[kimberlydoll]

This guy I have liked since last year, he has never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl before. We are both in our second year of college and I started liking him at the end of last year.

I know this is dumb but one night we flirted while we were drunk. My pals there knew I still liked him so they encouraged us and kept trying to make us touch each other, he kept subtlely trying to touch me and even asked me if I thought he was attractive. He held doors open for me and such. I almost told him I liked him but backed out and left. He was like what just happened and left me 2 voicemails later one saying "I hope you got back to your room ok Ill see you or IM you" and he did he imed me the next morning and he kept asking me questions about how I was and my hangover and stuff. He also wrote on my Facebook wall. Hes never done any of these things before, I thought they were good signs, I was told a guy would never say those things if he didn't like you. I also know you shouldn't ever believe someone while they are drunk but he left me those messages when he was sober.
The day after at practice he joined the crowd and said Hi How are U, I thought this was a good sign. I knew he is inexperienced. Later he started acting kind of awkward around me, it could have been my imagination since he’s an awkward kind of boy. I thought it might be because he liked me. Well my friend who was there that night who is close friends with him, I asked him what I should do? And he said "He doesn’t have feelings for you, its as simple as that. A 1000 people there that night constantly badgered him about you afterwards, that didn't help a huge amount.” I told him about the messages and he said “He never said anything about those. He's stupid trust me, didn't mean anything by it prob. Wondered why you were acting funny, hed like to be friends though" I was sad but held onto the hope my crush didn't say he liked me because he was annoyed with people frustrating him. In fact, 1 boy did it in front of me once and he seemed sad after that and his friend commented.
But my crush and his best friends found out my friend told me this stuff and apparently were a little irritated with him saying “he had no place to do that.” so this means he doesn't like me right?The day they found out that I knew, my crush randomly said hi to me when I thought he was ignoring me during a band competition. He was standing by me and I was ignoring him because Im trying to move on and apparently he noticed me. And later that night I hung out with a bunch of people and he walked into the room and said Hey everyone and then hey to me. He does say hi to me whenever he passes me (but now I feel so awkward I avoid his gaze and hope he won't say hi to me.) am I reading too much into this? Because I'm pretty sure he doesn't like me if he didn't tell his best friends and such. Hes saying hi to be nice to me and no hard feelings?

[Keatts16]

The way I would take that, is that he DOES like you, and is just embarrassed... maybe you should ask him how he feels?

[BleedingLove_XOX]

I Feel As If He Does Like You
Don't Ignore Him... Go Along With It. If He Says Hi To You Say Hi Back, If You Catch Him Looking At You Smile At Him. If He Does Like You THis Will Progress And You Will Become Closer !
He Probably Isn't Telling Anyone He Likes you Because He's Scared What We'll Happen, Everything Will Fall Into Place Soon Hopefully.

Good Luck = )

[kimberlydoll]

So I should wait it out?

[BleedingLove_XOX]

Yerh.. a month maximum though = ). By then you should be seeing al th signs and be able to tell if he likes you or not.

[kimberlydoll]

I like this guy who has never had a girlfriend or kissed a girl before. I have had a lot of guys like me but I'm also very inexperienced cause usually jerks go for me and or friends I'm not interested in.
Anyway, I won't go into details but basically this guy did some things that convinced me and his friends that he must feel the same way and just be very shy. However, not long after these incidents, some of his friends bugged him a bit, told him Ive liked him since last year, nudged him on and so. They had good intentions- they backfired and some of them apologized (they’ve stopped) My crush told them and his very close friends he doesn’t like me. Although apparently he still wants to be my friend but we weren’t by any means close before. Im a bit mad that I had to hear this through gossip (and no my friends aren’t lying) and that he wouldn’t tell me.
I haven’t been hanging around him for awhile now, just cause Im so busy, but he still says hi all the time when passing me. The past couple times he has said hi, I haven’t been doing it to be mean, but I just don’t say hi outloud back. Im usually walking with other people and I look at him so its not like I'm ignoring him completely- I didn’t even think he’d notice, he's so clueless. But the other day he asked my good friend randomly why when he says hi I don’t respond back so he did apparently notice. Does he just like the attention or something? We weren’t close before, I don’t see what the big deal is. Im sure he doesn’t like me if he didn’t seize the opportunity when my friends said Hey she likes you.

[Kaos8888]

Some guys usually the shy ones, can often be indecieve and unpredictable. They don't usually take risks or opportunities. The best thing you can do is be open and friendly with him, say hi and talk to him occasionally. He's probably not an open or trusting person and is probably quiet. Before anything between you advances towards a relationship, you need to develop trust and friendship with him. He probably is acting this way because he is unsure if you like him, he'll be cautious and avouid making any moves till he's sure. And even though he's been told by your friends that you like him, he's not trusting so he won't believe it till he hears it directly from you. I don't know what kind of personality he has so I can evaluate it any further. However, if you want to accelerate things I would write him a note explaining how you feel and that you expect a note back, you might find that he'll be a little more open in a note, or you can try txting him.

(i answer this with personal opinion and not in professional capacity)

[jameson6950]

I concur with Kaos8888. I still suffer from shyness. It sucks.

[kimberlydoll]

When a guy calls you and leaves a message saying "hope you got back to your room ok ill im you tomorrow" and he does that.

I got a bit tipsy and flirted with my crush. He def. flirted back, there were some there who said "he might like you." Im not even sure how drunk he was, he sometimes does this thing where he has 2 and "pretends" and someone yelled at him for doing it that night. I almost told him I liked him after the party. I went to his room and said "lets talk" but chickened out and just left. He then left me 2 voicemails one saying that.

Hes just worried I'm pissed at him right? We're friends (not very good friends though) and he's never shown any real unmistakable interest while sober. Maybe some small signs (he did randomly touch me on the shoulders twice when he doesn't usually, and he once did give me a... "different" look when his friend showed me his phone and there was a text stating "Get a date" but I chalk it up to me liking him so much I psychoanalyze it and read too much into things. Im sure I was imagining things, anyway Im pretty sure he knows I like him, someone told him once but he said "Oh so I should be on the lookout?" what the hell so it might be him just being weird because he knows)
Hes never had a girlfriend or even kissed a girl before. He does have some gay tendencies but he also has some other not so gay tendencies. I guess for awhile because of the no girlfriend thing I thought he must be secretly gay. But then I found out he use to like all these girls. Guys are confusing

[Ladyviper]

What is stopping you again? If you like him tell him that! Life is too short to be worried about the little things, go for it. If you always go for it, you will never look back with regret. Tell him how you feel!

[Dawn92]

Dude, just because he's never had a girlfriend does NOT make him gay.
There are plenty of people who have never had dates, but that is usually because of low self esteem or fear.
Perhaps he likes you in the same way you like him but like you he is also too scared to tell you.
I would just tell him. Maybe before you go on a trip so you don't have to seem him for a while if things get awkward.

I know this post is way old but I thought I would chip in.
Any news on you and him since October?

[kimberlydoll]

Hey all. I have only had one boyfriend- my high school boyfriend. He and I planned on not breaking up for college. However, I wasn't sure if he understood how hard it would be so I started pressing the issue more with him. When I pressed him on the final night, he broke it off. About a month into college, he started calling a lot and basically hinted that he wanted to get back together. So we did, although it bothered me he wouldn't put In a Relationship on Facebook. But he broke it off again right before Christmas break. Im not sure why, it might have been the distance or the fact that we had some arguments. That break was so hard, I missed him so much. He did still want to see me and be friends and it eventually led to friends with benefits. I knew that was so stupid but I thought he'd come back.

Im in my second year of college. Last summer after fighting over getting back together, I broke it off right before school, but we ended up talking again 2 months later and this past Christmas we spent a ton of time together. He was extra lovey dovey. He invited me to his family parties which my parents thought was weird since Im not his girlfriend. His Mom even introduced me as "his girlfriend" to her friends but he said well you're not later when I remarked on that.

He didn't just use me for sex. He does care about me. I was his best friend- he told me everything, he didn't really tell his other friends anything really important. If he was just using me for sex I would have never done this. Our 'friends with benefits' was us being together without calling it that, and he knew that too, because last summer he felt like he'd been "dumped" I did talk about what would happen after college but he's will prob get his masters at his school and I want to go into a field that doesn't have that many grad schools. He didn't say anything else. When I said "well after college this is off" he just goes "is that a threat?" and says he'll come visit me at grad school too. He did once say he loved me last year (he let it slip when I went to the hospital) but never again said it and whenever I brought it up if he loves me or not he goes "no comment" or "Im not answering that"

I initiated NC again last January after Christmas break. Ive learned my lesson and I don't want to go down that road again. I sent him an email I explained myself thoroughly in the email saying I couldn't be just friends with him and I didn't want to waste anymore time on him since he showed no intention of us getting back together now or in the future. That if he loved me he would want to be with me and that's it. His response was "Im sorry, you know I do care about you and you're my best friend- I wasnt lying about that. I dont know what the future has in store. I dont know what I want to do."

Its been a little over 2 months. I have had days where I haven't thought about him at all but its prob because I am busy a lot because whenever Im not I still think about him. I have for the first time actually seen glimpses of a future without him in it and been OK with it and have started maybe looking for other guys.
Then he sent me a message saying "Hey, just wondering how you're doing." I was completely surprised, I thought hed be way too stubborn to initate any contact with me. Ive deleted him off Facebook, myspace, aim and on my phone. This doesn't mean anything right? And why the hell is he still talking to me? Didn't I make myself clear when I said I didn't want to be friends with him? Is he hoping I changed my mind? After a couple days I decide to reply. I did tell him how I was, but I left out important juicy things (like briefly dating someone else) and only told him mundane stuff. I ended it by saying "I havent changed my mind at all from what I said earlier, I dont need your friendship and would rather limit my friends circle to those who dont mess with my emotions so much. Thus, I still think its best we part ways completely."

[Fr_Chuck]

I can't figure out why you broke up, because it was going to be "hard" to stay together in college ?

I have to say breaking up before you have a problem has to be the silliest thing I have ever heard. And he only agrees to break up after being hounded to break up.

Just because you say NC does not mean he says it, you are expecting him to listen to you for some reason, I can't understand, he does not want to break up, but it sounds like you think you do.