[maddy1]

Over the last 10 years I have known a couple women that have used abortion as a form of birth control. They have excuses such as : the pill makes me gain weight, it doesn't feel the same with a condom on, oops...
I firmly believe in a woman's right to choose what she wants to do with her body, and understand sometimes s#it happens. But when does it become your responsibility to do a little more than just call and make an appointment to " have it taken care of".
At the end of the day, we all have to live with the choices we make, but how do you respond to someone when what they are doing is so irresponsible?
Is it just that after a few, it becomes nothing to them anymore? I love these women, and want to be supportive, but, it gets more difficult every time I get that call...
Thoughts?

[IntroducingEmy]

I'm extremely pro-choice and behavior like this worries me because it could jeopardize the rights of women who could desperately need this in the future. I would think it would be easier to just use a method of birth control, now that there are some really easy ones like the patch and ring rather than going to all the trouble of an abortion.

I also wouldn't be proud of the fact or telling anyone about my abortion or abortions, except perhaps my spouse or parents. It could be construed by people who don't understand the situation as being pro-abortion, which no one should be.

I should also think that having so many abortions could become dangerous or up your risk factor substantially, even though when done correctly, is safer than childbirth. At least FDA approved birth control methods are reasonably safe and don't leave you feel cornered or that you're using your last ditch effort. I would worry greatly for a friend who feels abortions are a commonplace aspect of their life (not saying you should, just my own thoughts). It also shows a lack of self-control, responsibility, and just plain disrespect for life or the prospect of, therein, when you're allowing yourself indirectly to become pregnant just to terminate it.

I'm not sure if you want any advice but if you're confronted with the situation maybe you should ask them to talk to a doctor about their need for frequent abortions. It'll be cheaper to use birth control than to pay for a failed abortion. At least you're being a good friend by tolerating and being supportive of their choices, but if they ever ask for your opinion I wouldn't brush it under the rug since it might save them a lot of heartache in the future.

All right, I'm done huffing and puffing on my soapbox.

[maddy1]

They have never asked for my opinion, but I do give it to them. I am the one crying in the conversation, telling them it's time to get it together. I guess more than anything I have to get it out because I just don't get it. The thing that really gets me is that they have other children. It seems so crazy to me that they could pick one over another to keep. The abortions were before and after they had a baby. And the children were not planned either. I have one baby, unplanned, and not in the best of circumstances. All of my options were explored before I decided to have her. I know I made the absolute best choice for me. I was on the pill when I got pregnant, so I thought I would be justified with not having her as I was trying to prevent getting pregnant.
But, I have been abstinent since I have had her. And until I feel very secure that the form of BC I use will be a bit more foolproof, I will remain that way.

I don't know, I guess I am just venting.. I don't want to go on to them and make them feel worse than I am sure they feel. I don't believe that they don't think of their choices everyday.