[flowergurl]

I met this guy we hit it off instantly, had everything in common, mutual attraction, been talking for a couple of weeks.. then out of the blue he stops talking to me... when I question this he says he's having a lot of personal problems thrown to him at once and he prefers to be left alone when feeling like this... he says I did or said nothing wrong... I don't know him that well but I'm thinking everyone's got problems why cut off someone you supposedly like?. it makes no sense to me.. so I'm thinking he's just giving me the old its not you its me excuse... so a couple days pass and I contact him saying to just be honest what happened and he's like... "i was honest i have no reason to lie and i will see you when im feeling better..if you still want to"... after days of ignoring me now he acknowledges he will eventually see me / speak to me when he's feeling better... im thinking he just said that to calm me down and get me off his back or am I over paranoid. Im thinking I should just leave him alone and whatever happens... happens... but I really like him a lot - that would really suck for me if it turns out he just dropped me for no reason..

[andrea_louise]

Think you should leave him be, don't worry. Let him deal with whatever problems he has, you should not waste anymore of your time with him.

[msilva76]

I agree leave him alone and go find someone else

[madaman]

Honestly he may be dealing with a problem similar to other people in this forum. I know Ive met a few girls after my breakup and I do like them, but the breakup damage is too soon to really focus on them. I also have the problem of ignoring my personal problems and not dealing with them when I meet someone interesting but I'm not letting it happen this time.

Either way you have to wait for him to contact you and be honest about what is going on, you aren't going to get any real answers out of him if you ask again.

[jeffatl]

What's wrong? He told you he needs some time... give it to him. Be glad he was honest with you. Think about it, you have no idea what he could be going through... you don't really know him. He probably needs some time to sort things out... considering he TOLD you that. I would say if you really like him, leave him be. This guy sounds straight forward and honest, you are going to bother him away if you don't watch it. I wouldn't say he is "ignoring you", calm down and back off... if he doesn't call you, his loss.
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[kp2171]

Give him time to sort himself out... in the meantime don't hold yourself back.

When I was first dating my wife I stepped back early on... she had a daughter, which meant I needed to be more serious or not about the relationship... and I was planning on moving out of town...

I took what she calls my "cave time"... ran away a little bit to figure out what the hell to do next. So... its not all bad news necessarily, but its also no guarantee.

We all get some emotional baggage in time... maybe he's dealing with his. And maybe it'll all pass. Or not.

You also need to keep yourself first in the list of priorities... so even through his taking time to sort himself out isn't all bad... that doesn't mean you owe him time...

I've been with women that I just wasn't ready to date. Maybe that's the case here. Or maybe you are right and he just needs to work it out in his head, like I did.

I know its maddening. My answer is that there isn't a perfect answer.

If you were my sis or friend id tell you to move on a little.. its OK to keep him in the picture a bit, but he's going to have to chase you a little... cause you do want someone who wants to chase you, right?

So give him some room and stick to you standards. He can take some time, but he's got some work to do too...

In the meantime, if you see someone else interesting, look around and keep your options open...