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danielnoahsmommy · Sep 3, 2007, 07:46 AM

My first cousin I s getting married in about 2 months. She and I were never close. When I got married she gave me 1 whine goblet with religious emblems on it (may spent $30.00) had no travel expense. I on the other hand have to drive 6 plus hours (each way) by myself, leaving my child and husband and spending 125.00 night on a hotel. We were not budgeting for this expense, as we are not close.

I found a beautiful decorative plate that has their names and wedding date. Is this an appropriate gift?

Please don't say why go, as she does not have a large family and not many people would be there for her.

Synnen · Sep 3, 2007, 07:59 AM

An appropriate wedding gift is anything you can afford, that you've given some thought to.

I think that your gift will be a lovely one.

danielnoahsmommy · Sep 3, 2007, 08:11 AM

Thank you! My mother-in-law saw it last night and did not like it, she thought money would be proper.

Synnen · Sep 3, 2007, 08:16 AM

Okay... money is NEVER a "proper" gift.

You can tell you mother-in-law I said so, too!

As badly as we needed money when we got married, I cherish the little gifts that are reminders of that day--I got a wedding plate (which I love, and have hanging on the wall), a "First Christmas Together" ornament, a little statue of a bride and groom dancing. I got useful stuff too--appliances, and blankets and what have you.

The fact that someone thought about what to get me, rather than just falling back on cash, meant so much more to me.

Cash to me says "everyone can use money, and I didn't bother thinking about YOU personally"

startover22 · Sep 3, 2007, 08:19 AM

I agree with Synnen on this one. The plate sounds like it came from your heart! Good judgement! Have fun!

LearningAsIGo · Sep 4, 2007, 10:49 AM

Sounds cute! Believe me, your travel time will speak volumes to her... she'll be thrilled to see you :)

alkalineangel · Sep 4, 2007, 10:56 AM

I agree with Synnen, we got money, and it was nice, but the three things I cherish the most are a wedding frame with our picture in it, a handmade wooden plaque with our wedding invite and dried flowers shalacked to it, and a willow tree statue of a man holding his wife in his arms. I remember exactly who gave them to me and I display them proudly every day. Mementos are the best way to go.

Wondergirl · Sep 4, 2007, 10:57 AM

I agree about well-thought-out gifts being more valuable than money. Money gets spent and forgotten about. The beautiful plate you chose will always be a lovely reminder of that special day.

Someone gave me as a wedding gift a spice rack that will be handed down to one of my sons who likes to cook and bake. (It's well-made from wood with cute little spice bottles.) I have similar things that were grandmothers' and great aunts' wedding gifts.

Chery · Sep 4, 2007, 11:03 AM

Originally Posted by danielnoahsmommy

My first cousin i s getting married in about 2 months. she and I were never close. when I got married she gave me 1 whine goblet with religious emblems on it (may spent $30.00) had no travel expense. I on the other hand have to drive 6 plus hours (each way) by myself, leaving my child and husband and spending 125.00 night on a hotel. We were not budgeting for this expense, as we are not close.

I found a beautiful decorative plate that has their names and wedding date. is this an appropriate gift?

please dont say why go, as she does not have a large family and not many people would be there for her.

I think that the engraved plate is better than money too. I certainly would have appreciated it.