[step2be]

I am divorced, and I am engaged to be married. My fiancé has a 6 year old daughter. I have a 5 year old daughter and a 6 year old son.

My children are and have been happily involved in various activities. My son is in baseball and football... my daughter is in dance. This year my son told me he would like to take tap dance as well, so I enrolled him and he loves it.

Last week my fiance's Ex called to say she is enrolling their daughter in Poms and cheerleading and the class is on the night we usually have their daughter at our house.

So, this week we took her to her class, and my daughter discovered that three of her friends from school are in the class as well. Of course she was thrilled, she loved the fact that they dance with big sparkling poms, and so she really wanted to join the class. Both girls were excited about taking the class together.

Well, the EX was pi_ _ed! She demanded that we not do it, because she wants her daughter to have this all to herself. She insist that she needs to have her own thing... just for her. During her verbal blast of me on the phone, she stated, "any therapist will tell you that kids need seperate activities."

I have searched high and low and I can't find anything that directly relates to this issue... so I am asking for your feedback. These kids love each other, and I feel it would help to bond and blend the girls if they share an interest/activity.

[fredg]

Hi,
Your ex seems very, very selfish. The issue here is that your ex doesn't want the child having so much fun without her "say-so"!
Well adjusted, normal children, as your's are, have so much more fun with friends. Your ex is completely out of line, and there is a selfish motive here somewhere.
The child needs friends, and to have fun in what one is doing is the key. If this child is made to have activities by itself, then it could lead to not enjoying what she is doing.
Again, your ex just simply can't stand the thought of the child having fun when someone else has planned the activities, instead of her!

Best of luck,
fredg

[leatherseats]

Sounds like your ex needs to "take a pill".

Your next ten to twelve years should focus on what's best for the kids, not you or your ex. If the kids like each other and want to be in the same class... thats what should happen.

Be careful how much power you give to someone who no longer is the focus of your life (the ex) and empower all who are the focus (your kids and your fiance).

Best of Luck:-)