simple minded could someone be? Your child is your responsibility 24/7 even at school, friends, family or home. Were you abused as a kid or do you abuse your kids?

[CHERIE_LABAT]

I feel the same way. At times I will spank my son but with hand or a fly swatter. My son is very well mannered, polite, and pretty good about minding. He has been in preschool for 2 yrs and even that teacher was shocked.

[CHERIE_LABAT]

I never really thought he would be spanked. He was paddled for hitting another child and urinating on the bathroom wall. I feel that both of these things he probably wasn't the only child doing it. Not that I think its OK, I feel it wasn't just him

[N0help4u]

CHERIE_LABAT : I've never been wild about the paddling in school, but I also don't think its fair if 4 kids get in trouble for the exact thing and 3 are paddled and 1 is not, that makes things unfair and would be controversy over that.

I agree BUT what I see is bully picks on kid and has kid in tears. Kid tries to defend himself and both get punished. I think that is victimizing the victim twice and the schools do it because they can't be bothered sorting 'who done what' out.

[CHERIE_LABAT]

To answer a few of the questions, my son has been in preschool for 2 yrs before starting kindergarten. He doesn't have any learning disabilities, in fact he scored way above level. The only problem he's ever had in preschool was that he likes to talk your head off and he would load up his shoes with rocks to bring home. Were not quiet sure why he liked the rocks, but he knew the teachers would check his pockets for the rocks so that's why he put them in his shoes. Every day when I picked him up he would dump his shoes as soon as he got in the car. He was never paddled then, and he was in a Baptist Church preschool. Since then he has been put in a different class where he is doing excellent, and even received a brag letter one day for being so good and helpful and cleaning up some trash while he was out at recess. He is my baby so he is spoiled, but he is very well mannered, respectful and polite. He goes to church regular and he does know what is acceptable and what's not. I just feel that the problem was just with this teacher. Several other school employees has said the same and all just tell me how smart, sweet and well mannered he is and how much they enjoy him.

[NowWhat]

Did he ever explain why he hit this other kid? Was he provoked? And did he explain why he went to the bathroom on the wall?
From what you are saying that must have seemed so out of character for him.