[BRFCAREOK]

Why is SEX so important to us all if it takes up sooooo little of our total time??

For example - the experts tell us that people in a "healthy" married relationship should have sex 2 or 3 times per week on average (personally - I think it is more like 1 or 2 after being married for 7 years or more - and I am told I have a healthy sex life by friends!! ).

So, if sex takes 15 minutes (average)... and it is done 2 times per week... that is only 30 minutes total time. With 168 hours in a week that is .3% (point 3 percent) of the total time in a week.

Yet we are ALL (including me) so obsessed with how often WE get it, how often our friends get it, how often the TV people get it... you get the idea.

Both men AND women seem obsessed about it... but when it comes right down to it... even if you increased your nookie time two-fold... no, THREE-fold... it would still be LESS THAN 1% of the time available to us.

So, WHY WHY WHY do we all want it MORE MORE MORE and seem to feel "sad" that we aren't getting it enough. Is it because we "view" oursleves as being "better" the more sex we get? Are we all void of true healthy self-esteem? If we aren't getting it at home are we ALL subject to find it outside our marriage eventually?

Everyone's opinions are welcome!!

[bignaked101]

Seriously though, if you think about the people who aren't married, they get sex on and off, it's like a roller coaster, going up and down, one day a man or woman could be getting as much nookie as he/she needs, and then the next him or her are looking again. When everyone's downfall comes along, they feel that they haven't had sex in about 3-4 months when in all reality it's been a week, the reality is, we don't want more, we just feel that we want more because we are all addicted in some sort of way, it's like heroin, once we get that "fix" all we can do is sit and search for more, we seriously are a very hopeless race, us humans, we act worse than animals with our "addictions" that we get.. If I may say so, we humans take it for granted every day how spoiled we actually are...

[donf]

Why is sex so important to me? That's a tough one. I enjoy sex because physically it is fun. On another level it a statement of love from my wife to me. She is willing to share her very own body with me, something she would never do with anyone else.

It's my responsibility to take this gift and cherish it as the gift that it is.

Unmarried folks look at sex as a recreational sport, I don't understand this at all.

[Khianu]

I'm a 19 year old male and agree entirely with the last statement that it is, in a way, a gift, something special that is to be shared between the two married people, something that, in the world where everything seems to be published, can be specific and unique to the pair of you. However this view seems to be rather obsolete nowadays as anyone I'm sure would struggle to find someone my age that hasn't slept with at least 2 or 3 individuals up till now and I really can't understand why anyone would waste the special experience with the single person for, as the question states, about 30 minutes a week. I'm sure people would try and use the excuse that they didn't know but I'm sure there are plenty of people who had a good first experience with sex by which I mean that it was special, not that it was "fun", and so could have thought at that point that they would perhaps try and hold back until they were again with someone special. It seems to me that the human race is become much more animalistic than previously with regards to this which does seem a bit of a step back to me but I seem to be very much alone with these opinions. Anyway, these seem to be my views frequently nowadays and wondering how other people feel about it?

[hollylovesbrandon]

Because it's fun. Need I say more? But seriously though. Just knowing that you have someone that is willing to give you that most fabulous gift makes it special. As soon as I take my clothes off I see my husband's eyes light up. It's not because I'm naked... but because he knows I am about to give my whole self to him, something no one else has ever done. That is one of the greatest gifts one can be given.

[Khianu]

I was wondering if I may ask if it really does stay that special if, before marriage or before the relationship, you or your partner had the same special thing with someone else, or multiple other people? Also, if they had a promiscuous sex life and thus were with people where it wasn't considered special, in my mind it's still the special thing that they've given away to someone else but simply carelessly given it. I am still young and know that I'll probably find out but my last and only partner cheated on me and ended the relationship so am wondering if it will feel that special again and whether the previous relationships of my future partner will always be there in my mind bothering me. Sorry for getting of topic of the question but thanks.

[hollylovesbrandon]

Please feel free to start your own thread and ask your question as to not take away from the question at hand.

[sylvan_1998]

To play the devil's advocate, if this is less than one percent of our time, and 99 percent of out time is spent on other things. Follow me here. All this time spent on other things with out spouses and families, why is sex with someone else (less than 1 percent of the time spent) the one thing that totally can screw up a marriage?

Why can it not be treated like dancing. All spouses do not dance nor do they dance well. When someone finds a good dance partner is it not okay for them to dance together? What makes sex different?

Before people slam me, I am only asking the question in an effort to answer the original question. If you can explain why the act is so defining, then maybe you can define why it is so important.

[Notnow]

Easy! Sex is as important as it is perceived to be important. But perceived by whom?

Why IS IT considered to be important? Is it a commodity? Is it just another physical bodily function for relief? Wank wank? Is it 2 people sharing relief, not necessarily more than that moment?

Is it LOVE?? I'd like to hear views of women who have to put up with fat git husbands poking them in the back, just because the male has had a sex dream...
Does that give them the right to request/demand sex?


Now, talk about giving... where is the giving in this?