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K2003 · Nov 1, 2007, 09:09 AM

I've been working working with a man (who is married) for the past 4 months. He started trying to get with me only 2 weeks after he got married! I have been saying no to him from day one but somehow he always seems to make me fall for the things he says to me. He tells me that he cares about me a lot and that he feels for me. Well to make a long story short, I slept with him and now I feel such an incredible guilt. However, when I told him I couldn't do that anymore he got mad and stopped talking to me for a while. He later apologized and continued to suck me back in. I can't understand why when I am strong and tell him NO and then he doesn't call, I feel sad. My question is how in the world do I get out of this situation. I'm beginning to have feelings for a man that I know is so decietful. I can't leave my job so what else can I do to get over this man??

ordinaryguy · Nov 1, 2007, 10:04 AM

Grow a spine. Say NO every time, and mean it.

Rockstar714 · Nov 1, 2007, 10:50 AM

Stop answering his calls, tell yourself that he's not worth it and find someone that isn't married. And keep saying NO to him

Silent Breeze · Nov 1, 2007, 11:27 AM

Show him that when you say no, you mean no. Threaten to tell his wife (the poor woman must be told). And as for your feelings, whenever he pops in your mind, make him pop right out, and try to hook yourself up with an honest, SINGLE, man who deserves your time. Goodluck!

edzmedz · Nov 1, 2007, 01:42 PM

"I can't understand why when I am strong and tell him NO and then he doesn't call, I feel sad"

U just like the attention he gives you obviously, and it's normal. If you had a partner and you were happy with him I don't think he would be getting to you this easily. I am not sure if you ignore him he will stop bugging u. He might go on for a while, so you have to be ready to cope with it. I don't think you should threaten him with his wife, he might react in a nasty way. I mean OK women should help each other out but this is her problem not yours so don't play supergirl.
Is he your boss or just a colleague? If you have to be with him all the time you can simply ask him to remain professional during working hours , and to talk to you about private matters only after work (which is when you will try to ignore him). Whenever he does, remind him about the rule and never reply to any of his personal questions or advances during work.
Since the mood during the day will be much more professional, at night you will be more focused and will be more capable of ignoring him. It's probably hard to get a new boyfriend instantly , but I am sure you can try and hang out with your friends more often. That will surely help.

linds03 · Nov 4, 2007, 10:43 AM

Tell his wife. He doesn't deserve a wife ever. You both owe her that, don't you think??

Tranquility · Nov 4, 2007, 10:57 AM

If U remain in d relationship, it would get worse and harder to leave. U sound like a nice person. U deserve better and u are worth more than this.

manishkochhar · Nov 4, 2007, 11:00 AM

Originally Posted by K2003

I've been working working with a man (who is married) for the past 4 months. He started trying to get with me only 2 weeks after he got married! I have been saying no to him from day one but somehow he always seems to make me fall for the things he says to me. He tells me that he cares about me a lot and that he feels for me. Well to make a long story short, I slept with him and now I feel such an incredible guilt. However, when I told him I couldn't do that anymore he got mad and stopped talking to me for a while. He later apologized and continued to suck me back in. I can't understand why when I am strong and tell him NO and then he doesn't call, I feel sad. My question is how in the world do I get out of this situation. I'm beginning to have feelings for a man that I know is so decietful. I can't leave my job so what else can I do to get over this man???

Just say a plain and sturn no to him, he is fooling his wife as well as u.

N0help4u · Nov 4, 2007, 11:53 AM

After 2 weeks of marriage and he is already cheating this should tell you the whole story on HIM! Think of yourself and how you would feel if he left her for you and then you were in her position with him cheating on you. When he asks visualize this. When he gets mad realize it is a tactic to make you feel guilty and realize there is even more guilt giving in in the long run.

NowWhat · Nov 5, 2007, 07:50 AM

He doesn't talk to you because if you are going to say no - you are of no use to him. You mean nothing more to him than someone he can have sex with. He doesn't need a meaningful relationship. He's has a wife for that.
He wants nothing more from you than sex.
Wake up and see it. He is using you and abusing his wife.