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Gadget0621 · Nov 12, 2005, 03:35 AM

I just recently returned home to hang out with my ex before he left for New York and now I'm regretting it. I can't stop thinking about him and I thought that I had gotten past my feelings. I want him to know how I feel but I'm afraid of what he is going to say. Should I follow my heart and let him know that I miss him or will that only make it worse for the both of us? I just want him to be happy and I don't want to scare him off. Please help!

fredg · Nov 12, 2005, 05:19 AM

Hi,
There is absolutely nothing wrong in talking with your ex. You determine what your future will be, and the only way to know what your ex feels is to ask him.
Be honest with him, and let him tell you how he feels. In that way, you will know whether to continue talking, or start making some new friends, and try forgetting about him... it will take some time if this needs to be done.

JoeCanada76 · Nov 13, 2005, 08:57 AM

If you have certain feelings about your ex and you want to tell, then do tell if you feel it is the right thing to do. It might or might not turn out but how will you know if you do not try. Follow your heart. Remember though that it could go eighter way but no matter what you are being true to your feelings instead of hiding away from them.

Joe

ranieri · Nov 21, 2005, 08:13 AM

Stop thinking every relationship has to go to a steady bo or marriage. You've got 3-4 years before you meet up. Sloooow down. Peace ranieri

Gadget0621 · Nov 21, 2005, 06:56 PM

Originally Posted by ranieri

Stop thinking every relationship has to go to a steady bo or marriage. You've got 3-4 years before you meet up. Sloooow down. peace ranieri

It has been 4 years since I have had a boyfriend. I am tired of having meaningless relationships. In my religion its recommended that you court someone instead of dating. This means that you go into the relationship with the expectations that you want a long term relationship. I don't want to be married now because I know that I'm not ready for that type of commitment. I am just looking for love, what's wrong with that? I have been hurt too many times so I don't want to give my heart without knowing that those same feelings will be returned. I don't want to be used and then thrown away anymore.

fredg · Nov 22, 2005, 06:01 AM

Hi,
Your comments are very, very good. But, if you really fall in love with someone, you have no guarantee that he will really love you as well.
There is absolutely nothing wrong in looking for love, without thinking about marriage. Going out with more than one man is good, meeting new people is good.
Life is full of both surprises and disappointments. Again, if you give your heart to someone, there is no guarantee that your love will be returned.
It's all part of life.
Don't be frustrated with not having a boyfriend for 4 yrs. Keep looking, and you will find someone. Just be honest with him, and if he does mention marriage, just tell him you aren't interested in that right now. I do wish you good luck, and hang in there.

Gadget0621 · Nov 22, 2005, 04:40 PM

Originally Posted by fredg

Hi,
Your comments are very, very good. But, if you really fall in love with someone, you have no guarantee that he will really love you as well.
There is absolutely nothing wrong in looking for love, without thinking about marriage. Going out with more than one man is good, meeting new people is good.
Life is full of both surprises and disappointments. Again, if you give your heart to someone, there is no guarantee that your love will be returned.
It's all part of life.
Don't be frustrated with not having a boyfriend for 4 yrs. Keep looking, and you will find someone. Just be honest with him, and if he does mention marriage, just tell him you aren't interested in that right now. I do wish you good luck, and hang in there.

Thank you for your advice. It was encouraging.